Indoprism

Strolling through

2011-07-15T21:57:00.001+07:00

We've been in my hometown almost a week now. The weather has been gorgeous - so much nicer than way-too-hot-and-humid North Carolina or pollution-hazed Jakarta. Just lovely. And the evenings have been long and summery and fragrant.

I lived here for 11 years straight, between the ages of 5-16, and then on and off for another 7 years finishing high school and coming back while at college. My mother still lives in the house I grew up in, although the back half has been turned into student housing. But it still feels like home, and I guess it will always feel that way. I just can't imagine North Carolina, or DC, or anywhere ever feeling so deeply like home as it does here. I can't imagine it, but maybe once we've lived in one place for several years and we are entrenched in the boys' school and jobs, and surrounded by friends and routine, somewhere else could feel so much like home.

One of my favorite things to do here is to stroll through my childhood neighborhood in the evenings. No other neighborhood compares. There are old trees forming a canopy over the streets, a mixture of houses with different architecture styles and owner styles, sidewalks over flat land, chirping birds and hopping bunnies. And it is familiar and brings back wonderful memories of youth and care-free summer days and silly-girl chats.

On those walks I take a deep breath and can smell those days. There was so much giggling and friendships and insecurities, boy notes and homework and wide-open possibilities. It's funny to think of myself in those days, not knowing who I'd grow up to be or where I'd end up. I know I imagined exciting adventures across the oceans, but I never imagined the beaches and Hindu temples of Bali or sitting around with people I loved around a fire in Mali. I imagined being happily married with 2 children (although both not boys!), and for that I am so grateful. I am so grateful for it all. I think my little girl self would be very happy with the dreams her adult self has been able to realize.

Now, as I stroll the sidewalks I walked at some of the most significant stages of my life, my thoughts don't wander so much towards the dreams of my future. I suppose they are much more "adult" thoughts now centered on the present, focusing on the boys' needs, shopping lists, relationship matters, career decisions, family health issues, making new friends and beginning a new life chapter. And once again, as I find myself at a significant crossroads in my life, I am happy I have the good fortune to stroll those same lovely streets to help my mind work it all out.

Transitions

2011-07-01T06:23:00.000+07:00

...are tough. Plain and simple, tough. Even when they're exciting, even when they're adventurous, even when they're joyful, they are also challenging, stressful, new, scary... And as much as you may be prepared for them, mentally and emotionally, there are still some rough waters as you swim to the other side.

We only left Jakarta two weeks ago, but in some ways it feels like an eternity. And even though most things are happening the way I expected, all this change and difference is still challenging. By all accounts our temporary apartment is great and comfortable, but it's still temporary and I'm still dying to get into our new house. We are lucky to already have a few friends here, but it is summer and they are busy and I am feeling a bit lonely. The boys have been pretty good considering the massive changes that are rocking their world, but they are with each other constantly and fighting heaps and driving me crazy. We were expecting our shipment from Jakarta to be delivered the end of July, but it now looks like it will be delivered the middle of August and just that two week difference is completely throwing off my schedule and my expectations.

So really, everything is going well and for the most part the way I expected and what I was prepared for. And yet. And yet it's still just - tough. And for this it is going as expected as well. I knew it would be tough. But it's still the getting through it. And I still want to complain. :)

The boys and I have been having fun rediscovering the area. I feel confident that we will be happy here and it will be an excellent place for the boys to grow up. Everyone is really nice. And that's saying a lot considering where we are coming from - a country rich in personal kindness! I suspected that being in a small town that is surrounded by two big cities would be a pretty ideal situation for me, and I still believe that to be true. It provides an intimacy and down-home feel that I grew up with in Wisconsin, but also supplies a diversity and cultural richness that I crave. The area may fall short in global understanding, but people have told me it does exist and is growing. I feel positive about our decision and once we are really settled, I hope we will know it was the right one.

For now I will endure the transition the best I can, continue to repeat my motto of the summer, 'it is what it is', and try to keep smiling.

Happy number 11

2011-06-11T17:21:00.005+07:00

Happy 11th Anniversary to my wonderful husband. For our fabulous adventures, for our beautiful boys, for loving me, thank you! I love you!

A mixed bag

2011-06-11T15:47:00.003+07:00

It is a funny ride, this roller coaster of moving. Every day seems to reach new emotional highs and lows, new loves and hates, new levels of excitement and distress. We have known for months that we would be leaving Indonesia. We haven't always known where we were going, but we knew it was time for us to say selamat jalan to the country we have called home for 4.5 years. It wasn't an easy decision, but we always knew it would be one we would make eventually. Almost 5 years is long enough to live abroad, at least in a challenging city like Jakarta and so far from our real home.

A few months ago this city and this country were driving me nuts. Everything about it was wrong, nothing worked, it was all frustrating and stupid, it was dirty and smelly, etc. Fortunately at the time I recognized this for what it was - my brain's way of detaching myself emotionally from a place and from people I have loved. If you accept the approaching departure, you must look forward instead of dwelling on everything that has been and everything that is wonderful. And in order to do that, it seems to me that many people going through a major move deal with it by hating the place they have to leave. It makes sense to me, and is probably (hopefully!) a very healthy process. And I got to the other side of it - I still love it here, I still recognize the wonderful things about this place, I know I will miss it immensely. But I also recognize all that is horrible and all the things I am looking forward to bidding a fond farewell!

In this light, a review of what I find lovely about living in Jakarta and Indonesia, and all that I'm looking forward to in America.

What I will miss...
- Indonesians are incredibly kind and gentle
- There is never a dull day here
- The challenges of living in a foreign country push you continuously
- All the color and richness of this place that make it unique and interesting (for example, I have never tired of seeing the carts on the side of the road selling food or house essentials, or of people wearing batik clothing, etc)
- Hearing foreign languages all the time
- Always seeing people who look different from us, it's not a sea of white
- My lifestyle here has been luxurious, in so many ways
- Financial comfort
- Our house staff who takes care of us almost every day
- My free time
- Our ability to have our nanny work almost any night we ask, with short notice
- The spas!!! (massages, facials, reflexology, manis and pedis, etc)
- The relatively cheap and easy travel around Asia
- Tropical islands, adventure travel
- Swimming pool in our backyard
- Our wonderful, safe complex which has loads of kids and playgrounds
- Our good friends
- So much time to get to hang out with friends
- Jakarta International School
- Premier movie theaters (lazy boy recliner, blankets, meal service)
- Nice indoor playcenters
- Great Asian food
- Bali is only a 90 minute flight away

What I will not miss about Jakarta/Indonesia...
- The traffic! The motorcycles!
- The pollution!
- Too many people, everywhere
- Constantly getting sick, weird diseases
- The threat of Dengue fever
- Not being able to return things to stores
- Being surrounded by people who don't use critical thinking skills
- Lack of nice parks and places to go outside within Jakarta
- Having nice parks and beaches within 60 miles but that take hours to get to due to traffic
- The feeling that this life is not normal
- Being so far away physically from family and friends back home
- 12 hour time difference between here and home
- The 35 hours it takes to get home in the US
- The constant challenges - nothing is ever easy
- Rotating stock outs in the stores - you never know how long something will be available
- Having to go to several stores to find what you need
- Having to go to duty free stores for affordable wine and liquor, but these stores aren't always open and there is always a limit on how much you can buy

What I am looking forward to...
- Fresh air!
- Change of seasons
- The ease of living in the US
- No real traffic in Chapel Hill!
- You can find everything you need in just one store (OMG - Greatland Target I love you!)
- Seeing my family often, talking to them any time of day
- Road trips
- Staying in one place - making friends who most likely won't be moving away
- Owning a house and making it ours
- Driving. Driving on big wide roads without food carts, motorcycles, and too many cars crowding them
- Bike rides
- Hikes, camping

I thought I would write a list of what I'm not looking forward to about America, but I think I should end on a high note! Plus what I love about living here is pretty much the antithesis of what I don't like about the US.

We are one day into packing up our house. The house is more than half boxed and reality has set in with a huge shove forward! Definitely no turning back now!

Home sweet home

2011-06-05T17:24:00.000+07:00

J and I bought a house last month! We are now two weeks away from officially owning a home again, this time in Chapel Hill, North Carolina.

In 7 days I saw over 30 houses so I feel confident in our decision to purchase this house, although poor J flew in on a Thursday night, saw 6 of my top houses on Friday, and then we put in the offer on Saturday. For him it feels impulsive, but he is happy with the house too. In many ways it is a house I dream of owning. It is a house I will be happy to raise our children in. It is a house I can easily imagine sharing with dinner and house guests, full of laughter, kids running around, chinking wine glasses. The house looks like The American Dream.

The inside is contemporary, bright and airy. There is a beautiful screened porch opening off of the family room and I know those doors will be open at all possible times. The kitchen is also gorgeous, although I am worried about it being too small. And there are 6 bedrooms. I'm feeling a bit ridiculous saying that - our house has 6 bedrooms!?! And I am definitely worried about cleaning this large house! But it is beautiful, and we will have plenty of space to live in for many, many years to come.

The house is on a cul-de-sac on .25 acres. There is a beautiful backyard with a great jungle gym for the kids, and from what I hear there are lots of kids in the neighborhood. Our neighborhood is located adjacent to a large housing development that has several playgrounds, a community swimming pool, and a small town area with restaurants, grocery store, pediatrician offices, cafes, and boutiques which are all within walking distance of our house. I was hoping for exactly this and can't wait to walk over with the kids for coffee and treats!

We are excited. We are nervous. We are crazy stressed. We are anxious. We are curious. We are uncertain. We are expectant. We are hopeful.

The next two weeks will be absolutely insane! But at the end of it we will be back in the US and own a lovely new home!

Kool Kalimantan

2011-04-16T22:46:00.000+07:00

As our time in Indonesia draws to a close, we are furiously trying to fit in all the last minute, must see trips before we leave Asia. A few weeks ago we went to Phuket, Thailand, which to be honest was a disappointment. I don't see what all the fuss is about. I love Thailand, but I'd much rather go back to Koh Samui for a beautiful beach vacation or go to Chang Mai.

This past weekend, however, we went on a fabulous and comfortably adventurous trip to central Kalimantan! By Indonesian standards it was an expensive trip, but it was well worth all those millions of rupiahs! The flight from Jakarta to Palangkaraya was only 1.5 hours, and aside from the Lion Air pilot once again landing us hard upon touch down (seems to be a trend with Lion Air...), it was an easy get away from Jakarta. We went Thursday night and stayed at the Luwansa Hotel so that we would already be there Friday morning to get on the boat. The Luwansa Hotel was surprisingly nice - a very clean, comfortable and decent place to spend one short night.

The next morning we were picked up a bit late from the hotel (car problems they said) but then arrived a short 15-20 minutes later at the port which I assume was in the old part of town. We were greeted at once by an Indonesian woman speaking perfect English - Aini - and were welcomed on a gorgeous wooden house boat called the Rahai'i Pangun. We were taken to our comfortable cabins and shown a map of our route which would take us up the Rungan River past 3 orangutan reserves. As soon as the other tourists (an American couple living in Jakarta) arrived we shipped out! We drank coffee and ate some Indonesian snacks as we floated by the busy river life of Palangkaraya.

We spent the next four hours or so slowly making our way up the river, passing a few small villages in the midst of miles of jungle. At one point we asked how isolated a certain village was, as it seemed to us we were in the middle of nowhere. Much to our surprise we were just 15 km from Palangkaraya by road! So while our whole river cruise felt very "adventurous" and "isolated", surrounded by what felt like miles and miles of jungle and small river ways, it turns out we were never more than 50 minutes from Palangkaraya! During our whole 2 day trip; however, we never passed another boat full of tourists, and were instead treated to fishermen in small canoes, small villages full of waving children, quiet river jungle and mangrove forests, and of course orangutans!

The orangutan reserves are managed by the Borneo Orangutan Survival Foundation (BOSF), which is an organization that has been rescuing orangutans from illegal captivity or loss of habitat since 1991. Their mission is to Rescue, Rehabilitate, and Release orangutans from around Borneo. The reserves that we visited are where the orangutans are being rehabilitated - learning to fend for themselves in a safe jungle environment. Most of the orangutans were rescued from captivity where they most likely lived since they were young, so they never learned how to live in the jungle. BOSF teaches them how to do that, first at "Forest School" and then later at these reservations. We visited the Nyaru Menteng location in Central Kalimantan.

After a delicious lunch on the boat we soon arrived at our first orangutan island. Straight away we spotted a few orangutans up in the trees, and all of us crowded to the back of the boat to get the best view. We stopped nearby and readied ourselves to get in canoes in order to get closer to the orangutans and then continue on a canoe trip through the smaller river ways. The big boat wasn't allowed to get too close to the island, but canoes can get closer so we all piled ourselves into the canoes and were paddled the short distance to the island.

At one point there were about 4 orangutans on the ground near the shore, where the feeding spot was located. They were gorgeous! Even the boys had their eyes glued to them, as I continuously experimented with my camera trying to get "national geographic shots" in low light, with a telephoto lens, balancing on a rocky canoe! I took over 350 photos over 2 days, and fortunately I believe I managed a few good ones.

Once our appetite for Orangutan gazing was satisfied we took off on our canoe ride. What we thought was to be a short ride through the small water ways turned into a 2 hour long voyage. By the time we found our big boat dusk was well upon us and the rain clouds were threatening. The first hour of the trip was lovely though - cruising through jungle encroached river tributaries, mangrove forests and black water lakes (from the peat of the soil). It was completely quiet except for some bird and insect chatter, and the only hint of civilization we saw was a few fishermen shacks.

As can only happen in a 2 hour long canoe ride, our 4 year old grew restless and began the constant barrage of "when are we there...?? (whine whine) where is our boat...?? (whine whine)". We did the best we could with LC while J and I simultaneously mouthed to each other "oh my aching back...! (whine whine) oh my sore butt...! (whine whine) where is our boat...?? (whine whine)". As the sun went down and the clouds grew darker I must admit to a creeping fear as well - what if our canoe capsized here in the middle of nowhere?! The thought hadn't crossed my mind until everything grew more ominous with the approaching night. Finally, we spotted the boat and we all cheered - our guide was also very happy to have finally arrived! Evidently there was a gold mining platform blocking the way that our big boat wanted to take to meet us, so it had to go farther up river than originally planned. We had made it safely, with just an aching back and bum to complain of, and with beautiful scenery to remember.

Our first night we parked near the side of the river, enjoyed another delicious meal, and listened to the rain overhead. Thankfully we tucked in early to bed as the jungle and our own little monkeys woke us up at 5:30 the next morning. We had a lazy morning as the boat paddled up to a larger village where we picked up another few passengers. We then headed to a second orangutan island and once again enjoyed watching them eat and swing from the branches.

After lunch we headed to a dayak village where we were entertained with a welcoming dance and music by some of the village children. After a little while LC got bored and wandered off towards some other kids and started making friends. He and C were definitely big hits in the village and were basically treated like rock stars. I'm sure they don't have many foreign kids visiting their village and they were a novelty. But they had fun and we enjoyed learning a bit about dayak culture and about life in the village.

After we left the village the boat found a spot to park for the night and we were treated to another great meal and stayed up a while chatting with our boat mates. We went to bed early again as we knew it would be another early morning and we had to get off the boat to catch our flight back to Jakarta.

In the morning we realized they had parked us right beside another orangutan island, and were delighted that we got to see another couple orangutans before leaving Kalimantan. We were happy we were able to see a mom with her baby at the first island, and then were able to see another one in the morning before leaving.

All in all it was a really great trip - easy flight out of Jakarta and everything was so well organized. Plus the boat was very nice, the food was great, the guide was very informative, and best of all we saw some amazing orangutans in Kalimantan!

A foodie I'm not, but just the same

2011-03-28T16:59:00.001+07:00

Here is a post that I started last year, and just now finished. If you're feeling adventurous in the kitchen, here are some good recipes to try!

I realize that I've been remiss in writing very much on Indonesian culture, as most of the time I blog I am writing about a trip we took or about the boys. Both are worthwhile I think, but I'm sure you, kind reader, would also like to learn more about Indonesia! So with that, I am going to write about food, since so much of our lives (for good or bad) and our cultures are wrapped up in food. Now those of you who know me know that I am not a 'foodie' - I am not 'into' food, I do not like to cook, and there are many meals I'd prefer to just be able to inject into my body rather than sit down for. However, I do appreciate a good meal and recognize what a significant role it plays in a country's culture.

Indonesia is such a vast country and is made up of so many different peoples, that its food also varies depending on the region. There are Javanese dishes, Manodonese, Balinese, Sumatran, etc. and while all are typically Indonesian (meaning they share many qualities and are very different from say Mexican, Italian, Indian, Japanese, etc.) they also differ enough that many Indonesians can tell where a particular dish is from within Indonesia by simply looking at it or with a quick taste. For a very good explanation of Indonesian food, please visit this link. One significant difference is what sort of meat is used because most Indonesians are Muslim and so do not cook with pork. Bali on the other hand, being a mostly Hindu island, freely uses pork in many dishes as well as duck which is very popular (a well known and delicious Balinese dish is called Bebek Betutu). Regional dishes also differ on the amount and kind of chiles they use. In general Indonesians like some heat in their dishes (they also love sweet and fried foods), but the Manadonese are known for their extremely spicey dishes. I am sorry to say I'm a bit of a chile wimp, and so I've never tried Manadonese food, but this is what I've heard.

We are fortunate to be living in a foreign country whose food is delicious (NOT the case when we lived in W. Africa). My favorite dish is called Nasi Kuning (yellow rice) and Tempeh (a variant of tofu) Orek. It is a fairly common dish in Java but usually prepared for celebrations. The nasi kuning is made with tumeric, lemongrass and coconut milk, so it has a nice, but subtle flavor. The tempeh orek on the other hand is fabulously flavorful - a wonderful mixture of sweet, salty, and spicey. It is sprinkled on top of the rice dish and the balance of flavors is divine.

Another popular dish, which I believe is found everywhere in Indonesia, is nasi goreng or mie goreng, which is simply fried rice or fried noodles. Most restaurants or cooks will add in ingredients to make nasi/mie goreng more interesting, such as carrots, shrimp, chicken or beef, chilies, peanuts, or egg. It is a basic dish that is difficult to mess up, and since it is fried it is one of the safest dishes to order in even the most basic of eateries.

I love a good peanut sauce, which I quickly grew to appreciate in Mali as it was one of the few appealing dishes among their traditional food. Because Mali is so poor, too often the peanut sauce, called tigadigana, is watered down. However, if you stumble upon a good tigadigana, it is heavenly. I looked on the internet for recipes but only found tigedigena recipes on blog sites - I suppose that isn't surprising. This recipe looks good, although I've never heard of adding broccoli to tigedigena. I don't remember ever even seeing broccoli in the whole country! Here is another recipe for tigadigana, along with a wonderful description of just how awful the food in Mali can be. But I, like this blog author, learned to appreciate what you learn from forcing down food you don't love - the simple fact that you have food to eat to keep you from starving, the quiet beauty of eating with people - whether they be friends or strangers, the importance of kindness in smiling at your hosts despite your discomfort, etc. (But I have led us on a tangent...) You can also find great peanut sauces in Indonesia, for example to accompany gado gado, which is cooked and raw vegetables dipped in peanut sauce, or satay, which is any grilled meat on skewers, but most often chicken or beef, covered in peanut sauce. Both are often served with krupuk, which are similar to shrimp crackers.

Another delicious and popular Indonesian dish is rendang, usually beef rendang, which is beef cooked in coconut milk and spices such as ginger, turmeric leaf, lemongrass and chilies. Many Indonesian curry dishes are incorrectly called rendang, for true rendang requires hours of cooking whereby the liquid sauce is cooked down to a paste, or disappears completely to make a dry beef rendang. Because of the long cooking time required, it isn't common to find true rendang in restaurants. But when you do, it is well worth it! Here is a good looking beef rendang recipe (I haven't tried it). Like I said, it's a long process so perhaps it's best to try on a cold rainy Saturday or Sunday!

I would be remiss if I didn't talk about sambal, which is Indonesia's basic chili sauce. You will find it in the grocery stores in the ketchup aisle and it is always served in restaurants along with the ketchup (fortunately it is a lighter red color so I don't confuse them too often!). It has a nice flavor and adds some heat, if needed. Hand made sambal is even better though, with more texture and richer flavors. While my husband still contends that I can't handle any spice, I beg to differ and think that living in Indonesia has heightened my tolerance for spicy hot foods and has taught me how to enjoy its flavor.

Indonesian food is flavorful and exotic and delicious, so give it a try if you haven't before! Here's hoping we find a good Indonesian restaurant in the Triangle!

The Messy Details

2011-03-20T16:02:00.002+07:00

I've lived overseas several times before this, and I've loved all of those amazing experiences. Each one has been radically different, and this experience is no exception. Two of the biggest differences with the move to Indonesia was moving overseas as a family, and moving overseas with so many belongings. Every other time I've "moved", it's just been me - simply me and the 2 suitcases and 1 carry-on luggage + purse allowed. So it was a huge jump to go from 1 adult to 2 adults and 2 kids, and from airplane luggage to cargo container!

For my own selfish reasons (tools to de-stress) and hoping you may be interested in knowing just what craziness is in store for us over the next 5 months, I'm going to share with you my to-do list. :)

-Research Chapel Hill neighborhoods and schools
-Look at houses online (this I admit is a joy - I happily spend hours at this!)
-Make plane and hotel reservations for our 3 final trips in Asia (also obviously fun but a lot of work)
-Contact a realtor, get pre-approval for a mortgage, etc.
-Research type of car to buy
-Research, decide on and sign the boys up for summer camp
-Research, decide on and sign LC up for pre-school
-Make plane, hotel, and rental car reservations for house hunting trip
-Get power of attorney for friend in Jakarta while we're away on house hunting trip
-Travel to CH on house hunting trip
-Look at dozens of houses and buy a house!
-Find out what our shipment allowance is
-Moving company to house to provide estimate
-Do an inventory of our house belongings with photos
-Decide what we will sell here and for how much
-Sell said belongings
-Sell our car here, transfer title
-Get a few final pieces of furniture made here
-Reserve a serviced apartment for the weeks in Chapel Hill while we wait for our shipment to arrive
-Make plane reservations for move back home
-Research and complete documents for moving cat home with us
-Get medical, dental and vet records
-Get school records from JIS and TT
-Print photos and get framed
-Make photo albums
-Write recommendation letters and find staff new jobs
-Decide summer trip plans and make US internal plane reservations (haven't seen the parents, aka grandparents for 1 year!)

Oh my god this list is making me ill...but it continues.

-Organize our going away party
-Cancel cable, utilities, final lease inspection or whatever, etc.
-Make a hotel reservation for last few nights in Jakarta while house is packed up
-Make car rental reservation for first few days in CH
-Cancel car insurance
-Sign up for health insurance for US
-Cancel gym membership
-Cancel J's cell phone
-Get exit-only permit to leave the country
-Decide what luggage we will carry on the plane home (what we will need with us for next 6 weeks)
-Packers come to house for 3 days - chaos!
-Final haircut, pedi and mani, massage and facial (but of course!)
-Say goodbye to our friends and wonderful staff (NOT looking forward to that one!)
-35 hours getting home - 2 adults, 2 kids and 1 cat
-exhausted and bleary eyed, arrival at RDU (oh my god!), pick up rental car and go to temporary lodgings
-Buy a car
-Close on house
-Register C for school
-What needs to be done to the house? I don't know yet, but I'm sure there will be something - organize it!
-Ah, sign up for cell phone plan
-Set up utilities, cable, internet, etc. for new house
-Kids and I go visit the grandparents
-Return to CH, packers come and unload the boxes
-Kids spend days in summer camp and I unpack the boxes in our new home!
-Kids start school and we begin a whole new chapter!

Whew, I feel like I just ran a marathon in my brain. Maybe I shouldn't have just written this all out, it's making me even MORE STRESSED! Whew, take deep breaths, take deep breaths, it will all work out...

Anyone need a stiff drink??

Review of 16 months

2011-03-13T18:59:00.002+07:00

I won't attempt a full recap of the last 16 months - if I did this resurrection would never happen! But I will give a brief overview.

I left off in Nov. 2009 (!!). January 2010 felt like a big month. We went to Malaysia for a week and had a nice time. When we came back C seemed to go through a major developmental spurt. Within 2 weeks he began swimming like a fish, riding his bike with no training wheels, and reading. It was really incredible, and very exciting! Then my mom and her good friend A (my adopted aunt) came to visit. We had a fabulous time exploring Jakarta and then the 3 of us went for a whole week to Bali and Gili Trawangan. A whole week! Yes, I left my hubby and kids in Jakarta while I went traveling with my mom and great friend and it was marvelous!

In March my dad came for his first visit to Jakarta - yeah! Again, we had a great time. We went to the national mosque in Jakarta for Friday afternoon prayers which was really interesting. The whole family went to Bali and J, my dad and I played golf at Nirwana golf course - gorgeous!

In May we potty trained LC and it went very well. It went well until June when we went back to the US for the summer. And then we had some steps backward, forwards, sideways, and it basically took months of hell until just last month (yes, 10 months folks, I'm not happy) when I feel I can now confidently say he is potty trained. I won't go into the stinky details, I will spare you, but there really were a few horrible months when we thought he might have a medical condition that could last for years (sometimes the internet is a bad place to spend time). Anyway though, we did have a fantastic time in the US - spent a few days in Baltimore and then 1 week at a beautiful cabin in W. VA with Jon's family and our DC friends, and then 3 weeks in WI.

In August LC started back at preschool with the 3 year old class and C started first grade. It was a harder transition for C than I thought it would be. I thought kindergarten would be the toughest transition, but 1st grade is evidently more serious, because C would come home regularly and complain that school is so booorrriiinngg! It took about 4 months before he stopped saying that. In September we took an adventurous trip to Flores island and Komodo national park. We hiked Rinca and Komodo islands to see the only home of Komodo dragons in the wild, sailed around some of the most gorgeous scenery I've ever seen, and did some of the best snorkeling I'd ever done (and C's first time!).

C and I took a quick trip to Singapore in November to visit friends and go to Universal Studios. It was really fun to go on a trip just the 2 of us! And then for Christmas we went to Melbourne! It was the first time I'd been back since living there as an exchange student when I was 16. It was incredible and I'm very happy we did it! We stayed with my host family and I became reacquainted with my neighborhood there and saw a friend from my high school. We then went to Hamilton Island, Queensland (lovely!) and I snorkeled in the Great Barrier Reef (a life long dream!). We ended our trip in Sydney and then flew back to Jakarta in 2011. In February we went to Manado, N. Sulawesi with 5 other families and had a wonderful time catching up with friends and seeing about 100 wild dolphins (amazing!!).

When we got back I started doing a short term work assignment which has been very interesting and has kept my mind off of the move, which is a good thing at the moment. I'm also happy to fill up my CV a bit with more maternal and child health work. I am busy planning our final trips before we leave this part of the world (Phuket, Kalimantan, Gili T. again), and preparing myself for a lot of moving tasks in the near future.

The boys are good. They are full-of-it boys in the most delightful and wonderful and of course sometimes most monstrous of ways. C is very smart and is the sweetest kid when he's not being totally silly. C seems to take after his father and is excelling in math, and is also doing well with reading. I love listening to him read. My son reads!! I just think that's the coolest thing ever. He did soccer and t-ball this school year and enjoyed them both, although we think t-ball may be more his pace. He is now doing tae kwon do and I finally got to watch him the other day and he's quite good - hopefully he'll stick with it. He loves to spend hours outside playing with all the children in our complex, riding his bike, playing soccer, chasing girls (already!), and playing with whatever toys are the flavor of the day. He is still a good drawer and I think he has my mom's talent, but right now he's too busy being 6 to spend much time drawing. His music teacher tells us he has good rhythm so hopefully he'll take up an instrument (I'm hoping for the guitar) in the near future. He keeps trying to convince me that he's going to be a motorcycle racer when he grows up, but I usually ignore him because that must be a mother's worst nightmare of a profession. Hopefully this will not stick!

And LC, well, he's 3. And he's good at it. He plays hard and he sleeps hard. I've always said he is a very full-on kid - when he does something or acts a certain way, he does it to full capacity. As my father says, he is a joy to be with. He is a very happy kid who loves to smile and laugh and play, he is social and smart and rascally. And when he's awful, he does that full-on too. He is very stubborn and very independent. We lost him twice when we were in Australia (fortunately for only a few minutes, but it's scary to lose a 3 year old when you're near water!), and several other times he just plain walked in the totally opposite direction from all of us because that's the way he wanted to go. He likes to write letters and has started drawing a lot. He likes to play soccer and do tae kwon do like his big brother - he pretty much likes anything that C likes. He has lots of girlfriends in the complex, both younger and older. I have little doubt that both my boys will do well with the ladies. :)

So that has been our life for the last 16 months in a very small nutshell. It's been a very fun and eventful 16 months, and I'm sorry I haven't been sharing!

Resurrection

2011-03-09T20:00:00.001+07:00

Ha, seriously?!

I don't even know what to say, where to begin. I mean, it's been 16 months - why? what? how?! I never actually meant to stop writing, it just happened. One day turned into one week which turned into one month which evidently turned into one year and then some. And leaving it like I did, well it has just never sat well with me and so here I am. I think I just became bored of sitting in front of the computer so much, and so by the time I got back to writing all I wrote about were the trips I had recently gone on. And this is ok, but this blog wasn't meant to be a travelog exclusively. It is meant to be more than that. And so between not wanting to sit in front of the computer, not wanting to write a travelog, not wanting to feel like it was boring, I just stopped. Cold turkey stopped.

But now I'm back. At least I think I'm back, I'm intending to be back! I guess we'll see how it goes, but I have thought a lot about it. I considered starting it back up at the one year mark of when I stopped, but that didn't happen. Obviously. But I've continued to think about it a lot, and feel that it might just be the right time. I've had a lot on my mind, and so for selfish reasons I feel I need an outlet for all the thoughts, emotions, plans, and stress stirring around inside me.

You see, we're on our way out. Our wonderful, fabulous life in Indonesia is coming to a close, and since I began this journey with you all I feel I should end it with you all as well. Plus, with all that's entailed with a move of this magnitude, my brain is all jumbled up and maybe this will ease some of the craziness.

In a little over 3 months from now we will move back to the US, to Chapel Hill, NC, where we lived from 2001-2003 while I studied for my MPH. We thought we'd relocate to another overseas post or we'd move back to Washington, DC, so this comes as a bit of a surprise to us. We were disappointed that we are going back home to the US instead of to Africa where we hoped to go, and then disappointed we wouldn't go home home to DC. However, we always knew CH was a possibility since J's company is headquartered in the Triangle. Now that we've wrapped our heads around it we're excited, very excited, so excited that we're very antsy to leave Jakarta. And by the time I post this we will have told our friends in CH and I know this will make us even more excited.

We only have 3 months left. 3 MONTHS! Yikes. We have A LOT to do in that time - moving a family overseas is not an easy thing to put together, even when moving back to your home country. Matter of fact, in some ways it's even harder, and I'll write a post on that another time.

So for the next few months I'll be writing a lot about the move and what I'm feeling as we prepare to leave Indonesia and repatriate to the US. And once I'm back, a friend suggested that I keep it going because really, how interesting and funny will it be to go from my spoiled expat life here in a developing country to my full-time stay at home mom life in the "developed" US. Funny in a pathetic way that is. So that's the intention. Again, we'll see how I go...

So, again, sorry about the long and unexpected hiatus, but hopefully you're willing to start checking in with me again from time to time...

The Liquid of the Gods

2009-11-19T16:53:00.002+07:00

This year I finally got around to joining the Indonesia Heritage Society, something I've been meaning to do since before we even moved here. They do a range of activities, including consulting with and giving tours of the National Museum, sponsoring a variety of lectures and study groups on some aspect of Indonesia, and organizing Explorer groups which explore places in and around Jakarta. I joined one of the Explorer groups, and now every other week a couple of the members organize a tour for the group to visit and experience something new about Indonesia.

Two weeks ago we went to the home of an Indian woman who has lived in Jakarta for 20 years. She owns a very good Indian restaurant nearby and loves to cook. She taught the group about different spices used in Indonesia and taught us 3 different Indonesian recipes (see a future post for more details).

Yesterday our tour was at the Equil Mineral Water bottleing plant. The factory is located at the base of Mt. Salak, about 1.5 hour drive from Jakarta. The drive there was typical of life on Java - constant traffic and end to end towns. But once we arrived at our destination we found peace, quiet and beauty - not something you'd typically find at a factory! The surrounding grounds of the bottling center were really lush and serene, in keeping with the equilibrium of their product. The factory was actually quite small. Most of the space was filled with cartons of water, while the space for bottling took up just 1/5 of the warehouse. It was immacutely clean and spacious, and the workers all wore gloves, masks and hairnets. The bottles and caps are sterilized and the room in which the water is bottled was a grade 3 clean room (or something like that) - meaning they had 2 separate disinfecting rooms leading to the bottling room, similar to a surgery room.

The main reception hall is of European design made of marble and filled with art. In front of the hall is a beautiful Koi fish pond filled with mineral water from the source (probably some of the most expensive and healthiest fish anywhere!). After the factory tour they gave us a presentation on mineral water and how Equil compares to other brands. I had not known beforehand that the term "mineral water" is a very select and protected description for water. In order for a brand to describe their water as "mineral water", they have to meet 4 criteria as set out by Codex, a joint standard as adopted by EU countries, WHO and FAO. The criteria for natural mineral water (as distinguished from any other drinking water) is that:
1) It comes from a natural spring source or a bored hole
2) It fulfills the Codex's criteria from the physical, chemical and microbiological points of view
3) It does not undergo any treatment except carbonation
4) It is bottled at the source

The water used in Equil mineral water is from an aquifer 80 meters underground that is fed from rain coming through Mt. Salak. The water is 150 years old and is not pumped to the surface, but comes up naturally. They don't treat the water in any way (except for carbonation for their sparkling water) and it is bottled at the source, so it meets the Codex criteria. During the presentation we also learned about the different mineral contents of popular mineral water brands. For example, Perrier used to be (I don't know how they corrected this if it's not allowed to be treated) very high in nitrates, which can cause cancer or Blue Baby Syndrome in babies and small children. Many of the mineral water brands are bottled in Europe. But when thinking about how heavily farmed Europe is and the wars that have been fought on that land (resulting in higher nitrate content and other pollutants), I wonder if drinking European mineral water would be so safe considering that it hasn't been treated. Equil marketers are finding it difficult to open up international markets for their brand because it is from Indonesia, which is considered in the world to be "dirtier". But really, perhaps Indonesian mineral water would actually be safer than any other brand!

I also don't think often about the taste of water, unless it's very noticeable. We do not drink tap water here as it's not safe enough, instead we buy the Aqua brand bottled water (owned by Danone). During the presentation they had us do a taste test between Equil and Aqua. I was very surprised at what a huge difference there was! Equil had a far smoother and slightly sweet taste to it, whereas Aqua had a less pleasing taste and even had a bit of an after taste. Now we're not going to change brands as it would just be too expensive to use only Equil water; however, I did end up buying 6 cartons of their sparkling water (I have had it before several times in restaurants so I already knew I liked it).

Another interesting thing about this company is the mystic beliefs of the owner. He used a shaman to help him find the water source and consulted a Feng Shui expert in designing the facilities. The water source is located next to the main building and has been decorated with a satue and stepping stones over the bubbling brook, as well as a Hindu type open air enclosure. The tour guide explained that many people have felt something especially "spiritual" or different when walking through the Hindu enclosure, or when drinking straight from the source. I have to say it did feel different to me - the air felt heavier and my heart sped up a little. So maybe there is a spirit protecting the water!

It was thoroughly enjoyable tour and I was impressed with the company and the facilities, and best of all their water tastes great! The owner plans to build villas nearby for natural living and an escape from our current hectic life styles - maybe we'll be here long enough to enjoy it.

Around the world with a conversation

2009-11-05T20:34:00.002+07:00

I took some time the other day to scan my favorite blogs and explore new ones and I found a whole list of blogs written by expats living in Indonesia. Many of them wrote about the bombing that occured here in Jakarta in July, and when writing about it all of them expressed their deep sadness for the expats and Indonesians who were harmed in the tragic event, and their own bafflement at this horrendous act and their deep love of this country.

Their writings and conversations made me think back to the conversations I've had over the years with fellow Americans and people from many different countries and the profound sharing of our lives and our cultures that is involved. In particular I thought about my experience as a Peace Corps volunteer (PCV) in Mali, W. Africa from 1996-98 . This was a seminal experience of my life, an adventure that introduced me to my beloved husband, career and Africa. Every PCV embarks on their journey with a specific Peace Corps assigned job - for example I was tasked to be a "natural resources management extension agent" (yes, quite a mouthful!). Many PCVs also take on secondary projects because either they are interested in them or they are asked by their community to help in that way. My secondary project was to work with the village midwife, which is how I became interested in my current career of public health. The work PCVs do is the first of three goals of Peace Corps, which is to "help the people of interested countries in meeting their need for trained men and women."

I've always considered this goal to be very important of course; however, it is really the second and third goals of Peace Corps which I believe to be the most significant. These two goals (to educate foreigners about America and to educate Americans about foreigners/foreign countries) address the idea of cross-cultural awareness and the sharing of experiences and values and beliefs among people from different countries. I believe most returned PCVs have found the most meaning and the most enduring benefit of Peace Corps to be this sharing and education that they have both received and given. As a matter of fact, many exchange programs, such as AFS, were established in order to heal the wounds of war and to prevent future wars from starting. After all, when you know and love a person from a foreign country, war and strife in their country becomes profoundly personal. If more Americans had know more Iraqis, would we have let Bush invade their country? Maybe not. If more Americans knew more Sudanese and Somalis, would we continue to do virtually nothing? Again, maybe not.

Sometimes I've been surprised by the effects that these cross-cultural exchanges can have, or how long they can last. I have relationships with foreigners that have lasted decades and I suspect will last forever. We share a love for global travel and new experiences, and have shared special moments in eachothers' lives which will never be lost. And it is amazing the effect a person can have on another's ideas about a whole country, either for good or for bad. And coming home from my adventures has been an educational experience as well. It has given me an opportunity to see my home country with new eyes, to enable me to be more open-minded about its flaws and to appreciate its beauties. I also learned more about my own family from these absences, and how their deep interest and insightful questions made me realize how much they care for me and how interested in the world they truly are.

Traveling the world is an amazing opportunity that I cherish on a regular basis. It reminds me just how harsh and how lovely people can be, and how different we are but moreso how similar we are no matter where we are from. It provides the most amazing opportunities, and I believe the best education a person can gain is through global travel. I feel blessed that my sons are experiencing life in a different country, and pray that they these benefits will last a life time.

Sa wat dii kha, Thailand!

2009-10-31T16:15:00.001+07:00

In September we went for a palace gazing, suntanning, eating infused week in Thailand. And it was lovely.

Last year we celebrated (albeit in a totally non-Muslim way) the end of Ramadan by staying in Jakarta, which was actually quite relaxing. There was no one here, the streets were empty, so the pollution magically departed with all the cars and people and we were left with sunny skies and quiet - quite a change for Jakarta! However, it was also a little depressing because all of our friends were off enjoying some wild adventure while we stayed here. So this year I really wanted to get out of dodge, and since Thailand has been at the top of our list for years that is where we headed.

We spent the first 4 nights of our trip in Bangkok. I was there in 2008 for a work conference, but I only saw a little bit of the city. The first thing you notice about Thailand is that you've arrived in a whole different class of place compared to much of Asia, certainly compared to Indonesia! The airport is modern and sparkly and huge, as if to puff out its chest with the knowledge that it is a regional hub. Continuing with its modernity is a fast, well built highway into town. Maybe because we're not used to reaching such high speeds here in Jakarta, or maybe because our taxi driver really was a bit of a maniac, but both J and I were holding on tight to our seats the whole way into town. So...maybe it's a good thing that we can't go so fast in Jakarta.

I had received a recommendation from a friend to stay at the President Park Suites while in Bangkok, as it was inexpensive and spacious. We had a huge 2 bedroom apartment for about $100/night, which included breakfast and a tuk-tuk shuttle to the nearest sky train station. It was very nicely appointed and evidently quite a find (2 other guests asked us how we found out about it).

The morning after we arrived we set off to see the Grand Palace. Much to the pleasure of the boys, we decided to take several different modes of transportation to get there: tuk-tuk, skytrain (a notable difference being the seats nearest the doors have a sign posted requesting those seats be reserved for monks), and finally river boat taxi. The boat taxi took us down the dirty Mae Nam Chao Phraya river, past some small houses and hotels and a few impressive temples, to where we exited for the palace. Wat Phra Kaew (Temple of the Emerald Buddha) and the Grand Palace house a series of strikingly beautiful buildings, murals, statues, and grounds that are, well, fit for a king. The decoration on the outside of these buildings is incredibly intricate and spectacular, it is inspiring to imagine the amount of time it took to adorn these structures. We spent the whole morning wandering through the palace grounds until we knew the children were about to disown us. So off we went to lunch (I had a surprisingly good Thai meal at a nondescript restaurant by the pier) and then a taxi ride back to the hotel for LC's nap.

That evening we fed the boys and put them to bed and then left them with a babysitter (J, being the worry wort that he is, almost convinced himself that our sweet petite Thai babysitter was going to steal them while we were gone). J has a friend in Bangkok so we went out on the town with him. Our first stop was dinner at Cabbages & Condoms, a somewhat famous landmark in Bangkok. The restaurant was conceptualized to both promote family planning and to generate income to support various development activities in Thailand. All the flowers in the restaurant were made out of condoms, as well as a few "condom superhero" statues. The food was good and it was a fun experience, and all for a good cause! After dinner we headed to Patpong, Bangkok's famous red light district. We went to watch one of the famous Ping Pong shows. If you don't know what I'm referring to I'd rather not explain it on this mostly family-friendly site. I will just say that it was certainly an "interesting" show, J was very disappointed but we're glad we did it, and I doubt we'll ever do it again.

On our final day in Bangkok we hired a tour guide through Chang Thai Travel to take us to Damnoen Saduak, a floating market about 100 km from Bangkok. We aren't typically people who hire tour guides, as we enjoy just wandering at our own pace and know we'll remember very little from a tour anyway. However, on this trip we didn't want to hassle with transportation difficulties and didn't want to have to deal with figuring out what we're supposed to do. It was a bit pricey, but we're glad we organized the tour. A comfortable air conditioned bus picked us up from the hotel and a very nice lady who spoke pretty good English (both J and I were surprised that the Thais don't speak better English since it's such a popular tourist destination point and is a regional hub) provided us with good information about the sites we passed and where we went. On our way to the floating market we made a stop at a sugar cane plantation. They demonstrated how the sugar cane is produced, and let us taste this wonderful caramelized candy they make from the sugar cane. And of course we made the mandatory stop at a craft shop, which was full of tourists and random trinkets from Thailand.

Finally we arrived at a small "port" beside a canal, seemingly in the middle of nowhere. We quickly boarded a long boat for a ride through the canals, passing rice fields and river houses along the way. It was very interesting to have a glimpse of life on the water...the front doors of all the houses faced the canal and all had some sort of pier for people to dock their boats. There were several general stores along the canal that also faced the canal, as arriving by boat is the main way to approach the shops. The we arrived into "town" - the main market area that is built along the canals. While you can access the shops from land, the main way is definitely by boat. There are shops built on land, but there are also women selling produce and snacks in boats tied up to the piers. There was abundant color and activity and it was a lot of fun!

The following day we returned to the airport to take our Bangkok Air flight to Ko Samui island, which is on the Eastern side of the Thai peninsula. We also considered going to Phuket or Krabi on the Western side, but because we went during the rainy season we heard the Eastern side is drier. I think we made a good decision as it only rained twice while we were in Thailand and both times was at night. The flight down to Ko Samui was an easy 1 hour, and Bangkok Air was great for a budget airline (they fed us and gave the boys nice toys!). We had learned beforehand (I love Trip Advisor!) that taxis on the island were expensive so we were prepared. We were able to bargain only a little though, so our 10 minute drive to our hotel was still far overpriced.

Ko Samui is a fairly big island so there are many different places on the beach to choose from. I spent quite a bit of time on Trip Advisor and Lonely Planet trying to decide which beach would be best for our family. I finally decided on Choeng Mon beach, which turned out to be a perfect decision! I can't imagine a better beach for a family with young children. It was very quiet (maybe even quieter than usual since it was low season) with very few hawkers. The sand was soft and very clean, and the water was clear and very shallow and calm. It was beautiful and peaceful and perfect! The boys had such a great time playing in the sand and the shallow water, and we had such a nice relaxing time watching them and reading! There were only a few hotels on the beach (none of them big high rises), as well as a few beach front restaurants. We ate fresh seafood on the beach a couple times, and enjoyed the quietly lapping waves. I also had a couple massages on the beach which were wonderful.

The hotel we stayed in was very interesting. It's called the Imperial Boat House and all the suites are located in these old rice barges that have been converted to hotel rooms. There was a porch and living room upstairs, and a bathroom, sitting room and bedroom downstairs. It was a bit old and the bathroom could use remodeling, but there was plenty of space for us and it was "fun"! There are also 2 nice swimming pools for when we wanted an alternative to the beach.

One day we rented a car to drive around the island. We drove the whole circumference so we were able to really see that we picked the perfect place to stay. We drove through Chaweng town/beach, which is the major beach on the island. We didn't see the beach, but the town was pretty awful - totally overbuilt and crowded and probably very noisy during peak seasons. We drove to the southern part of the island to a hilly area where they had elephant trekking. J and C got up on one elephant and LC and I on another, and then we walked through the forest for about 1/2 hour. This was my first time ever riding an elephant so I thought it was pretty neat! As is often the case for C and LC though, they're too young to know that this is actually a very special experience! Their view of normal is going to be so warped after living in Asia for so many years! After our elephant trek we tried to find a waterfall, but after hiking up with the boys for 20 minutes, with no idea how much longer it would be, we decided to turn back. En route back to the hotel we found a British pub to have lunch. It was a cute place facing the water, but unfortunately their burgers were disappointing.

That night we headed to Hat Bo Phut for dinner. It used to be a fishing village that has been transformed into a trendy little area filled with boutiques and restaurants. It was very cute with many great options for dinner. We decided on a sweet little Italian place facing the water, and although we had a good time J and I wished we had had some couples time. It would have been a fun area to go out in and have some time together. But oh well!

All in all it was a great trip and I'd love to return to Thailand again some day. I'd like to see Krabi (which is supposed to be breathtakingly gorgeous) and go up to Chiang Mai in the north to have more of a Thai cultural experience and to visit some of the hill villages. Visiting Bangkok and Ko Samui was a great vacation with the kids though!

Catching up with C

2009-09-11T14:51:00.008+07:00

C has been a busy boy of late, with turning 5 and starting kindergarten and all. He actually had 2 birthday parties, one with his Nana and Peepah while we were back in Wisconsin and then one here in Jakarta with his friends. Since he loves all things birthday and loves it when life is all about him, he had a blast at both parties! I don't know if it's the knowing that he is another year older, or if it's just coincidence, but the person he is in my eyes or the phases he goes through do seem to change with each passing year. His 4th year was mostly a very challenging time for me. The talking back seemed to take hold in a serious way, the potty talk was more abundant, and the general struggle with emerging from the toddler stage to the school boy stage was a very rocky transition. Perhaps worst of all was that I didn't expect it, I didn't know the 4th year could be so difficult. However, fortunately for our family he wasn't strangled in the process and sharing life with him is becoming easier and more fun once again. And now he is becoming more independent and ever so slowly moving away from his mother's arms. Thank goodness he is still my cuddlebug, but the move away has begun. I am trying not to dwell on this realization, but instead celebrating the freedom this affords me and the boy who's personality is becoming richer and more complex.

Cutting his Ben Ten cake at his Jakarta bday party

So far he is really enjoying kindergarten. He is attending the Jakarta International School (JIS) and we are impressed with the school. His teacher seems great and he is making friends with the other kids in his class. He has more responsibilities now (and so do I, as well as a much earlier wake-up call!) and is being challenged in new and fun ways. He rides the bus to school and back and we both love that! He has also started playing soccer after school once/week and he really seems to like it. I am very relieved about this as he tends to give up very quickly and isn't very "sporty", but I think it would be good for him to be part of a sports activity and to learn about perseverance.

His first day of school

Coming home on the bus

At soccer practice

The bad news about C of late pertains to his teeth. Ever since he was conceived I have wished for him to inherit his father's teeth and his mother's eyes (J has had like 1 cavity his whole life and I have never had to wear glasses). Unfortunately though it seems that he has inherited my teeth, as at the tender age of 5 he has 1 deep cavity and another tooth needing a root canal. How this happens to a boy who brushes his teeth daily and doesn't eat very much candy or soda is beyond me, but it seems it must be genetic. So we have started brushing more earnestly and have also begun flossing (I mean, it seems cruel and unusual punishment that a 5 year old should have to floss!). In the meantime, however, we have to get his teeth fixed. Fortunately we finally found an excellent dentist in Jakarta, but by then he had already developed some fears (like having water sprayed in his mouth). We have spent numerous visits trying to overcome his fears and were just about ready to make a trip to Singapore so he could go under general anesthesia and get his teeth fixed. Fortunately though we tried one more time here in Jakarta and this time he learned to tolerate the nitrous oxide and it looks like we will be able to complete the work here. Thank goodness, as this will save him from being knocked out, save us a couple thousand dollars, and save 1-2 teeth from being extracted!

So there is C's life from the last 6 weeks in a nutshell!

Hey there stranger!

2009-08-10T16:29:00.021+07:00

I know, I know! It's been over 3 months in fact...long time no see! How ya been?

I apologize for the long absence. Between all the trips we have taken in the last several months and a general feeling on my part of not wanting to sit in front of the computer, I have not found the time nor the inclination to write. I will try to give a brief summary of our life since April, and then we can move on to the here and now.

The family dressed in traditional Indonesian batik for C's end-of-school-year concert

In April we took a fabulous trip to Western Australia. We spent a few days in Perth and a few days in Margaret River, an area south of Perth that is well known for their wine production and nice beaches. The weather was perfect - sunny and warm during the day and cold and crisp at night. We thoroughly enjoyed all the fresh air and good food that W. Australia had to offer. Our activities in Perth included walking around the city and parks, visits to playgrounds, walks on the beach, and petting koala bears and 'kookoorooroos' (that's kangaroos in LC-ese) at a wildlife park. Farther south we did much of the same - beach walks and playground visits, walking and shopping around Margaret River town, and a visit to a winery. I would have preferred more time at wineries, but unfortunately I was outvoted. All in all a very good trip!

A few observations about Western Australia:

- it's very pretty and wide open and lovely, in a barren and solitary-like way

- food in restaurants is ridiculously expensive, and we never figured out why

- they are brilliant when it comes to playgrounds - there was even a playground at the winery!

- they make excellent wine

- Perth is the most isolated city, and it is closer to Jakarta than it is to Sydney

- Perth feels more like a big country town then a metropolis

In May J and I took a long weekend to celebrate our 9th wedding anniversary. We went to Losari coffee plantation and resort in Central Java. We had an absolutely wonderful time enjoying the quiet and relaxation and cooler temperatures. The resort is in a beautiful setting and has a lovely spa, a beautiful lounge and reception area where they served afternoon tea, and a bar with a pool table where I am happy to say I beat J twice! I also enjoyed my first al fresco yoga session one morning overlooking the fog wisped (I realize wisp is not a verb but it should be!) mountain. It was another successful adventure!

Losari Coffee Plantation and Resort

Our latest voyage was our longest - 7 weeks back in the US. This trip was our home leave so J was able to join us for 3 weeks of the trip, and his work paid for our flights in business class. The trip over went much better than it had the previous year. The fact that LC is a whole year older made a huge difference, and we were able to get him to sleep more easily and he was entertained for quite some time by videos. The worst part of the trip back was in Dallas when we ended up with an 8 hour layover instead of the 4 hours we had planned. We had to carry both sleeping children onto the plane to Florida because they just couldn't stay awake any longer. While this delay really sucked at the time, in the end it might have been an excellent mishap. As a result of the delay we didn't get the kids to bed at J's parents' house in Florida until 11 p.m. And so, they slept through the night! And they slept through the night every night afterward, so jet lag was not nearly as challenging as it could have been.

The view of sunrise from the plane as we neared America

While in Florida we relaxed and ate a lot of ham and did some shopping. And then we went to Disney. Unfortunately for us J was sick for most of that adventure, although he isn't much of a Disney aficionado, so he was quite happy to get out of as many Disney activities as he could. The rest of us however had a marvelous time! My SIL and FIL did an excellent job of planning the trip, so we stayed in a nice hotel on the park grounds, ate meals in good restaurants, and even enjoyed a 'character breakfast' when Mickey, Goofy, Lilo and Stitch came around to our table to hug the kids.

We spent the most time at Magical Kingdom, where we enjoyed a couple parades, went on several rides and walked and walked! We also went to Hollywood Studios and Epcot, which is my favorite, although we didn't spend very much time there. Unfortunately the heat was horrible - incredibly hot and humid and far worse than it ever is in Jakarta! But aside from that we had a really great time, and it was so fun for me to enjoy Disney with my children and view the wonder through their eyes.

From Florida we headed to Washington, DC where we lived before moving to Indonesia and where most of our friends live. The weather in DC was absolutely perfect, and once again we walked all over! We revisited the Air & Space Museum and the Natural History Museum like we did last year. Although C is still interested in dinosaurs, he didn't seem to enjoy the Natural History Museum nearly as much as he did last year. However, he still really liked the planes and spaceships at Air & Space. We also enjoyed a morning at the zoo and it was wonderful as always. This year we also included a tour around the memorials and monuments. J and I really enjoy doing this, and the kids were quite tolerant. We ended up walking for miles, or at least it felt like it, and incredibly C walked for much of it.

In front of the capital building

At the Roosevelt Memorial

After spending most of the week in DC we enjoyed Independence Day weekend with our good friends in Silver Spring, MD. As always we had a fantastic time catching up and relaxing with our dearest friends. On July 4th our hosts cooked an amazing slow-cooked pork dish which still makes me salivate, and LC burned his finger on his first sparkler - a successful Independence Day if you ask me!

Unfortunately mom was too busy taking a photo to realize LC was just about to burn his finger

C, aka Spiderman, with a sparkler

Wisconsin was our next destination. J stayed for our first week and then flew to NC for work, and then finally back to Jakarta. The kids and I stayed in Wisconsin for a total of 1 month so that we could have more frequent and more relaxed visits with my family and friends. We were fortunate enough to be able to spend the month in our dear friend's unoccupied yet furnished house so that we weren't living on top of my mom the whole time. Of course this meant I had to do some cooking and cleaning for the first time in 2.5 years, but it was well worth it!

C's 5th bday party - party #1
As you can plainly see, LC loved C's cake!

J pretends to be an East Coast big city snob, but really he's a Cheesehead at heart

The weather in WI was mostly horrendous, considering that it was supposed to be the warmest time of the year. It only reached 60F a few days and rarely made it to 80F. This threw a wrench in my plan to spend a great deal of time at outdoor concerts and at our friend's lake house, but it was also a nice change to have cooler weather. We spent a great deal of time at playgrounds and eating ice cream, visiting with friends and family, going to children's museums, going to movies and doing some shopping. I also had the opportunity to catch up with a few long lost high school friends, make a weekend trip to Minneapolis, and enjoy a small town parade with my extended family. All in all it was a successful trip and my belly is nicely full from all the cheese, beer, ice cream and brats that I stuffed into it (have you noticed the pork consumption theme of the trip?...).

And then the dreaded day arrived, the day when I would have to fly back to Jakarta for 36 hours alone with a 2 year old and a 5 year old. The saving grace of the trip was that we were able to take the direct flight from Newark to Singapore (at 18 hours it is the longest flight in the world) on Singapore Airlines in business class. And this is a huge bonus I fully admit. It made it much more manageable, and in the end really benefited everyone. Because, if it hadn't been for those nice seats that allowed us all to get some decent sleep, my children might no longer be alive. The trip was quite tolerable until the last 4 hours of the 18 hour flight and the 4 hour layover in Singapore. By the end of that long plane ride LC was jumping all over the place, creating make-shift slides wherever he could, screaming at every diaper change, and just plain acting like an overtired 2 year old boy. And then the layover in Singapore, which was 240 long minutes of hell. I couldn't get us on the earlier flight back to Jakarta, so I was stuck with 2 kids who were exhausted and who had had enough of each other. They were at each other the entire time and I was minutes away from losing it. Fortunately, before I lost my last screw, it was time to get on our last flight and the boys slept the whole flight back.

So all in all it was a successful trip - I didn't strangle my kids, my belly is full of pig meat and cow milk of various forms, and my lungs are once again a pretty pink color from all the lovely fresh air!

And now we're back in Jakarta and the jet lag has mostly subsided. Five days after we returned we held another birthday party for C with all his friends, then LC started back at school, and C started kindergarten, and riding the bus!, at the Jakarta International School. We have dived back into our life here and we will continue to be busy with the many trips and family visits we have planned for this next year!

Happy Mother's Day!

2009-05-10T20:46:00.004+07:00

According to some, Jakarta sucks

2009-04-24T14:37:00.008+07:00

So, evidently my family and I live in the 2nd worst expat city in the world. This is not counting high conflict cities such as Baghdad, but according to this report the only worse city to live in as an expat than ours is Lagos. And while I've never been to Lagos, my impression is that there would have to be a big jump from Lagos to Jakarta.

My friends and I have been discussing it and we are all quite surprised at Jakarta's low ranking. I tried to find out from the ORC Worldwide website, which conducted the survey, what all of the criteria were for the survey and who they surveyed, but I was unsuccessful. I do know from the article that the firm looked at 55 cities that could be considered "hardship posts" and considered aspects such as pollution, disease, political violence, and availability of goods and services.

I will be the first to admit that pollution is pretty bad here. While I don't see a grey cloud hanging over Jakarta, I also don't see clear blue skies all that often. I also believe that the pollution is part of the explanation as to why I've gotten sick so much here (colds and other respiratory infections) and why the illnesses hang on for seemingly ever. However, it doesn't hurt to breath and I'm sure there is worse pollution in other cities.

Jakarta is in the tropics, so with all this humidity and heat year round there is bound to be more diseases here than in many other locations. And Jakarta isn't the cleanest town, but I've seen and heard about far worse. Related to the disease criteria, I would guess that access to medical care was also one of the criteria that was considered in the survey. Again, medical care here is better than some places, and worse than others. Having lived and traveled all over Africa however, I have to say access to medical care is much better here. And, Singapore, which has premiere medical care, is only 1.5 hours away by plane.

The survey also considered political violence, and I can't believe that Jakarta would have scored poorly on this criteria. For one, Indonesians are not a violent people in general. Just last month Indonesia had elections and I heard of very few instances of violence. There are demonstrations and rallies like in any truly democratic society, but violence is rare. I imagine the threat of terrorism was also considered during the survey, and I know that the US and other governments consider Indonesia to be a high risk country for attacks. The threat of terrorist attacks does exist here, but there hasn't been a large scale attack since the Bali bombings in 2002 and no significant small attacks since 2003. All of the hotels, malls, large office buildings and some restaurants screen both cars and people for weapons and bombs. I rarely even think about the threat of terrorism here, and I honestly feel no less safe here than I did living in the D.C. area.

Jakarta must have scored well on access to goods and services. I can get almost anything I want here, and there are plenty of nice restaurants and opportunities for entertainment. The malls have Gucci stores, the movie theaters show current movies and have lounge chairs and hi def speakers, there are 2 Starbucks within a 10 minute drive of our house and several nice grocery stores where you can procure almost any ingredient. There are playgrounds and water parks and a Sea World and a zoo for children. There are first class international schools, high speed internet, and almost everyone speaks English.

All of this leads me to wonder who they asked! I'm guessing they surveyed executives of for-profit companies who have either never lived abroad or only lived in 1st world countries. They probably spend hours stuck in traffic, which is horrible here, but who don't really know Indonesians well and who may not have children. Did they survey people who work for a wide variety of companies? Did they survey the non-working spouses? Did they survey parents of young children?

All in all I think they got it wrong. Jakarta is a great place to live. Yes the pollution is pretty bad and the traffic can really suck, there are way too many people and motorcycles, and there is a small threat of terrorist attacks and a big threat of natural disasters.

But, there are so many wonderful things about Jakarta. For starters, Indonesians are really wonderful people. They are open, kind, patient and they love to laugh. Living amongst people who welcome you to their country is to me probably the most important criteria of whether a city is a good expat city or not. Did they even consider this? Furthermore, the expat community is large and diverse, there are plenty of creature comforts, domestic labor is cheap so we are well taken care of (this sounds a bit crass but so true), it is a financially advantageous place to live, we have access to good medical facilities and schools, and there are many exciting and nearby travel destinations. Basically, I think ORC Worldwide is pretty off the mark!

Photos from March

2009-04-05T20:34:00.006+07:00

I have half written a post about a couple recent trips I took to Singapore, but in the mean time I thought I'd post a few photos of the boys from the last month or so. Hopefully I'll get the Singapore entry posted this week as well, because we're headed to Perth on Sunday for one fun-filled week!

The following photo was taken a couple weekends ago when we went to Taman Mini, an amusement-type park that is about 20 minutes from our house. In Taman Mini there is a cable car, a bird park, reptile park, aquarium, transportation museum, examples of different housing throughout Indonesia, and other activities. This photo was taken while we were waiting for the train to take us around the park. Notice the sweat drenched hair plastered to their heads?

Here is C and LC posing with their "friends" during their tea party. They were very sweet with all their friends and made sure they all had an equal share. And no, there is no special reason why C is wearing a Spiderman costume. Why be regular old C when you can be Spiderman?! Our friends in DC may remember that C absolutely refused to wear a costume for Halloween the year before we left the US (he was almost 2.5 then. He was supposed to be a cowboy but was a Packer fan instead since his coat happened to be a Packer coat). Now we've gone to the other extreme - we have trouble getting them off him!

LC takes a 2 hour nap every afternoon. C no longer takes naps (except on very rare occasions), but some Sundays J and I are desperate for a bit more sleep. This photo was taken on one of those Sundays. When J and I awoke from our nap, this is what we found in the playroom. It is probably difficult to see what's going on in this photo. It's basically a car/airplane/dinosaur/Ben Ten convention. It was miraculous that C played on his own for 2 hours straight without coming into our room even once, and here is what kept him so busy. I would have loved to be a fly on the wall to hear what conversations the cars, airplanes, dinosaurs, and Ben Ten characters were having!

We took the following two photos today. Both C and LC love their rain boots. And here they are modeling them - C is hamming it up for the camera while still in his PJs and wearing his fireman rain boots, and C is showing off his baby belly and bumble bee boots (and trying to push C out of the way in order to get some food from Dad).

This morning we drove about 1 hour outside of Jakarta with some friends. Here are some of the kids on their way to feed the ducks. We had a great time enjoying the open space and getting out of the polluted hustle and bustle of Jakarta. While there we visited some cows and sheep and fish, walked around the orchid and orange orchards, and had a nice picnic. It was a very nice day and we realized we need to get out of Jakarta more often!

Spa-ing, Jakarta style

2009-03-23T15:20:00.012+07:00

Surprisingly, I haven't yet bragged about the amazing spa opportunities here in Jakarta. If you love to indulge in a spa treatment from time to time but don't like the hit it takes on your pocketbook, then Jakarta is an ideal place to be. There are endless facilities and treatments to indulge in, and there is something to suit everyone. After more than 2 years here I have found my favorite spots for the different treatments, but I am still searching for just 1 location that does everything well and has the best atmosphere. I don't think I'll ever find it, but it's awfully fun to look!

My most favorite treatment is a plain old massage. The best massage I've ever had is in Eau Claire, WI from a professional massage therapist who is also a dear family friend. I don't think any massage will ever be as good as her's. However, while I haven't found a massage here that is as good as the massages you can get in the US, they are far less expensive and are often in more beautiful surroundings. The cheapest massages I've heard of in Indonesia are on the beach at a hotel or resort, but from women who are not affiliated with the hotel. One hour of massage from one of these ladies can cost between $2-5. Yes, one hour, on the beach, for less than a value meal at McDonald's.

In Jakarta prices are more, but not a whole lot more! I know of a business that will send a masseuse to your house for the bargain price of $8 for 1 hour. I have a friend who regularly uses this service - why I haven't yet is beyond me...! One hour massages at most of the salons cost well under $20. The price varies by a couple dollars (or by thousands of rupiah I should say), but this price seems to be fairly standard. It's more expensive in the hotel spas, as you would expect, and quite a bit more in the Bali hotels (although still cheaper than in the US). My favorite place to go is just 5 minutes away from my house (one of the benefits) at Allure Spa. I like the treatment rooms, they smell good, there are showers and a sauna, a cafe if I'm lucky to have that much time, they give you ginger tea, and of course the massages are very good. This place is hit or miss with the massage therapists, so I only go there if I can get someone I like. The cost for 1.5 hour massage: 240,000 rp or about $20!

Manicures and pedicures are also popular here. The best thing about having them done here is that you can have it done simultaneously during another treatment, such as getting your hair done, getting a cream bath (more later) or a facial. Indonesia is a full service sort of place when it comes to spas! This is a fortunate thing here as with wearing sandals year-round your feet can get pretty messed up fairly quickly. Almost all the hair salons and spas do manis and pedis, and I often get them done somewhere close to home to cut down on time. But my favorite place to get them is a spa called Rangoon Feliz. They are one of the fastest places (somehow most places take 1.5 hours to do a pedi) and definitely have the best atmosphere - nice decor, open room overlooking a tropical garden and with the soothing sound of bubbling water. It's very peaceful.

A wonderful discovery I had upon arriving in Jakarta is this treatment called "cream bath". If I ever wanted to open a salon in the US I would definitely import this treatment. First you have your hair slowly washed and deep conditioned. While they leave the conditioner on you sit in a chair while they massage your head, neck, shoulders and upper back for about 1 hour. And remember that they do several treatments at once? So imagine sitting there with someone massaging your shoulders, while another woman is giving you a manicure, and a third woman is giving you a pedicure, while you sip ginger tea (or champagne!) overlooking a beautiful garden. It is amazingly ridiculous, and feels so wonderfully indulgent! And it only costs about $10!

My mother's and mother-in-law's favorite treatment here is the facial. When we moved here one of J's colleagues recommended a woman from Mil-n-Mat salon for facials. She told me she was the best in Jakarta so I never bothered to look anywhere else. For about $20, not only do you get a facial (using a European skin care product), but you also get a fantastically relaxing head and face massage. It usually lasts 1.5 hours and it is wonderful. My mom and J's mom both loved it and I suspect it is at the top of their to do list when/if they come back to Jakarta.

Reflexology is also very popular here and you can find reflexology spots in most malls and neighborhoods. I think they're very nice, although J wonders why anyone would subject themselves to that kind of torture and actually pay for it.

My latest discovery in the realm of self pampering is a "fish spa". This concept is an import originally from Turkey, and is becoming popular all over Asia. Basically, you sit with your feet in a pool of water where 100 or so Garra Rufa fish (also known as Dr. Fish species) nibble at your feet! It is by far one of the most bizarre sensations I've ever experienced. It didn't hurt in the least as they fish don't have any teeth, but it tickles and is just very odd. In the beginning I felt a bit hysterical having all these tiny fish nibble at my skin, but by the end of the 1/2 hour it did feel kind of good, and my skin felt nice and smooth afterwards. Evidently this treatment was historically used to treat some skin diseases, and now is also used for relaxation, exfoliation and to promote blood circulation. It was quite an experience that I'm glad I've had, but if I have time for a spa treatment I'd definitely prefer something else. Plus, at 120,000 rp ($10) for 1/2 hour it's actually on the expensive side. For anyone who is fairly ticklish on their feet, this would be pure torture.

Fish spa therapy

Our little Balinese dancer

2009-02-17T19:44:00.002+07:00

A couple weekends ago was Chinese New Year, a fairly big holiday here in Jakarta due to the large population of Chinese Indonesians. As it was a 3 day weekend and we didn't do much for x-mas this year, we decided to take a long weekend and head to Bali. There isn't one perfect place in Bali, so when deciding which part of Bali to go to for this trip we had to decide what we really wanted...best culture, go to Ubud...best nightlife, go to Seminyak or Kuta...best place for quiet, beauty and relaxation, go to Nusa Dua. There are other areas of Bali too of course, like basically the entire island since all the above places are in the southern part of the island. We haven't yet ventured to the north or east parts of the island, which are also supposed to be wonderful. In any event, we decided to return to the first place we went to in Bali, to Nusa Dua (it's on the southeast corner). We wanted quiet, beauty, clean clear beaches, and an easy place to take the kids. Nusa Dua Beach Hotel was the perfect place.

Unfortunately I was recovering from a virus and was pretty miserable the first 24 hours or so. Our first full day there was also cloudy and rainy, and we didn't have many plans for rain, so we were a bit stuck. To fill the time we took walks and played at the playground, and for dinner we headed to the area mall. This is a bit sad, but with the rain there aren't a lot of options with kids. Thankfully the following morning was bright and sunny, and we headed straight to the water after breakfast. One thing we love about Nusa Dua are the clean beaches and calm water - perfect for kids! And as usual, the kids had a great time playing in the sand and C enjoyed getting in the ocean. LC, on the other hand, is still very hesitant about the idea of all that water, and water that moves and makes noise! He preferred to be held the entire time he was anywhere near the ocean. Both boys preferred the pool to the sea, so most of our water time was spent poolside. Nusa Dua has a beach pool, so the kids could play in the sand both outside of the water and inside the pool. They both loved this, especially LC. We love it too because for at least part of the time we parents could just sit back and watch them play in the water. C also had fun paddling around the pool with his floaties and jumping into the pool. LC of course had to copy C, so he was jumping in as well (big difference being we have to catch him).

For dinner that night we took a taxi over to Jimberan Bay, which is on the southwest side of the island. It's a great spot for watching the sun set, as it is a wide open beach with several restaurants that all have tables and chairs right on the beach to provide everyone with a front row seat. These restaurants serve fresh seafood, which you get to hand pick and they bbq for you. We came here with J's parents in Oct. '07, and we ended up at the exact same restaurant (our taxi driver picked it). When we arrived at the restaurant, C informed us that this is where his grandpa hurt his finger in the car door. Mind you, this happened 16 months earlier and we probably haven't mentioned it once since then. C's memory is unbelievable! Unfortunately the beach was far dirtier this time; it was filled with all kinds of trash. Other than that though, we had a nice time enjoying the beautiful sunset, salt air, and good fresh fish and prawns. There was also some Balinese dancers giving a performance at the restaurant. We just saw a bit before we had to leave, but LC was totally transfixed. Balinese dance is quite interesting. The dancers tell a story with their bodies as usual, but they also use their eyes a great deal. It's amazing how expressive they are with just their eyes. The dance is also unique due to the arm and hand movements, which remind me of Egyptian or Thai movements (if that helps at all...). Here below is a video I got off of YouTube.

We spent our last morning in Bali in the pool. J stayed in the room to pack and I took the boys to the pool. All I have to say is thank god for floaties! It makes a big difference with the ratio of 1 swimmer to 2 non-swimmers! From there we got ready and went to the airport and had another easy, non-eventful flight home (we love Air Asia, but some of our friends have had bad experiences with flight delays, etc. ). All in all another successful Bali trip!

This past weekend at home was much less interesting. One fun thing though is that LC started to dance a little differently. Every time we played music he would start doing this funny thing with his arms, almost like he was doing a jig. It took me a few days (duh!) but I finally realized that he was dancing like a Balinese dancer! So now our little 19 month old Bahasa Indonesia speaker can also dance Balinese!

Update: For the last 2+ weeks (since I wrote this post) I have been trying to take video of LC doing his Balinese dance. However, it seems I realized what he was doing too late...he hasn't done it again! And he won't do it. So sorry folks, I can't get my little Balinese dancer on film to demonstrate his wonderful dance...

School Days

2009-01-29T17:29:00.000+07:00

My baby started school last week. My baby who isn't such a baby anymore is now going to C's school, to the Toddler class, and I can't quite believe it. The last year and one-half has really flown by. It seems like just yesterday we were in Singapore enjoying our temporary existance - J was far from work and on administrative leave, C was getting to play and do a lot of fun things and be with his dad a lot, and I was reveling in the honeymoon period of having a brand new sleeping baby and being blissfully high on hormones. And now he walks and talks and plays with all of C's toys, and goes to school.

Getting in the car on his first day of school...he couldn't wait long enough for me to take a photo!

I was with him part of last week and he definitely seems to enjoy it. How could he not being surrounded by loads of new toys and activities and children his own age?! He was a bit too impatient with circle time and had trouble sitting still (big surprise!), but otherwise he really did a good job. His teacher is Miss Ani, who was also C's teacher when he first started at this school. LC is only going 3 mornings/week, which is plenty for me right now. I have to admit I'm having a bit of separation anxiety myself... The house was so quiet this morning! I do welcome having 3 mornings/week completely child free, but it will also be an adjustment.

Having fun playing with all the new toys

Eating, one of his favorite activities, with his new friends

Developmentally LC continues to soar. Physically he is in the 95th percentile for weight, and 50th for height and head circumference. He doesn't seem to have quite the big noggen that C has, but close, and he certainly makes up for it everywhere else! He loves being active and trying to do everything that C does, including jumping from anything he can and running everywhere. Verbally he seems quite proficient, as he understands just about everything in both English and Bahasa Indonesia, and has quite a large oral vocabulary as well. He tells us to "sit here" and "go car" and the most recent additions to his vocabulary are octopus (octpus) and please - 2 good additions if you ask me! He's a bundle of joy and fun and is definitely the cutest 1 year old on the planet. He also might be the king of fits, but fortunately and thankfully they don't occur too terribly often.

So both my boys are in school. I can see why parents of older kids say that it goes by so fast - it feels that we're on a speeding train that will never slow down...

A new era

2009-01-21T10:48:00.005+07:00

Yesterday (for me!) an estimated 1.5 million people braved the cold, crowds and long lines to witness first hand a most historical event in USA's history - the swearing in of its first African American president. While it doesn't matter to me what race Obama is, I do recognize the significance it bears and how greatly this shows just how far my nation has come. What matters more to me though is the end of the Bush era, the end of a leadership that was the most tyrannical, blind, selfish, narrow-minded, elitist, and hateful that I have ever had the misfortune of witnessing in America. There is very little that Bush did right, and the wrongs that he committed will take far longer to repair than was taken to make. But I have hope that at least some of those wrongs will be righted, and that today starts a new era filled with hope, light, fairness, inclusiveness, diplomacy, civility, and intelligence. I am not naive, I know that things will not be made perfect nor will it or can it be done quickly, nor is Obama my perfect ideal of who a president would be, but I do have hope and I do believe that he will do a lot of good in the next 4-8 years. Mostly, I am so happy to feel hope and to be positive about the direction our country is now going, rather than the despair and anger and frustration I have felt for 8 years. 8 years!

I had high expectations of watching the inauguration on tv. However, being 12 hours ahead of Wa, DC, and feeling quite sick all day, I couldn't make it past 10 and didn't see anything other than the first crowds and the long lines for the metro (subway). I would have liked to be there in person, but even if we still lived in DC I don't know that we would have gone. I suppose it would have depended on daycare first of all... There were parties here in Jakarta as well. There was a gala event at the Ritz Carlton hotel that was to broadcast the swearing in, and there was also a free event at the J.W. Marriott that was also going to broadcast the proceedings. That would have been fun. Instead our evening transpired like most do, and there was no cheering or fanfare. But I was there in spirit.

Finally - Congratulations President Obama! We welcome you to the privileged office of being the president of the USA, and are thankful that you do indeed view it as a privilege and not your right. Good luck to you, as you have a very, very tough road in front of you.

Finally...Cambodia

2009-01-11T16:24:00.000+07:00

The peanut gallery is growing restless for this post, and since this gallery consists largely of my family I'd better listen up! You know though how much more daunting a task is when it's large...it's been difficult to get this post started. We spent an amazing week in Cambodia in October with J's parents, and we saw and did so much it's difficult to find the time to describe it all.

I am sensing I am becoming a bit too cavalier about the packing routine. "Oh, it's just 5 days in Asia...not a big deal. Yes, it's with 2 small kids and yes, it's an international trip, but it's just 5 days and it's a relatively short flight". Um, yeah. Well, you can probably guess that this arrogance was a hindrance when the day before we were leaving it took me hours to pack and I ended up forgetting quite a few necessities. Serves me right, I know.

The flight did go smoothly however. We changed planes in Singapore and had enough time to eat and let the kids romp. Singapore airport is a great airport. It isn't massive, but it has plenty of shopping and restaurants, as well as a kids play area. It is easy to find one's way and the growing familiarity is comforting. We met up with J's parents there. They were coming off of a massive Asia cruise (visit their website for details of their adventures) that conveniently ended in Singapore. They had already been to Indonesia to visit us so we thought it would be fun to go somewhere in Asia where we haven't all been. If you know J's parents and their love of travel, and you know our love of travel, you may guess that this doesn't leave us with a whole lot of options. It was between Cambodia and Malaysia and obviously Cambodia was the winner.

We flew directly from Singapore to Siem Reap, which is the nearest town to the Angkor temples. I found Siem Reap to be a surprisingly nice town - one that still holds some colonial romanticism while still being obviously Cambodian. From what I understand the town has grown exponentially in the last few years, filling up with numerous hotels to accommodate the growing number of tourists. I'm sure to frequent visitors the town is worse for wear because of it, but to me it didn't seem to have a bad effect. Or maybe I just wasn't there long enough. There were several good restaurant options, a nice new museum, some shopping, and it was easy to get around. All in all a good town. And this being our first stop in Cambodia, this is where we discovered how delicious Cambodian food is! We ate very well while we were there and I'm wondering if there's anywhere in Jakarta where I can find a Cambodian restaurant...

The highlight of this part of the trip, and really the whole trip, were the temples of Angkor. If you've heard of them, you probably heard they were amazing. And simply put, they are. There are some 1,000 different temples (all generally known as "Angkor Wat" or Angkor temples, but Angkor Wat is actually just one temple. Angkor is derived from Sanskrit and means city) which were built between the 9-13th centuries. The temples are now a UNESCO World Heritage Site and are the #1 tourist destination in Cambodia.

The first thing I noticed about Cambodia was how nice their airports are. I suppose I was expecting them to be more like Indonesian airports (run-down and uncomfortable) because Cambodia isn't a rich Asian country, but instead they had wonderful style and were very clean and updated. The day we arrived we had little time left in the day to do anything other than make sure our hotel's room A/C was fixed (Cambodia is very hot and humid!) and go out to dinner. And this was fine with all of us as it had been a relatively long day (as traveling with 2 small kids can only be...) and we knew we had a big day ahead of us.

The next morning we started out relatively early in order to get a jump on the heat. We met up with our guide who would show us some of the temples over the following 2 days. We knew that 2 days only to see the Angkor temples was not nearly enough; however, we doubted that our kids' patience levels would last any longer. And, we weren't sure ours or J's parents' would either given the heat and humidity. In the end we were all satisfied with 2 days as we were able to see 6 major temples and our kids didn't hate us at the end of it.

Our first stop was the south gate of Angkor Thom, which means "the great city". It is an enclosure for the Bayon temple. The south gate is entered by way of a bridge with many statues lining the bridge on either side. The gate is enormous and beautiful, and it was brimming over with tourists. And while it was really gorgeous, we didn't stay long because it was so annoyingly full of tourists. So we walked through the gate and met up with our car on the other side, and headed off to our first major temple of the trip - Bayon.

The Bayon temple was built starting the end of the 12th century. It was built as a Buddhist temple and is famous for the faces on many of its towers and its abundant bas-reliefs. Bayon temple is impressive and amazing, and is a must-see for any visitor to Angkor temples. However, it was also the most taxing temple and the hottest - there were few opportunities for respite from the sun and there was quite a bit of climbing. There were also a lot of tourists, so it was very crowded. We also tried putting LC in the backpack carrier and unfortunately he wasn't a great fan. So between the heat, the physical exertion, the crabby kids and the equally annoying tourists, it was one of our least favorites. And this is a shame, because it is definitely considered to be one of the very best temples.

From the Bayon we walked a short distance to see another structure (the Royal Palace?) which we decided not to explore, and also the Terrace of the Elephants. This monument is a 360 meter long sandstone wall covered with reliefs of life-size elephants that date back to the end of the 12th century. We (just me and J's dad) didn't spend very much time here because the rest of the family was back in the air-conditioned van and we were growing jealous. So we took a fairly cursory stroll by the wall and then took sanction in the A/C as quickly as possible.

After a short drive we reached our next destination, Preah Khan temple. This ended up being one of my favorite temples, mostly because there were so few tourists there, there was a nice long shaded walk to get to the temple, and the light in and around the temple was amazing. Unfortunately the kids were restless by this point and weren't very interested in exploring the temple, but they were happy to sit outside, eat bananas and charm the Cambodians.

Preah Khan, which means the sacred sword, was built as a Buddhist temple, monastery and center of learning in the 12th century. It is a large complex of buildings and corridors and land. It is set deep in the forest and there were gorgeous old trees everywhere, and the light diffusing through the trees and into the corridors was mythical. The flooring was uneven and a bit treacherous for J's mom, so she stopped part way through and instead had a very pleasant conversation with a Cambodian man. J stayed back with the kids most of the time, so J's dad and I were left to explore the temple for the group. It took us a while, but it was well worth the journey.

After visiting Preah Khan we headed back to Siem Reap to grab lunch and a nap. The necessity to allow LC to have a nap every afternoon proved beneficial to all of us - the heat and humidity along with physical exertion tired us all out, and we all crashed in the afternoons.

Once we all recovered from the morning and were well fed and rested, we left for the piece de resistance - Angkor Wat itself. This magnificent temple must be considered the temple of temples, for it really is extraordinary. Angkor Wat, which means pagoda city, was built in the first half of the 12th century as a Hindu temple and is the largest complex at Angkor. For far more detail and photos, including a couple nice aerial shots, click here.

To reach Angkor Wat you have to cross a huge moat, which is really more like a lake. The immensity of the temple seen from across this "lake" is humbling. Once across the moat you enter through an opening in an enclosure that encompasses the entire complex. You then walk on a stone walkway for several hundred meters to the temple itself, which consists of a 3-tiered pyramid and central shine. There is much to describe when speaking of Angkor Wat - many beautiful bas-reliefs, tall stone towers, numerous causeways and steep stairs, beautiful light and shadows. However, it is a place to be felt, not described. The photos above may help you get a bit of that feel for it though, I hope.

(I am starting to loathe having to write this post, so I'm afraid I'm going to try to wrap this up quickly, which means I'm going to skim over the rest of the trip. Sorry, but I started this 1 month ago and now it's 2009 and time to write something else!)

Our second day of temples included a long drive out to Banteay Srei and Banteay Samre, and in the afternoon a visit to Ta Prohm. Banteay Srei was beautiful - red clay and intricate beautiful bas-reliefs in every nook and cranny and facade. Banteay Samre was the least interesting temple we visited; however, it was also the least populated so it was also beautifully quiet and serene. I checked it out quickly, but mostly my mother-in-law and I stayed outside with the kids and tried to relax from the heat.

Banteay Srei

Our final temple was the favorite of the group. It was amazing. This is the temple that was featured in Tomb Raider. There are huge trees growing through the roofs of the temples, and roots draping over the sides. It was also towards the end of the day and a storm was coming in, and the whole atmosphere felt otherworldly. It was built in 1186 but was not well maintained. As such over the centuries the surrounding forest moved back in and has taken root, literally. For me, the result gives it a far stronger spiritual presence and a feel unlike any of the other temples.

With our visit to Ta Prohm, our temple exploration came to a close. The following morning D and I fit in some more shopping to the market, and then in the afternoon we all left for Phnom Pehn. We arrived in the evening rush hour, and felt like we were back in Jakarta with the endless traffic and roar of motorcycles. We made it to our hotel and found that it was very centrally located, within walking distance of the Royal Palace and a row of nice restaurants. We filled our 2 full days in Phnom Phen with a visit to the Royal Palace, a tuk-tuk ride around the city, some more shopping, lots of walking, lunch at the Foreign Correspondents Club, and dinner at a wonderful tapas restaurant. We had a nice time in Cambodia's capital, but I wouldn't recommend it as a tourist stop. In retrospect I'd rather have spent those 2 days in Siem Reap or another place in Cambodia, or in Singapore.

Before bringing this post to a close, I want to talk a bit about the land mine victims and other victims of Pol Pot's regime. One of the main reasons to go to Cambodia is to learn more about this time, to go to the Killing Fields, etc. Unfortunately we weren't able to visit any of these historic places, as we were afraid that they would scare C. But we were still surrounded by some of the effects of this time period, by seeing limbless men and women trying to make a life, the poverty, the organizations that have popped up trying to provide these victims with aid. Many of the street musicians we saw were landmine victims, and there were many children roaming the temples and streets looking for handouts. Some of the shops we visited were organizations formed to employ mostly victims in order to provide them with a living. One of the shops we visited is part of the Tabitha Foundation. The site is: http://www.tabithastore.com/, and they had a huge selection of crafts for sale. Many of their products are made out of hand-made Cambodian silk, which is exquisite. Another Cambodian organization I've heard of is Riverkids, and they also have online shopping. Their site is http://riverkids.myshopify.com/ Please consider both organizations the next time you need to do some shopping.

And if you ever have the opportunity to visit the Angkor temples and this beautiful country with fantastic food, you should definitely take it!

Christmas in Indonesia - Top 10

2008-12-28T20:23:00.001+07:00

Top 10 Reasons to love x-mas in Indonesia:

10. Low demand for x-mas hams

9. The ants take care of the cookies left out for Santa

8. Seriously low risk of Santa coming down a working chimney

7. You don't have to water a plastic x-mas tree

6. You can convince the kids that the minor earthquakes are really Santa's sleigh landing on the roof.

5. Hours of fun listening to Indonesians attempt to sing the word "Wenceslaus"

4. Mosquitoes don't just spread malaria; they also spread holiday cheer

3. Prayer call is still at 4:30 a.m., but the mosques blare Jingle Bell Rock

2. New this year: Bird flu-free egg nog

1. After the Hanukkah blow-out, x-mas is soooo mellow

(Courtesy of my husband)

Happy holidays!

2008-12-24T19:52:00.006+07:00

Ho Ho Ho!!!

C has been so much fun this x-mas season. He's singing x-mas carols, talking about Santa daily, writing letters to Santa, counting down the days until x-mas, etc. He was excited for tonight, x-mas eve, to sing songs and leave cookies and carrots for Santa and the reindeer. And of course he is beyond excited for tomorrow morning (and J and I fear the early hour the morning may start).

I have a feeling with him that the Santa ruse won't last many years. He's already asking so many questions about Santa and x-mas eve - why does he go down the chimney? will he still come even though there's no snow? how does he fit all the presents into his sack? - that I guess he may figure it out early. I hope he doesn't, but he's too smart for his own good sometimes. I already think that next year we'll need to make sure to wrap Santa's presents in all different wrapping paper; I can just imagine him asking us how the gifts from Santa and his family are wrapped the same.

LC on the other hand doesn't have a clue. But I'm sure tomorrow morning he'll have a grand time ripping open the presents and playing with all the new toys. Unfortunately he has no patience whatsoever though so I'm imagining some temper tantrums as we wrestle with the god awful wrapping manufacturers cement their toys in.

And now J and I need to finish wrapping a few gifts, fill the stockings, and have a night cap.

Wishing you a lovely x-mas eve and a very merry x-mas (or Hanukkah or Kwanzaa or whatever you may be celebrating this time of year)!

Dear Santa

2008-11-09T21:37:00.000+07:00

It feels a little early, but C's school is having their annual Christmas charity celebration (it's a festival for the kids and their families, and the money is donated to a couple local charities) later this month, so we are starting to get in the holiday spirit. He even came home from school last week singing Christmas carols! C has also been drawing pictures (and they're recognizable!) and writing his letters a lot lately so I thought this year we would write a letter to Santa. It's awfully cute! (And for those of you who have no clue who Silaray (sp?) is, it's a character from Ben Ten, which is a show on Cartoon Network that C and all his friends love).

Spiderhalloween

2008-11-09T21:36:00.006+07:00

C is so into the superheros right now that there was little discussion about who he wanted to dress up as for Halloween. At first he wanted to be an astronaut, and I was so excited that it wouldn't be Batman, Superman, or Spiderman. But, in the end it was back to the Superheros, and the lucky winner this year was Spiderman. Since we were away the week before Halloween I didn't have much time to get LC's costume, so I took the easy way out and he went as a Spiderman too.

A few friends in the complex and I organized to have trick or treating the night after Halloween. They all came over beforehand for dinner and it was a bit chaotic, but fun. Then the kids busted out of here (they could NOT wait!) and joined the other kids from the complex for trick or treating. This was also the first Halloween for some of the international kids who live here, and they and their parents were especially thrilled with the night. It was a smashing success and C and LC had a great time! LC even got the hang of it after a few houses, so much so that he just kept taking more and more candy from the bowls! Then, about 3/4 of the way, he just got too tired and sat down. And that was the end of Halloween for the night.

At a friend's house for a kids Halloween party

Right before leaving for trick or treating. C was not happy about having to wait even one second more!

The Big Day

2008-11-03T17:56:00.004+07:00

In honor of Super Tuesday, we'd like to officially cast our ballot:

On a side note, we did already send in our absentee ballots, not that it will matter much in Maryland.

100th post

2008-10-20T20:20:00.000+07:00

This is my 100th post here on Indoprism! Yippee! I think a celebration is in order... While I've had some lulls, I'm pretty happy that I've kept the blog going for almost 2 years. I still want to start a "style" type section similar to dooce.com, but have it focus on Indonesian and Asian style/design/photos. Hopefully I'll start that someday soon, probably next year. Right now we're busy preparing for our trip to Cambodia next week and J's sister's visit, plus trying to get through my 'to do' list that seems to be permanently stuck on 18 items.

Happy 100th post Indoprism!

C'isms revisited

2008-10-20T16:36:00.005+07:00

We had a couple of gems this past month, both during a bathroom visit. There are occasional times during my life as a mother of boys when I'm just not sure how to respond. I've decided to mostly take an "acknowledge, and move on" approach to these occasions, and hope for the best.

C: "Look at how long my penis is! Why is it like that?"
Me: (thinking, um, um, um, oh god how do I answer this?...) "I don't know, it just does that sometimes."
C: "I guess it's a magic penis!"
Me: (thinking, ah! so this belief starts when they're boys!)

During another bathroom visit:

C: "I have 3 poops. A big one, a medium one, and a small one. It's like a family!"
Me: (trying not to laugh hysterically) "Yep, a family of poops."

Climbing Krakatau

2008-09-25T20:32:00.015+07:00

The adage "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em" popped into my head last weekend. I thought of this as I was hot and sweaty and dirty and tired, and climbing up the side of an active volcano. Because, if you live on the ring of fire, why not climb an active volcano?! If you're surrounded by volcanoes and scraping tectonic plates, why not tempt fate just a little bit more.

So that's exactly what we did. We joined a group of friends for a long weekend out of Jakarta, about 4 hours southwest of Jakarta on the west coast of Java. We spent the weekend at a sailing club on a peninsula called Tanjung Lesung. The beach was pretty nice, quite a bit of coral but plenty of sand for nice walks and sand castles. The water was also quite calm so C was able to play in the ocean by himself, which he seemed to really enjoy. The lodging at the sailing club was very, very basic, and overpriced in my opinion. But it was roomy and the open air restaurant had good food and was a lovely place to sit and relax, have a cold beer, and lose yourself in the sound of the ocean. The place was also extremely quiet and we didn't have to listen to traffic or the mosque for 3 glorious days. There were also huge grounds, and C and LC had a fantastic time running around and exploring.

On Saturday morning 8 of us headed off in a speedboat for Krakatau; we left the children behind as this was definitely a non-kid friendly outing. The boat ride there took about 1.5 hours. It was a bit choppy and most of the way I was fantasizing about big boxes of Dramamine. Fortunately though none of us lost our breakfast and we all recovered once we landed. One of our friends on the boat is a geologist so lucky for us we heard some history of Krakatau and lava and magma pipes, etc. Krakatau was quite striking, to say the least: an island fully consumed by a volcano and as barren as a desert, with hardened lava at it's base, rising out of the ocean 100 miles from land. Knowing its history made it even more amazing.

Anak Krakatau

Actually, Krakatau doesn't really exist anymore - it blew itself up in 1883. The explosion was heard as far away as the island of Rodriguez, more than 4600 km away (and is the loudest sound ever recorded), and sent up ash 80km high which fell on Singapore 840 km to the north and on ships as far as 6000 km away. In the explosion most of the island fell into the ocean, which sent tsunamis to Java and Sumatra, destroying 165 villages (Lonely Planet). Before the explosion Krakatau was estimated at 2000 meters above sea level with a radius of 9 km.

What remains of Krakatau today is about 1/3 of the original island, called Pulau Rakata, and Anak Krakatau, which means child of Krakatau. Pulau Rakata distinctly shows visitors just where the rest of her broke off (see below) and is covered in heavy vegetation. Anak Krakatau is the growing, active volcano you see above. Anak Krakatau has been growing out of the sea for the last 80 years, and regularly belches smoke, ash and lava. Rumblings from this volcano can be heard in W. Java, 50 km away. It is about 200 meters above sea level and has a radius of 2 km (wikipedia).

Pulau Rakata

We boated through where the mighty Krakatau once stood, and it was hard to imagine there once stood a volcano there 2000 meters high. We circled around Anak Krakatau, seeing the crater from where smoke and lava emits, and seeing where the lava spills into the sea. The boat landed on the eastern side where there's vegetation. Our group hiked up the side of the volcano, which was HOT! The sand is grey/black, and the intense heat emanates both from the sun above and from the sand below. The steep gradient, the heat, and the sand made the hike challenging, although mercifully not very long (1/2 hour). We couldn't hike all the way up the volcano; it is too dangerous to get too close to the crater. In the end it was worth the climb, but it wasn't exactly "fun" while we were doing it.

The crater on Anak Krakatau

Midway up the volcano, looking out at Pulau Lang

J's legs after the climb, covered in black sand

After the hike we had a picnic lunch and then the boat took us over to a nearby island, Lang (I think) for snorkeling. It felt great to get into the water after the sweaty, dirty hike. The snorkeling itself was fine; the coral was nice but we only saw a few interesting fish. Then it was time to return back to Java. We had been warned that this stretch of water can be rough and that we'd have to return a bit early because it was expected to be bad. But none of us was quite prepared for the crazy 2 hour journey back. The boat was constantly hitting waves that sent it airborne before crashing back onto the sea. We all had to continuously hold onto the boat for fear we'd be thrown out. Many of our friends' rearends were sore for days afterwards. We were also all wet the entire ride home from the sea spray, and our friends in the front of the boat had to stand most of the way so their backs wouldn't get broken. We were actually enjoying about the first 15 minutes. It was just so crazy and ridiculous and we were all regularly crying out "ohs!" and "ahs!". But then we hit a wave that sent us sideways and suddenly it stopped being so fun. I never felt like we we were in danger, but I was very happy that we had a good, sturdy boat and experienced drivers, and that the sky was clear.

All in all it was a great adventure, but definitely only a once in a lifetime experience.

Ramadan again

2008-09-10T15:44:00.004+07:00

I was about to write a whole post on the holy month of Ramadan, which we are 10 days into here in Indonesia (and for all devout Muslims around the world), and then I realized that I've been writing this blog for well over 1 year and probably wrote about it last year. And I did! Yippee! That's one post I don't have to write because if you're interested to know more about it you can go here to see what I wrote last year. Not much has changed since last year. The biggest change is that we moved to a new house in a complex last year, so our neighborhood isn't nearly as noisy. We can still hear the mosques, but they aren't as loud and we can no longer here the neighborhood "festivities". Since we're non-Muslims and we're in a huge cosmopolitan city, Ramadan doesn't change our lives in a big way. There are a few minor inconveniences here and there, but compared to what our Muslim neighbors are doing it is nothing. This year for Idil Fitri we will be staying in Jakarta. We were late in our planning this year and by the time we looked into getting away airline prices were already pretty steep. Jakarta will pretty much shut down for the 2 days of Idil Fitri, as in, I don't even think we can order a pizza or go to the grocery store. So it's a good time to get away, but on the other hand it will be nice to live in such a quiet city for once!

If you want to read more factual information, you can click here. I "get" the principles behind Ramadan; I can see how fasting all day and sacrificing sleep could make one more humble, more patient (maybe), more faithful. But, I also think it's crazy. I can't imagine not being able to drink a glass of water for 12 hours straight, all the while working, taking care of children, tending fields?! Plus, in order to eat enough calories to last throughout the day, you have to eat a lot during the night. So, you're eating at the expense of sleeping. I understand that during the month of Ramadan people will eat on and off from 6-9 p.m., and then sleep until 3 a.m., when they will wake up and start eating until the sun rises about 6. That's 6 hours of sleep every night for 30 nights.

That's gotta take a toll! There have been plenty of sleep studies showing that people need an average of 8 hours of sleep/night and that sleep deprivation makes people overly emotional, less capable of working machinery and doing general tasks, influences the brain's ability to make memories, etc. It makes me wonder just what a month of fasting and sleep deprivation does to people and to their country as a whole with regards to productivity, incidences of traffic, home and industrial accidents, etc... If anyone comes across any studies looking at this, let me know!

So, as you're enjoying your 8 hours of sleep every night (hopefully!), your morning coffee, your lunch, that refreshing glass of water during the day, just remember that during the entire month of September millions of people around the world are not...

Birthday

2008-09-07T16:26:00.005+07:00

It was my birthday on Sunday. We started celebrating on Friday night though with presents and my favorite chocolate cake in Jakarta (from a place called Gourmet Garage). Then on Saturday J and I stole away to a hotel in the center of Jakarta for the weekend. We spent a lazy day shopping, getting massages, relaxing at the hotel, and enjoying a delicious dinner at one of our two favorite restaurants in town (we went to Scusa, the other being Blowfish). The best part of the meal was that I discovered why people think tirimisu is such a big deal, because when it's done well, it really is a big deal (see photo above)! Yum! We slept in on Sunday, although unfortunately didn't sleep well, thanks to the idiot who kept calling my phone at 5 a.m., even though it was obviously a wrong number! We then enjoyed a lazy brunch and then headed back home to take care of the troops. And that's when my husband informed me that the "festival of B" was over. So sad.

So yeah, I turned 36. I've decided that this must be the official start of middle age. At least that's the way it feels to me. I'm on the downward slope to 40, I can't get away with saying I'm in my "early 30's" anymore, when life held the excitement of starting my career in earnest, buying our first home, having children. Now we've been there - done that. What makes the late 30's exciting and spectacular? I don't know...compared to our early 30's and our 20's it doesn't feel like much. Granted there will be another big move in there at some point, either back to the US or to another country, but other than that, it will be about career development and the kids getting older, but "excitement" doesn't come to mind. Don't get me wrong, I'm not depressed about turning 36, just reflecting on my life thus far and feeling like I've entered my era of middle-ageness (yes J, I know that's not a word). I guess that's all ok, in a kind of mundane way.

Sports and such

2008-08-27T17:02:00.008+07:00

Wow, wasn't the Olympics fantastic this year?! So many amazing athletes and exciting races, so many great events. The summer Olympics are my favorite because gymnastics is by far my favorite event, plus the swimming, diving, and track and field events are so good too. I just spent hours in front of the tv because it was just so exciting.

Oh wait! No, that wasn't me. I must have been dreaming about seeing the Olympics. Because, even though I am just one time zone away, even though I could have watched the Olympics in real time, I didn't see any of it. Not one single event. Not one flip, not one relay race, not one breathtakingly close finish. Why you may ask? Because Indonesian cable did not carry the Olympics this year - too expensive is the reason I heard. So while you were all glued to your tv sets watching the US of A take home the most medals of the Olympics (although China took home the most gold) I was here languishing in my pathetic pity party wishing that I too was enjoying the sacred Olympics. So alas, I will have to wait another 4 years before I get my fill of Olympic fever (winter Olympics doesn't do it for me nearly as much). Boo hoo hoo!

NBC has exclusive broadcasting rights in America to the Olympic games and pays dearly for this right - 600 million dollars! This amount makes up 40% of the total Olympic committee's budget. I'm not exactly sure what Indonesia would have had to pay, but I think it's about 1 million US$. Definitely not pocket change, but you'd think they would be able to make it up in advertising, especially considering Indonesia's favorite sports are represented in the summer games.

On to some little tidbits of sports trivia. Indonesia took home 5 medals this year. Two of these medals (both bronze) were in weightlifting. The other 3 (a trifecta - gold, silver and bronze) were in badminton. Had no idea, did you? Indeed, Indonesians are brilliant badminton players. They have won a gold medal in badminton ever since the sport became an official event in the 1992 Olympics. They also regularly win championships in badminton around the world, such as the All England Open Badminton Championships, the Thomas Cup, and the Uber Cup. I have yet to see a game here, but hopefully I will before we leave.

Indonesians also love soccer and it is the most popular sport. The Indonesian team has always qualified for the Asian Cup but has had only limited success. I don't think the Indonesian soccer team has ever made it into the Olympics. They also play Australia Rules Football here, although only in Australian clubs. No Indonesian team has ever played in the Australian Football International Cup.

And evidently they are good at weightlifting - that was news to me. There are a few stables around Jakarta and I know there's a polo team so equestrian sports is somewhat popular. When we went to Bandung a few weeks ago we saw a bunch of cyclists riding up the mountain, so I think cycling is somewhat popular here as well. Then of course there's golf. There are tons of golf courses in and around Jakarta, and really all over Indonesia. It's a popular sport, although I don't know how popular it is with Indonesians. The courses are pretty cheap too, so if you're a golfer this is a good place to come!

Course at Bali Golf and Country Club, rated one of Asia's 5 best courses in Fortune magazine

USA visit - first half

2008-08-20T20:06:00.000+07:00

I think I just have to catapult myself into this daunting task of writing about our enormous trip. And it really was enormous, in every sense of the word... From the long, oh so very long flights over and back, the feelings of exhaustion, the number of people with whom we visited, the number of activities, the amount of fun we had, and did I mention the exhaustion? It really was an enormously fun trip, but we definitely won't do this more than once/year.

The trip sort of got off to a bad start. We took a night flight from Jakarta to Tokyo, but no one slept well so by the time we arrived in Tokyo (8 hours later) we were all already exhausted. Our layover in Tokyo was 6 hours - far too long and in the wee hours of the morning. J and I were able to take a shower in Tokyo though so that helped to revive us bleary eyed parents. The flight from Jakarta to Dallas (12 hours) would have gone fine except that the kids slept at completely different times, so we never really got a break from the kids. One of us always had to be "on", and the other one who should sleep couldn't really sleep. After a few hour layover in Dallas, where we had to go through immigration and where J got pulled aside (he's such a criminal you know) for having been to Indonesia, Philippines, and New Zealand all in one year (a certain red flag evidently), we were off on yet another plane to Minneapolis (2 hours). By the time we arrived in Mnps, we were beyond exhaustion. My poor father, who drove 2 hours to pick us up and who was excited to tears to see us all, had to wade through unintelligible conversation in the airport and a completely passed out family of 4 on the whole drive to Eau Claire (LC never woke up from when he fell asleep on the airplane, C made it about 3 minutes into the drive before he fell asleep, and J and I made it about 5 minutes...pathetic).

And this whole trip was in business or first class. I know, I know. Totally and completely spoiled, I KNOW! And yet it was still quite miserable! I can't imagine how much worse it would have been in coach. And no, we're not able to afford first class tickets to/from Asia. J racked up a ton of miles for his job and first class actually isn't much more than business class, and yet it's soooo much nicer: 5 course meals on real china, ice cream sundays that they make by your seat, Bose headphones, real quilted blankets, and of course chairs that fold completely flat to make a pretty comfortable bed. It was so awesome. This will probably never happen again, and it was almost glorious. "Almost" glorious because the damn kids ruin things every time! :)

C enjoying his first class seat

The kids and I stayed in Wisconsin with my mom for over 2 weeks, but J had to go to NC for 1.5 weeks of work (but his ticket was paid for so we couldn't complain too much). J stayed long enough in Wisconsin to get over the worst part of the jet lag and to help me get the kids over the toughest parts. He also stayed long enough to celebrate LC's first birthday party. My little love is a one year old already, I can't believe it! We had a very nice party for him and my dad and mom and cousins and second cousins and aunts and a friend from Peace Corps all came to help us celebrate. C seemed to have a good time playing with his second cousins (is that what you call them - they're my cousin's kids...?) and we had such a nice time catching up with family. My father's side of the family lives mostly in Wisconsin and I try to see them every time I go "home" to Eau Claire. They are a really incredible group of people and I always enjoy spending time with them.

LC blowing out his bday candles with a little help from his big brother

The weather was perfect the entire time we were in Wisconsin. It rained only once and otherwise it was sunny skies and in the 70's/80's. I couldn't have asked for better weather. We were quite busy during our 2 week stay. I thought we would do a lot of relaxing and this would be our "down" time, but instead we had a lot of people to visit with and there were a lot of activities we wanted to do.

Once we took a couple days to rest after our flight, we went to the farmer's market. I really miss farmer's markets. This has been surprising because in every other developing country I've visited or lived in, going to open air markets/farmer's markets is a part of life. I fully expected that we would be buying all of our produce from open air markets here. Instead, we get everything from the super market. I also did a lot of indoor shopping during our visit. Every time the kids took a nap and some evenings after they went to bed, I'd race around town trying to get some shopping done. We can actually get just about everything in Jakarta, but not in one place and not always for a good price. Plus, we can't get American medication in Jakarta and most of the clothes are made for tiny Indonesians. It's a bit cruel to go shopping here and find you're an XL, when you're really a S or M! So, instead of spending days driving through horrible traffic in Jakarta to get some of the items on my list, I saved it up for our visit to the US. And although this was still time consuming and ate into my relaxation time, it was a lot of fun. I went to Target like 10 times, it was awesome. I'd practically give my right arm to have a Target in Jakarta.

Before J left for NC we were able to take in a Cavaliers baseball game, the Eau Claire home team. The games are very quiet and hometown, and perfect for 2 small kids. C enjoyed running around the stadium and playing with the new camera his Peepa had just given him, and LC had fun "walking" up and down the stairs and charming the other attendees. And they even watched the game once in a while... C also got to go to his first circus! We had a great time watching all the performances, eating cotton candy and slushies, and going on pony rides. C's favorite performances were the acrobats and the motorcycle show. I thought he might be a little scared of the whole thing, but he was instead enraptured.

A main activity during our stay in Eau Claire was to spend as much time as we could outside. This included many walks around my mom's beautiful neighborhood and several visits to playgrounds. One of the things we hate most about Jakarta is the lack of green space in the city. Neighborhoods do not have community parks and playgrounds like many communities in the US do, nor do streets have sidewalks or any public green spaces. And with 2 young kids and 2 parents who really enjoy walking around outside, this is a problem. Fortunately we live in an area of Jakarta that has 2 outdoor playgrounds and 2 indoor playgrounds within a 5-10 minute drive of our house. The downside is that we have to pay to use them, but at least they're really nice (the outdoor playgrounds have water features like slides and sprinkler type equipment). But still, I really miss just being able to take a long walk in a quiet, peaceful, and nice smelling area (Jakarta does not smell good), and then to stop at the free playground on the way home. Therefore, while we were in Eau Claire we made sure to take a lot of walks and to visit the wonderful and free playgrounds that dot the city.

As part of our quest to be outdoors, we also went to a few outdoor concerts. This was among my very favorite activities during our visit to WI. The university puts on free concerts every weekday at noon during the summer, and again a couple times in the evening during the week. So we would walk over (my mom lives a block from the university) and plop down on a blanket, listen to some good music, and let the kids run around. Another venue, Phoenix Park, opened up a few years ago and they also hold evening concerts during the week in the summer. These free concerts are very well attended and there are a lot of families there. Many of the young kids go down to the area just in front of the band and dance and play with bubbles, etc. And C, being the Leo that he is, joined them in the fun. He's a pretty good dancer too! There is nothing even remotely like this in Jakarta...

C enjoying an outdoor concert with Peepa

We also spent a day at our friend's house on a small quiet lake about 45 minutes north of Eau Claire. The lake doesn't allow motorboats so it is so wonderfully quiet and peaceful. We took a canoe out onto the lake and looked for frogs on the lillypads, and just enjoyed the beautifully fresh air and peacefulness. I've grown up most of my life knowing these friends of my mom's, and they are among my absolute favorites. It was a glorious day to spend all day with them relaxing by their lake.

We also spent a lot of time visiting with a few of my friends from high school who either still live in the area or came home for a visit. It's amazing to think we've been friends for 20-25 years, and that we still enjoy eachother's company so much. And speaking of long friendships, I also got to see friends of my family who I've known since I was about 7 or 8. I love meeting new people and making new friends, to learn about their experiences and their lives, but there is something so special in being able to maintain friendships for so long and to have such history with people. I value these relationships so much and feel so lucky to have these people in my life, and that they're willing to make the effort to maintain a friendship with me despite my seeming desire to live so far away! And of course, it was wonderful to spend so much time with my parents and for them to see their grandsons as much as possible. We had a fabulous time together. And my brother even flew out from Washington state for a weekend. C and I hadn't seen him since C was 4 months old, so that was a very special weekend. The most important reason for this whole visit was to reconnect with our loved ones, and I'm so glad we did. It took an amazing amount of effort, but it was well worth it.

I still have to write a post about the second half of our visit when we went to Baltimore and DC. Who knows when that will happen, but hopefully it won't take me over a month like it took me to write this one!

Happy Independence Day Indo!

2008-08-18T14:20:00.006+07:00

Yesterday, August 17, was Independence Day here in Indonesia. This date marks the declaration of Indonesia's independence from the Netherlands in 1945. The Indonesian National Revolution lasted for 4 years between Indonesia and the Netherlands, as well as some internal conflict. Fighting during this time was sporadic but violent and was one of the largest revolutions of the 20th century. The Dutch military was able to prevail in the urban areas of Java and Sumatra, but unable to do so in the rural areas throughout the country. Outside forces also influenced Indonesia's eventual success. The Netherlands was crippled by losses during the second world war and were therefore unable to pour a great deal of resources into their fight to hold on to Indonesia. In addition, the United Nations and the United States both supported Indonesia in their quest for independence. The revolution came to an end in 1949 when The Netherlands officially recognized Indonesia as a sovereign nation. If you're really interested in this topic, you can go here for a lot more information.

Indonesians take a great deal of pride in their independence and there are flags and banners all over Jakarta. Indonesians celebrate with food and family like Americans do, but grilling out is definitely not a part of the tradition. Most of the neighborhoods (and I suspect villages) in Jakarta organize their own small celebrations, and have many games for the kids to play (like potato sack races, water bobbing, etc) and have music and parties. You can also hear kids lighting fireworks throughout the night, but I don't think there's a large fireworks display hosted by the city or national government.

For us it's been a quiet and relatively lazy long weekend. Saturday we took C to see the movie Wall E, which he seemed to enjoy quite a bit. He got upset whenever Wall E was in trouble, but for the most part he laughed a lot. Saturday night J and I spent the evening saying goodbye to our very good friends in Jakarta who are moving to Oman. We're extremely sad to see them go as they're amongst a very small handful of friends who we really enjoy and can relate to, and who we really like all members of the family. Sunday we took the kids to Ancol, where Seaworld is, and had fun going through the tunnel (where you're surrounded on 3 sides by water with fish, manta rays, sharks, tortoises, etc - LC especially loved this!) and then taking a gondola ride over the beach and amusement park. And today is a lazy day (both boys are taking a nap, how wonderful!) and later today some friends will come over for a bbq. All in all, a good weekend.

A bit more on LC

2008-08-12T10:08:00.009+07:00

LC forgot to show you some more new skills - here he demonstrates riding a bobby car and saying his favorite word, ball. (And by the way, why does a mother's voice get so annoyingly high when she's talking to her child, especially on video?! Actually, I know it has to do with babies being able to hear higher pitched sounds better, which is mother nature's cool way of helping babies to learn sounds, but you'd think by 1 year of age that might stop... sorry about that.)

We also had some studio portraits taken, and while they turned out alright, they would have been better had LC wanted to stay in one spot for more than 2 seconds. However, things went better once we discovered some balls. I'll be shocked if this kid doesn't grow up loving sports...

LC's new skills

2008-08-01T20:40:00.006+07:00

I'm almost 13.5 months old and I can do lots of things! My biggest accomplishment is walking. I've been taking my own steps since I was in America in June, right around the time I turned 1. But, I haven't had the confidence to walk all the time on my own until just about 1 week ago. But once I started I don't want to do anything but walk and I rarely want any help and I almost never fall down. I was just waiting until I was really good at it before I decided to walk all the time. You can see me walk right here!

I can also say some words, sort of. I can still say my first word, "mumum" but I don't say it very often anymore. I also still say "up", which was one of my first words, and "mama" too. My favorite word is "ba" for ball. I say it all the time because I LOVE balls! They're my favorite toys! I also say "bu" for book, and "boo" for shoe. I love shoes and socks. But I say "boo" for just about everything. My mom even calls me "boo boo" sometimes cuz I say "boo" for just about any word I don't know. But I definitely say "boo" for shoe. Oh, and I say "this", and I like to point to things and say "this". That's about all I can say, but I'm understanding a lot of things!

I'm also a good little pitcher like my brother. My parents say I have a great arm, and I think they secretly hope that one of us will become a major league pitcher. Well, probably more my dad than my mom, but they both think it sometimes. I like to splash in the water a lot too and I like to go swimming. Mostly I like to try to do all the things my big brother does. I know I can't yet, and that makes me frustrated, but I still try!

I have definite opinions about things. Like when my mom or dad tries to feed me something I don't like, I scrunch up my face and shake my head from side to side and spit it out. YUCK! And I get very upset when I don't get what I want. I even throw fits and my parents laugh about it, but they try to hide that they're laughing. That doesn't make me happy either. I take my mom or dad's hand to take them somewhere when I want to go somewhere, like outside. And I won't let them read me a book that I don't want to read. I have revolving favorite books, and they have to read those books to me or else I won't let them read. I push anything away that I don't want! My favorite books right now is an animal sounds book with lots of different animals and the sounds they make, and a picture/word book of lots of different objects. My mom says it was one of my brother's favorite books too.

So now that I'm 13 months old I can do lots of different things! I'm a toddler now!

C turns FOUR!

2008-08-01T19:13:00.011+07:00

My first gorgeous son turned four years old today. I can hardly believe it. We've had a wonderful day and I'm just so proud and amazed at the incredible boy he is and is becoming. He continues to be sweet and gentle and smart, just like he has been for so long. His creativity and imagination is expanding and he especially loves to hear his nana tell him made-up stories. Additionally, for the past several months his questions have become more abundant and more challenging, as the "why" enters into the picture. For example, a couple months ago we were talking about J and I before we had him, and he asked where he was if he wasn't in my belly or born yet. Although I am nonreligious, I have to say the heaven and angels explanation for what is before there is life came in very handy! I mean, I sure wasn't expecting the "what is there before life" question from a 3 year old! Today I also told him the story of his birth, which he made me retell several times. He then asked about the day I was born and the day J was born. He is starting to grasp more complex ideas and put more and more together. Over the last few months his drawing ability has become much more interesting as well now that he can draw (for the most part) a house or a person or an animal. Yesterday he drew a picture of my head complete with eyes, ears, nose, lips and teeth. And there was also a house and a rat in the picture. Awesome. We still battle with discipline, but it feels that things have really turned around the last couple weeks. At least I don't feel like I am getting as frustrated with him as much as I was.

His birthday started off with the opening of far too many presents. I always feel we end up going overboard at holidays and his birthday. But I suppose that happens to the best of us. As you can see in the photo, he's very into superheros at the moment. He also really likes dinosaurs, which I'm pretty happy about (they're so interesting!). He still likes cars, etc. but they aren't the main focus any longer, thank goodness. I was getting so bored of cars!

For the rest of the morning he played with his new toys and then we went to the water park. We had a blast, as we have the other 2 times we've been. It was just him and me and I loved the time to have him to myself.

And when we got home our driver gave him a ride on his motorcycle, which C asked for when I asked what he wanted to do today. It was just around our housing complex, but he had fun.

And tomorrow we're off to Bandung, which is about a 2 hour drive from Jakarta. C has been asking for several months to see a volcano, and so we thought it would be a good thing to do for his birthday. So tomorrow morning we will leave for Bandung and plan to have a relaxing afternoon at the hotel or in the area. Sunday morning we will go to the volcano and take some walks around and maybe check out the hot springs.

The following weekend C's birthday extravaganza continues with his birthday party. Many of his friends are still returning from long summer trips home, so we chose to postpone his party by a week so more of his friends would be here. He also starts back at school on Monday so he is a very busy boy!

Happy Birthday sweet darling C!

Homebound and back again - photos

2008-07-13T14:56:00.009+07:00

Hello! I actually am still alive, just reeling from a whirlwind trip back to the US and being sick and trying to get my family's bodies back on Jakarta time. The huge task of writing about all we did and saw during our vacation is a daunting one, a task which I'm not quite up to yet. But, I understand you probably want to know. So, in the meantime, here are a few photos from our trip...

Traveling in style, for the first time ever. Boys, don't get used to this!

LC turns one! We had a party for him in Wisconsin. This is the aftermath of the birthday cake.

At our friend's house on Loon Lake, Wisconsin. The day was glorious.

C and me in front of the Capitol, Washington, DC. We spent a busy week being tourists and visiting with friends.

I'll try to get a post about our visit out as soon as I can. LC is still sleeping HORRIBLY since our return, we have bags yet to unpack, piles to arrange, etc.

Expat paddywack

2008-05-27T11:04:00.009+07:00

I thought you may be interested in hearing more about the expatriate (expat) community here in Jakarta. Compared to my Peace Corps days and my travels for work around Africa, the community is very different here. I had been assuming that it was an Asia - Africa difference, seeing as Asia is farther along the development road than Africa and there is far more private enterprise in Asia. I have mentioned before that my previous travels have routinely brought me in touch with expats from the development community, and few others. Here, on the other hand, it is the opposite. Only when I am at work do I meet expats from the development community. I have the definite impression that we are a relatively small bunch, completely dwarfed by private industries (oil - with all its related businesses to support it - being the big player, and then a random assortment of people in food, finance, accounting, banking, real estate development, etc).

Lately, however, when discussing this subject with friends I have learned that Jakarta (and Indonesia?) may be unique even within Asia. One woman who lived several years in Vietnam and another who has lived in Singapore and Korea said that the community here is quite clicky. They thought it may be because the community here is so large that when planning a social event you often have to choose who to invite. These women and another who lived in Mongolia said that they're surprised here by how few women work. Evidently where they've lived the wives usually held down part-time or full-time jobs, but here we are a minority. There are plenty of opportunities for partners who want to work here. While getting a work permit is difficult, it is common to work under the table. All of the men I know who have accompanied their wives here have found full-time jobs. On the other hand, there is so much to do here that there are plenty of non-work opportunities as well. You can pursue anything that interests you here and there are plenty of volunteer activities which many of the women are involved in.

When I first arrived I was amazed at how easy it was to meet people and make friends. Within a few months, however, I realized why. You have to constantly make new friends here because everyone is always leaving! A few months after I arrived I knew 3 families who were moving away. Now, a year later, there is another mass exodus. I have 5 pretty close friends who are all moving away this summer, and I know another 2 women who are also moving. Can you imagine if you lost 5 friends in one summer?! Ugh... It's a bit devastating, and I don't really feel like having to make more friends! But I will, and I must, and it will all be good. Hopefully.

I have to say this may be the number 1 reason why the expat life may not be for me for the long term. Many of my friends here plan to do this for their foreseeable future, probably until their kids are out of school. We've thought about it. There are many, many advantages to this sort of life. On the other hand, being away from family and close friends is really difficult, and the constant ferris wheel of revolving friendships that defines the expat life is draining. Like everything in life, there is give and take, and it's just a matter of figuring out which gives and which takes are the most important.

Mother's Day Jakarta style

2008-05-17T20:33:00.004+07:00

We went to our favorite place for brunch last Sunday to celebrate Mother's Day. We went with some friends who live in our complex, so it was a tame, relatively small gathering and very enjoyable. Brunches here are amazing events. All of the big hotels do a Sunday brunch. They're all very similar and about the same price, but some have separate kids rooms or no kids rooms at all. Food wise there aren't many differences, so really any of them are very nice. We like to go to the 4 Seasons because of the variety of food they present and because there's a kids room attached to the main room. We took my mom there when she was visiting and she can attest to how amazing it is. There is a huge selection of breads and cheeses, fresh juices, salads, Indonesian, Chinese and Western foods, sushi, pan fried foie gras, soups, a huge dessert buffet with chocolate fondue, and for about $5 extra all the champagne you can drink. One of these days we'll go without the kids and take advantage of that!

So brunch was very nice, delicious, and filling. The rest of the day kinda sucked thanks to C being a brat. But oh well, at least there were some high points.

The boys at brunch wishing me a happy mother's day!

Annoyed

2008-05-15T15:07:00.010+07:00

I'll start this post out with admitting that everything is annoying me these days. So, of course, why wouldn't a sweet innocuous little memoir on motherhood by Anna Quindlin not annoy me as well? I'll get to that in a bit...just let me say that I'm tired. Really, just very very tired of my life right now. Nothing seems to be going great and yet I don't have anything significant to complain about. So yes, I'm tired of x, y, and z, and yet I'm also tired of my internal dialogue complaining about how tired I am of everything! I'm obviously having one of those low weeks where you want to crawl into your shell with a lot of good movies and good books and really good ice cream and get away from your life and your thoughts for just a couple days. A deserted and beautiful resort in the mountains sounds perfect, but a place where I don't have to deal with another human being but am completely pampered. Yes, that sounds nice. Really really nice.

So this sweet little memoir I referred to...why is it annoying me? Read the excerpt below and I'll explain...

"But the biggest mistake I made is the one that most of us make while doing this. I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of the three of them, sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages 6, 4 and 1. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less."

I am not so annoyed that I can't agree with it, because I do. What aggravates me is that I do agree with it, and I'm living it now, but if she truly remembered correctly she probably thought the same thing as she was "doing" but still had to focus on the getting it done too! Yes, wouldn't it be nice to think about how lovely it was to sit on that blanket on the perfectly warm and sunny summer day with your 3 beautiful children playing perfectly all around you. And there is the mom, sitting prettily in her perfect white dress with a sweet smile on her face, basking in the glory of her perfect children and the perfect day and everything is so glorious that she has the time to enjoy the smell and the warmth and the sounds of her children and not think about another thing...

WRONG! Dear Anna, first of all that is not how it all came down. Maybe it was warm but you had to keep repositioning the blanket because it kept getting in the sun and it would be too hot. The cold food and the hot food was luke warm. There were ants and flies and odd flying beetle things buzzing all around you. Your 6 year old was constantly tormenting your 4 year old, knowing all the right buttons to push and pretending that she knew it all and was the boss. Your 4 year old was whining about said 6 year old, about the heat, about the food, about not having his toys, about wanting to go inside, about... And your 1 year old was exhausting you. She couldn't walk yet but wanted to be on the move all the time, so you were spending the entire time running after her and trying to keep her from eating the grass and getting underfoot of the other 2 kids. So here you are, trying to feed your 3 children in the sun with bugs flying all around listening to them bicker and constantly getting up to remove your baby from wandering too far or eating too much grass and all you could think about was how nice it will be when they're asleep and you can have a moment of peace and quiet before you have to clean the dishes and pay the bills and remember the 100 things you have to do but wait, gee!, I should be enjoying this moment in my life because before I know it they won't want anything to do with me and then they'll be out of the house. Right?

Or maybe it's been so long and she's so delusional that she actually misses that too. She misses the constant and emotionally draining sleep deprivation and the constant running to keep up with her life and the Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde that are her children. Maybe she does. And maybe I will too. But right now I'm just really tired of this existence and what I'd really like is some good long deep sleep.

LC kept us up half the night and it's not like it's been a long time since that happened before. He's the most random sleeper despite having had a very constant and set routine most of his life. Mostly he does ok. Mostly I get sleep. Not enough sleep, usually not totally uninterrupted sleep or past the break of dawn sleep, but I get some. So when these bad nights happen they just push me back farther into the sleep deprivation bank and I'm back to running on empty. LC is on his 4th ear infection and has 4 teeth pushing through (2 of those are already out somewhat thank god). I'm working on 11 months of sleep deprivation, for the 2nd year in the last 4 years, and it's taking its toll. I'm tired.

I'm tired of my job. I'm frustrated daily with trying to manage a US government funded project largely by myself, part-time, with no in-country support and from my home. With 2 young children it is nearly impossible to get my hours in during a normal day and without constant interruption by family or home demands. Since we lost our nanny (we have a new one) C has been especially demanding on my time and doesn't want to play with anyone but me. So it is a constant stream of whining and complaining from him all afternoon. And to him work is not a credible reason for not playing with him. I am tired of not having more support for a very demanding position. I am tired of not being able to schedule the non-work part of my days because work demands often take precedent should they come up. (Fortunately my work life has an end date in sight - more on that another time)

I am tired of our lonely social life. Not since college have I had so many friends and done so much socially, and yet it's been a very long time since I've been so lonely. I like my friends here, but it is a pretty superficial friendship. I don't have a single friend here with whom I'd share truly personal thoughts. I just don't have much in common with them. Most of my friends here don't have a career and haven't worked in years. Most of them also have had no exposure to the international development world so for this reason and because a career isn't important to them I can't talk with them about my work. Most of them also don't volunteer or even take classes or anything. They go to playgroups, they go to the spa, they go shopping, they go out with friends and drink too much and make sure their nanny comes in early the next day so they can recover in peace. It's not that they're living a pampered life that I have a hard time with, I guess it's just that what do I have to talk about with them? We talk about kids, where we bought furniture, where to go on vacation. It just gets old. I have a few friends who do work in my field, but they work full time so we only occasionally see them on the weekends. Indonesia is a strange place for expats. There are so many here, there is so much going on, it's very easy to meet people but difficult to find people with whom you have a lot in common. And I never thought it would be so hard to meet people more like me and J. Every other country I've worked in I have been surrounded by the development community. But here we really are in the minority. The oil companies and private enterprise are much bigger players.

I suppose my whinge fest is over. I'm not even sure this entry is worth posting. I hate listening to myself whinge and whine when I know I'm so blessed in so many ways. But I guess it's part of the sharing and the whole - just how are J and B doing over there on the other side of the planet? We're doing alright, hanging in there, trying to get through the days like most of you I suppose, just with a couple different twists. So enough of the bla, bla, bla...

I still have to write about what's been going on at work and about my trip to Bangkok. I will get to it, I promise. And I'm sure it will be far more interesting than this post was!

Mother's Day

2008-05-10T14:27:00.002+07:00

In honor of Mother's Day (and really all women), I'm posting a poem by Maya Angelou. Many of you have probably already seen it - it gets passed around the information highway regularly. But it's a really good one, so it's worthy of reading again. Thanks to Pinko Grammy for sending it recently as a nice reminder.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... a youth she's content to leave behind...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... a past interesting enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age....
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..... a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her guests feel honored....
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... a feeling of control over her destiny...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to fall in love without losing herself..
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to quit a job, break up with a loser, and confront a friend without; ruining the friendship...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... when to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... that she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her children..
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... that her childhood may not have been perfect...but its over...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... what she would and wouldn't do for love or anything else...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to live alone... even if she doesn't like it...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.. . whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... where to go... be it to her best friend's kitchen table... or a charming inn in the woods... when her soul needs soothing...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... what she can and can't accomplish in a day... a month...and a year...

I love you MOM!

LC News Update

2008-05-07T20:31:00.010+07:00

Ever since we moved to Indonesia I've wondered which language our baby's first word would be. This thought was followed with a question as to whether I would even recognize the word if it were in Bahasa Indonesia. Afterall, my Indonesian language ability is dismal so it wouldn't be surprising if LC was talking up a storm in Indonesian and I didn't have a clue! As you're most likely guessing by now, I finally have my answer. (Well, this is aside from the "mama" and "dada" sounds he started making a couple months ago) It turns out that LC is going to be quite the Bahasa Indonesia speaker!

Over the last several days I've wondered why LC would call for me - "mama" - as I'd prepare his food. But it wasn't quite "mama", but more like "mumum". So I thought, well there are a lot of Aussies around so maybe he picked up "mum" instead of "mom". No, silly big-headed mom, it turns out it's not all about me. It dawned on me that when he said "mumum" he wasn't saying "mama" at all. I finally remembered that "mumum" is how Indonesians say "food" when talking to babies. So when it's time to eat, LC is saying the word "food" in Bahasa Indonesia!

In other LC news, he has started throwing fits. And I bet he's one of the best fit throwers in the under one crowd. Wow. It's really impressive. I've actually had to just put him down on the floor and let him get it out of his system cuz the kid is in an entire world of his own. And what spurs these fits you may ask? Not getting what he wants of course! I just don't remember C having this kind of temper tantrum until he was 2, but evidently it's not that uncommon. Fortuitously I received an update for his age group from Babycenter.com this week, and one of the topics was temper tantrums. I guess month 10, week 2 is when babies start to lose it! Well, it's not fun, let me tell you.

LC went to his first swimming lesson yesterday. He did better than C ever did. I want to make sure I don't miss my window of opportunity like I seemed to have done with C. LC seemed to like the class in general. I know he's not capable of swimming yet - god knows he'd sink like a ton of bricks he's so big! (The teacher commented at the class - Wow, he's a strong boy isn't he?!) But I want him to feel comfortable in the water and learn how to swim at the earliest time. With so many pools in this country it scares me to have two boys running around who don't know how to swim. And my expectations aren't too high - ALL of C's friends can swim, most of them unaided by floaties. So he is way behind the 8 ball and I don't want to see LC end up in the same place. But we'll take it casually as there's no rush.

I'm quite sure LC has more bumps and bruises than C ever did at his age. There are 2 big reasons for this: our being distracted by an older son and us having the hardest floors possible (marble). I never thought I'd think that hardwood floors were soft, but compared to marble they definitely are! Thankfully he has a rock hard head so nothing major has happened, that we know of... He also isn't content with baby toys, hasn't been in a long time. He's already playing with the toys that C was playing with when he was twice his age, and he doesn't want anything to do with those silly baby toys. So it was frustrating for a couple months trying to figure out what things he would enjoy, but now that he's more mobile, stronger, and has broader interests it isn't too much of a struggle.

He's still crawling and cruising, and is thinking about walking but I don't expect he will do it in the next month or so. So far he's been a couple weeks behind C in all the big gross motor development milestones so I guess I'm thinking he'll do it at about 13 months. Which means we'll have aching backs during our trip to the US when he'll want to walk everywhere but won't be able to yet. Ouch...

Some random thoughts: in general I have to say he's at a wonderful age and is so much fun to be with. He makes all kinds of fantastic squeals and babble (in addition to speaking Bahasa Indonesia!) and has a totally infectious laugh. He loves our cat most of all I think (with a very close second being his big brother), and the 2 are so funny together. He chases after her all the time, but instead of running away she lays down directly in front of him. The other day he tried to put her paw in his mouth. I can't tell you why, but everything does go in his mouth afterall! He wants to move! and do! all the time now so sitting still is not a common occurrence. He does the cutest thing whenever he sees a pillow. He automatically goes over to it and lays his head down and gives us this adorable sheepish grin as if to say - I know you can hardly stand it when I do this cuz you think I'm the most cutest baby in the whole wide world! And of course he's right. :)

C-ism of the day

2008-05-01T20:24:00.005+07:00

C and LC were playing on the couch. C says to LC: "I'm so proud of you LC - you have hair now!"

C followed this with about 3 "I love yous" for his brother. Awww!

Plastic bags and the Go Green craze

2008-04-30T13:00:00.006+07:00

It has been nice to see the number of articles in various mainstream magazines and newspapers devoted in some way or another to environmental conservation concerns. There are of course the places you'd expect to see them, like National Geographic, but then there are also magazines like People (that's right folks, I read People. Afterall, I need to get my fix of America popculture!) that have been publishing more and more related articles.

In the April 28 issue of People there is an article on the plastic bag ban. San Francisco became the first city in the US last December to outlaw disposable plastic bags. As of now it only effects large grocery and drugstore chains, but that most likely addresses the bulk of the plastic bags being distributed. Similar bans have already occurred in cities in Ireland, India, and Bangladesh. Similar programs, albeit voluntary, have been instituted in Australia and Taiwan has passed a law requiring retailers to charge customers for plastic bags and utensils. As a result, Taiwan has seen a 69% drop in use of these products. In addition, the country of China recently cracked down on plastic bag use by outlawing the manufacture and distribution of very thin bags, and requires retailers to sell any plastic bags distributed. Over 12 US cities and four states are currently considering similar plastic bag bans.

The concerns regarding plastic bags are many-fold. It is estimated that consumers use between 500 billion to 1 trillion plastic bags every year; in the US it is estimated to be between 20 - 100 billion. These bags in America are manufactured using more than 12 million barrels of oil! And sadly, only a small percentage are recycled. And the rest? You could still see them littering our lands and water 1,000 years from now. In addition, thousands of sea creatures (whales, sea turtles, seals) are killed every year after ingesting plastic bags.

A few grocery stores I know of are actively recommending the use of alternatives to disposable plastic bags. Whole Foods has recently completely stopped using disposable plastic bags. They sell inexpensive recycled plastic bags at their stores, and encourage you to use your own bags by discounting your bill by 5 cents/bag. And if you don't have a bag, you can still use their 100% recycled paper bags. Another one of my favorite stores, Trader Joe's, still offers paper and plastic bags but also sells cotton bags. I would think they'd follow Whole Food's lead in the near future though. Additionally, Ikea charges 5 cents for plastic bags.

Personally, we have just started using a reusable bag for our groceries. Like most people, about 92% of Americans, we reuse our disposable plastic bags for various things, mostly to carry something somewhere or to throw other things away. So we probably just reuse them once. Better than nothing, but not good enough. I had been considering using reusable bags for years, but even after putting some cotton totes into our car I'd forget to bring them into the store. However, with the increased press on the environment, a paper bag stocked full of plastic bags, and my recent purchase of a very cool bag, our family is trying to be more committed to not contributing so much to the billions of plastic bags used every year.

Our new, very cool bag is made from non-recyclable plastic waste that is collected by trash pickers in Jakarta. A project called XSProject buys the waste from the trash pickers, providing them with extra income. The project then collaborates with other organizations and small cottage industries to recycle the waste and construct different size totes. And guess what? It looks like you can buy some of these bags in the US!

As you may imagine, Indonesia doesn't have a recycling program. However, a friend in my complex is looking into having our management company install bins for recyclables to be picked up by XSProject (I think). It would feel so good to not have to throw all of our waste into the trash! I'll write more about that if it materializes.

So jump on the bandwagon if you haven't already - start using re-usable bags today!

The Stupid Iraq War and other musings

2008-04-21T15:52:00.017+07:00

I have no intention of this blog becoming a regular political outlet for me to complain or lament our current situation, or to cheer those occasional things that go right. However, I am somewhat political so these ideas and emotions are there, and sometimes they just need to burst out. It is probably a good thing for all of our sakes that I don't let this become my own personal griping outlet. I can get pretty annoying and passionate about some issues, to which J would certainly attest. For example, my friend Emily, of Lovely and Amazing fame, recently posted a rant about SCHIP program funds being cut. Well, I could fume on and on and on about that one, but since Emily already did such a good job of it you can read it here if you're interested. So, if you are someone who actually thinks it's a good thing we're embroiled in this huge, multibillion dollar lie and mess they call a war (who could you possibly be???), then you may not like most of what I have to say today (although it's really not that offensive).

The reason for the political outburst today is because J and I watched In the Valley of Elah a couple nights ago and it was a really, really good movie. It is the story of a father trying to find his son who just recently returned from Iraq. It stars Tommy Lee Jones as the father, Susan Sarandon as the mother, and Charlize Theron as the detective. What makes it especially poignant is that the story is based on actual events. The truth of what happened to the son, and what happened to him during his tour in Iraq, is tragic in so many ways. For most of you, because I know who you are, the truth won't be that shocking. It's part of the reason why we hate war in the first place, why it should never be entered into as lightly as it was, and why we think the government is doing such a pathetic job of fighting this war and taking care of our troops. What does surprise me is this last part. I don't understand how anyone, whether you're for this war or against it, isn't forcing the military to do a better job of taking care of its troops both while they're on duty and once they return.

This movie did a really wonderful job of pointing out these flaws and of pointing to the horror these boys and girls and men and women have to face on a daily basis while they're there, and of the continuing internal horror they face once they've returned. What I especially loved about the movie is how it accomplishes this both very overtly, but also very subtly. You'll understand what I mean if you watch the movie. Which you really should do.

Onto some segues... After watching the movie I wanted to discuss it with J. I was in tears and very upset and couldn't help but imagine that it was my son in the story. I didn't relate much to the family, but I do have 2 sons and it scares the living crap out of me to think that they could one day be drafted into war, or even join of their own volition. It's not a big stretch to imagine this. So this is what I attempted to discuss with J. I asked if watching this movie enraged him like it does me, to see what this war did to this mother's/father's son and to other mother's/father's sons, to know that we're spending billions of dollars on this lie instead of on improving our health care or education, etc. which is in such desperate need. But he wasn't. Or rather, this movie didn't make him feel that way. And he didn't relate in imagining that boy being our C or LC. It became evident to me, and has before many many times, how differently we see things. Part of the reason we see things differently, I think, is the male vs. female perspective.

And this is why I can't help but wonder about the current Democratic party nomination choices. Firstly I'll admit that I haven't paid close attention to it. This is one of the benefits or drawbacks of living overseas, depending on how you view it. It's easy to ignore what's happening back home. So I point this out because I couldn't tell you how the candidates really differ on key issues. But I will also add that many of my friends who do pay attention say there aren't huge differences anyway, and honestly this had already been my impression so far. If Hillary wins, fantastic, if Barack wins, that's cool too.

Why I'm bringing this up is because of what one of my pro-Barack friends said. He sent out a Vote for Obama email and added, "Vote for Change". It's this last bit that I don't entirely agree with. Yes Hillary is seen as being too entrenched in Washington politics, and perhaps this is true. On the other hand I think it would be good to have someone with substantial experience leading the country. Barack also has a very international background which of course I respect, and he could bring a very interesting perspective to the White House. And yes, he's not white. Maybe this will make a difference too. But when it comes down to it, he's still got a penis. And this is where my previous conversations relate to each other.

Speaking in generalities here, a woman, especially a mother, would be far less likely to enter into war. The reason is because she can, very easily and without much of a jump, imagine if it were her child she were sending to war. She can imagine, in her heart, in her head, in her bones, that it was her friend or sister or brother's child going into war. She can imagine, without stretching that imagination past a 2 second thought, that it was the corner grocer's son or her nurse's daughter going to war. I'm not saying at all that men don't think these thoughts, because of course they do. What I'm saying is it just doesn't seem to be the same. And that's the kind of change I'd like to see in the White House. I'd like to see first hand a president who has birthed a child and who has struggled as a working mother in this totally unsupportive society we have. A woman does see things differently. The issues that she deems most important often do differ from what a man might see as being most important. Did you know that a woman who has been pregnant will never lose a part of that child in her body? Meaning that I will always, for the rest of my life, have C's and LC's cells running through my body. I think that's so cool, and so poignant! I'd like to see the changes this woman would make. I think having a woman as president could show more change than a man. (And relating to the SCHIP rant, at least Hillary tried to address the health care issue! No one else is willing to go near that monster, despite how desperately we need to!)

Onto yet another segue, and another review. Don't worry, there is relevance. I've recently read Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys, which is a guide to helping boys develop their emotional skills rather than destroying them, as our society seems to value. The authors, psychologists, illustrate the research and recommendations with anecdotal examples from their work with boys. The book includes chapters on boys in our educational system, in our culture, relationship with mothers (which I found particularly interesting), relationship with fathers, etc. I consider this book, or one with similar content, to be a must-read for any parent of boys. We've been so focused on increasing the opportunities for girls (which was needed) that we forgot about what was happening to our boys (big mistake).

I think the book has been personally helpful. While most of the recommendations were not "new" to me, as they feel like common sense and based on how I was brought up, some parts were quite enlightening. For example, the chapter on boys in school was very useful, and I'll be sure to read it again in a couple years when C starts kindergarten and may come up against similar struggles as were described in this chapter. I also appreciated the chapter on mothers with sons, because I don't "know" boys the way I "know" girls - I can use the help!

And the relevance? Do I need to spell it out? Well, we send our boys off to war without any emotional training on how to deal with the horrors they see. They're ill equipped to begin with, and then we make them do and see incredible atrocities. And then we bring them back, hopefully, with no skills on how to reassimilate or how to make peace with their life in Iraq. This is the tragedy that happened in In the Valley of Elah, a tragedy that maybe we could help prevent by encouraging our boys to listen to and express their emotions and to support them rather than criticize. On a side note, while looking for a link to this book I found a nifty page on PBS with other information, guides, etc from Raising Cain.

What a bonus! You got a political rant, movie review, and book review all in one little post!

Red wagon, red wagon

2008-04-17T17:08:00.004+07:00

Going for a ride around the neighborhood.

And because I find it impossible to get a photo of both of them, at the same time, smiling and looking in my direction...

Another C-ism

2008-04-16T16:59:00.002+07:00

My mom reminded me of another C-ism from when she was visiting.

From time to time C would get mad at Nana (my mom) for who knows what or because she wouldn't do/give him what he wanted. When he would get mad at her he would cross his arms, pout and say "FINE! just fine...you disappoint me Nana" and walk away with folded arms. He would then come back in 30 seconds and say, "Are you sorry Nana?" She'd respond with a no (and a laugh) and he'd walk away again in a huff. A few seconds later he'd return once more and ask again, "Are you sorry YET Nana?". Then they'd resolve the matter and be off again with another story or another activity.

Loss

2008-04-12T14:30:00.005+07:00

I'm tempted to use words like "devastation", "crushing", "disastrous", and other equally extreme words to describe the way I feel right now. And then I check myself because these are not appropriate words at all, considering the truly devastating, crushing and disastrous events that happen in people's lives. So, more appropriately, I am sad, I am feeling a great loss, I am shocked, and I am disappointed and concerned about the immediate future.

Our wonderful, fantastic, nearly perfect nanny E quit today. I just said goodbye to her 20 minutes ago. This was a bombshell this morning; I didn't see it coming at all. I was pretty sure she was happy here, I knew that we got along well and she was friends with our other staff, and I knew we paid her well. On the other hand, she speaks English better than any other nanny/maid I've met here, and she is smart and uses common sense, which is also hard to come by here. Knowing this there was always a thought in the back of my mind that it wouldn't last forever. But, I had hope that she would be with us as long as we stay in Indo. I had plans that if she had a baby she could bring him/her to work, or once LC was going to school some mornings we could help her pay for classes if she wanted to further her education, etc. Just random thoughts and plans for helping her reach whatever goals she has for her life. Instead, however, she had an offer we can't compete with.

She worked for a family in Taiwan for 3 years long ago, so she speaks Taiwanese and some Mandarin (in addition of course to Javanese, Bahasa Indonesia, and English - like I said, she's very skilled). Some agent contacted her a couple months ago to ask her to move to Taiwan to work for a family who was having a hard time finding a good maid who speaks Taiwanese and English. She debated for a long time, as this move means leaving her husband and family, and a job she likes. But the extra money she'll earn (almost 4 times what we pay her) will go a long ways toward helping her and her husband to buy a house and hopefully start a family soon after. I understand this, and I'm happy for her that she'll be able to earn more money. I'm not excited for her exactly, because I know she's giving up a lot to go.

Life is tough. Is life ever easy for any adult? I suppose if you compare hardships on this planet then yes, of course, life is easy for some. Losing family members, struggling against starvation or HIV/AIDS or poverty, losing the life you know due to war, etc...these are hardships. This is when you use the terms devastation, disaster, crushing. However, life is totally relative. In comparison, some of us live very blessed lives, which if we are honest with ourselves and aware of the world around us, we are thankful for. But this doesn't mean we don't experience hardships relative to the life we live. E has had to make a tough decision, and it will be hard on her and her family for the next couple years until she returns. This will be their hardship, and ours to a lesser degree as well. But hopefully it will be a relatively easy hardship, and in the end she will attain the goals she wants for her and her family.

We will really miss her. She had become like a member of our family. And maybe, just maybe we will be able to find a replacement who is almost as good.

C-isms

2008-04-11T13:57:00.000+07:00

Here are a couple "C-isms" - funny little things C says or does. Unfortunately most of them happen randomly and I don't write them down, and so I forget them soon after. But here are just a couple that I managed to remember.

C: "The poop isn't coming out"

B: "Why not?"

C: "Maybe it's sleeping"

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J, randomly singing "Watcha, watcha, watcha watcha want, want..."

C: "Sandwiches!"

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School sends home a weekly report and a monthly book of the artwork and writing that C does. There are a few gems from this past month:

In practicing his listening skills, C said that "beautiful means something that makes your heart happy". Um, do I have the sweetest 3 year old EVER?!

C is quite taken with dinosaurs, volcanoes and monsters . They've even replaced cars as his favorite things to play with and draw. So you'll see a theme here in his drawings:

- writing an R with some other squiggles: "This is an R monster. It doesn't have legs"

- a drawing similar to that above but with more lines and squiggles: "It's mommy. She is going to see a volcano with Nana. They are going to see a big volcano, but it didn't explode."

- a drawing of a dinosaur, and a pretty good drawing at that: "This is a dinosaur. He is mad. He is stomping his feet. He is mad because the other dinosaurs are not happy and he is going to kill them." (I'm not thrilled with the "killing" talk but I guess that's bound to happen when talking about dinosaurs and monsters.)

- a drawing of 2 flowers: "This is a flower. It has legs and poo coming out. She forget to go to the toilet."

- a drawing of a baby (big head and face and 2 legs. No body, who needs a body?!): "This is my brother. He is not crying. He is smiling. He has two arms, two legs, two eyes, one nose and a mouth".

Photo of C going on his first school field trip

Independent C

2008-04-06T14:51:00.005+07:00

Recently it feels that C is really asserting his independence and growing up in a big way. This past week there were several occasions when I felt my first little baby boy slipping through my fingers, being replaced by this Big Boy. Earlier in the week C had a play date at a friend's house. He's been to friend's houses before of course, but someone from our house had always been with him at the house. When we were discussing the plans for him to go to the friend's house, I asked our nanny to pick him up from school and then ask C whether he wanted her to go with him or not. I already had the feeling that he wouldn't want her to stay. When they got to his friend's house the nanny walked him inside and evidently he told her very strongly that she was not to stay and he could stay there by himself!!!

Then, a couple days later I came home to find C playing at home with 3 kids from the complex who are between the ages of 8-10. He was totally in his element, blabbering away to them, showing him his house and his cat and his baby brother and his fish, etc. It was very cute, helped greatly by the fact these kids are just as sweet as C. Then one of them today came knocking on our door to see if he could play (I'm sure he wasn't her first choice, but it still made me and him happy) There are many wonderful aspects about this complex, and I think the opportunity for C and LC to play with kids of varying ages is one of them. I think most kids of that age wouldn't give preschoolers the time of day, but in this complex they often play together.

Then on Saturday C and I went with some friends to a big water park in Jakarta. We had a blast! And C was game to go on all the big boy slides and was much less hesitant than he normally is. Of course I still had to go down all the slides with him, but just the same he wasn't afraid to go down them in the first place. We even flipped over at the bottom of one of them (going down on an intertube) and we both were totally submerged. He was frightened about the experience but he was still willing to go down it again.

So this week has been full of events proving that C is really growing up. I'm mostly happy. Of course I don't want him to stay little forever and especially with having to take care of LC I need him to become more independent, etc. But he's still my first baby and it's a little hard to watch him becoming his own little guy who doesn't need his mom as much as he did before. It's a positive step though, and hopefully the free flowing hugs and kisses I receive from him won't stop for a long time to come.

Lombok and beyond

2008-03-25T17:16:00.016+07:00

I can't remember if I've talked about this before (or if it was just a post milling about in my head that never got put down on "paper"), but one thing I really appreciate about Indonesia is the government's recognition of the multiple religions that are practiced here. One way they recognize this is through national holidays. Two of these holidays were last week (creating a very lovely 4 day weekend): one was Muslim, and the other Christian (good friday). The downside, in some respects, is this creates so many public holidays it can be difficult to get work done. But overall I think it is very smart to be so tolerant, at least officially (and in practice, in all my interactions in Indonesia so far).

J and I have decided that we need to try to get out of Jakarta more often. It is such a huge, noisy, cumbersome, polluted city that we need to get more "breaks". Having a 4 day weekend was therefore too great an opportunity to pass up. We had hoped to tack a trip to Thailand on to my planned but at that time unconfirmed work trip to Bangkok. Unfortunately confirmation was very late in arriving, and by that time the flights were already either booked or expensive. So, we decided to go instead to Lombok, the island east of Bali. We had heard good things about it, that it was beautiful with nice beaches, and quieter and less built up than Bali.

By the time we booked our trip many flights were already sold out. So, we were forced to extend our holiday to 6 days rather than 4 (oh, poor us!). With 5 nights available we decided to stay 3 nights on Lombok and 2 nights on an island off of Lombok that I had also heard about, Gili Trawangan. Our quick assessment - skip Lombok and head straight to the Gilis!

Lombok is indeed quieter than Bali. This is a good thing in general, except that it felt slower in a bit of a sad way. There were still hawkers, and they seemed a little desperate for business. Streets were pretty bare and shops opened late. But, it is low season and it was a holiday, so this might not be a very good assessment given the time of year. It's also not as unique as Bali. The Hindu religion gives Bali much of its flavor and since Lombok is predominently Muslim it didn't exude that extra color. On the other hand, the beaches are more beautiful and less crowded. On our drive between our hotel and the port to go to Gili T, we saw some gorgeous postcard-perfect beaches. And they were totally undeveloped and empty - just beaches that butted up against people's farm land or where local fisherman docked their boats. Lombok is also somewhat mountainous, so the views really were amazing.

We stayed at the Holiday Resort in Senggigi, which was a good deal. It was a bit run down, but nice enough for a good price. We stayed in a 2 bedroom apartment, and the resort has a big pool, kiddie pool, playground and kids club (staffed indoor play area) so there were plenty of distractions for C. I also have to admit that we brought our nanny along. With a 3.5 year old and a 9 month old, vacations don't tend to be very relaxing and it's hard to do anything around a baby's nap schedule. So, the vacation cost a bit more but we had a much better experience. We'll be doing that again.

We spent a half-day touring around the island near Senggigi. There's a lot to see actually, like Mount Rinjani and Kuta, but we elected to stay closer to our part of the island so we would spend less time in a car. After all, C tolerates car rides for only so long... One of our destinations was the "Monkey Forest", which consisted of a roadside stop where we could feed monkeys peanuts (or bananas, which oddly enough they seem to really like! Who knew, monkeys like bananas). I think the word "forest" is taking it too far, but C had a good time feeding them peanuts and they were quite civil and polite monkeys - unlike the monkeys we've come across in Bali. Those Bali Monkeys, they're so naughty. Bad Bali Monkeys, Bad! (okay, I've had way too much coffee today) I fed some of them peanuts as well, and always tried to give them to the pregnant monkeys or the new moms. And this is why I can't sit through an episode of Oprah without crying. I even started crying today at one sentence written in a fictional account of Heath Ledger's (very tragic death) last few days in an article in Esquire magazine. I'm guessing there are few tears ever spilled whilst reading Esquire magazine, but leave it to me... (I know my mother is now grinning ear to ear because she can just imagine the day when my kids tease me mercilessly because I won't be able to sit through 2 minutes of some sappy show like Little House on the Prairie, without crying). So hear I am, miss bleeding heart, making sure the more vulnerable monkeys are fed as well. We also stopped by a traditional Indonesian market on our drive, which was similar to the markets you find all over Africa.

We also visited a Hindu temple called Pera Muru and the Water Palace, which was a pavilion-like building in the middle of a man-made lake where the king would conduct business. We then headed to a pottery making village (in Bali and Lombok villages specialize in one craft, so especially in Bali you see shop after shop of the same thing). The pottery is special to Lombok so the designs were different than most of what I see around Jakarta. And that concludes our busiest day during our vacation.

Getting to Gili Trawangan (Gili T) is not an easy task. We got on a chartered minibus jam packed with people and luggage for about 1 hour. Then they dropped us off at a cafe near the port for us to have a drink while we waited for our boat to arrive. We then had to go a short ways to the port - J started haggling with the driver of a cimodo (horse and buggy) about the price to take us and the luggage to the port. He haggled over 50 cents. While his wife, baby, and 3 year old were waiting in the late morning sun sweating to death. We're not in Peace Corps anymore HONEY! After convincing J that it was worth an extra 50 cents, we arrived at the port to find that our boat wasn't there, so we waited. And waited. Until they told us we would take a public boat, not a chartered boat like we had been told.

Let me take a quick break and tell you that Indonesians don't generally get mad. At least they don't show it, and in the view of an American they don't stick up for themselves. If there is an injustice done to them by a business, for example, they won't argue very much, and they definitely won't raise their voices. You can see where I'm going with this. For those of you who know my husband, these 2 perspectives don't mesh very well (and don't very well with me either for that matter). So, there was some arguing, maybe some yelling, and finally we boarded a public boat that wasn't quite full but that we got to leave anyway.

The boat ride was fine. We made it to Gili T, stepped out into the water, and waded to shore with our suitcases and children dangling from our arms. I wish we had a video of it, I'm sure it was a miserable site. We were then whisked away into a cimodo (also a hilarious site - 5 people, 2 big suitcases, and a few bags stuffed into a cart) for a 3 km ride to our hotel. We stayed at Alam Gili, a sister hotel to the place my mom and I stayed in Ubud. It just opened in December so it was in perfect shape. The staff were true to the Alam hotel chain style - absolutely lovely. And best of all, it was so beautiful and serene and quiet. It's so quiet because there are no motorized vehicles allowed on the island. The only means of transportation are the cimodos, bikes, and feet. As soon as we arrived I started planning when we could return.

We mostly just relaxed. We walked on the beach, looked for seashells and coral, played in the water, and read magazines. J and I also went snorkeling and had a quiet dinner alone on the beach. We took C into "town" once for dinner and walked around a bit - not much there but a few decent restaurants, hotels, and dive shops. There were other families at our hotel, including a British family with 3 boys who had just moved to Jakarta the week before. They were fun and C helped them to hide Easter eggs for the hotel staff to find. I think the staff enjoyed the Easter egg hunt more than kids usually do!

All in all a very successful vacation.

And now I promise to give the travel blogging a rest for at least one post.

February photos

2008-03-18T17:48:00.005+07:00

A few photos from February.

Bali

VolcanoOur pretty toes in the sand
This is how beautiful the Balinese make their lives... There are even fresh flowers decorating the toilet paper dispensers.

Back in Jakarta
Snake swallowing a chicken
LC's first visit to the zoo

Bathing boys

Moms visit

2008-03-11T21:01:00.009+07:00

The hecklers are heckling and the audience is growing restless. It has been a long time since my last post. My attentions have been focused on work and my mom and so I do apologize my friends. I will try to get us back to our regularly scheduled program.

My mom's visit was very successful. Well, it was mostly successful. She spent the first week sick with high fever and exhaustion and hardly able to play with her grandsons. She was incredibly frustrated and so was C (I ended up having to work quite a bit). So her visit didn't really seem to start until her 2nd of 4 weeks.

Her 2nd week she and I spent 5 glorious days alone in Bali without husband or children. That's right, 5 days without attachments in lush beautiful Bali, playing with my mom. We first headed to Ubud, which is regarded as the art and culture center of Bali. It is in central Bali, surrounded by lush vegetation, rice paddies, and mountains and volcanoes. The town itself is pretty funky. It felt to me like a Telluride, Colorado on the beach in a different country: some fun and hippie shops and some snooty and swanky shops; paintings and pottery and wood carvings spilling out from all nooks and crannies; women wearing long flowing skirts and halter tops; and the sound of Balinese or Bahasa Indonesia on the streets. It's kind of a strange place.

We stayed at this charming little place called Alam Jiwa. The properties (there are 3 little hotels) are set in lush gardens bordering rice paddies. Our room had a Balinese bed on the veranda where we huddled for a couple hours the first night under the mosquito net during a thunder storm. We had a great time talking the night away. The staff is excellent and friendly and they serve a fantastic breakfast. My mother fell in love with their papaya juice and pancakes, and I loved their pineapple juice - best I've ever had. We were quite busy in Ubud. We spent quite a bit of time shopping, and somehow it still wasn't enough - not even for my mom who usually hates shopping. We also spent a half day learning how to batik. It was actually pretty difficult and time consuming, but it was fun. We also spent a day visiting a few of the area craft villages and having lunch overlooking a volcano.

Our next stop was the Tandjung Sari on Sanur. The hotel was a bit disappointing - not nearly as charming or interesting as the less expensive Alam Jiwa. This was to be our relaxation time at the beach, sleeping, and nice dinners. We had some of that, but I could have used more of it! We went out in a boat to go snorkeling, which is when I learned my mom doesn't really swim! You'd think a 35 year old woman would know that about her mother... So I went snorkeling and mom put her face in the water for a few minutes. The snorkeling was just ok. We went over to Seminyak to watch the sunset at La Luciola restaurant, one of my favorites on Bali. Dinner was delicious and the sunset too cloudy. We took a walk on the beach and chased crabs into the water.

The rest of my mother's visit was a medley of spa visits (my mother is addicted to the facials), local sightseeing, and playtime with the grandsons. C had an especially great time with nana. They were playing together constantly and nana was the queen of story invention. She told C all kinds of wonderful stories about dinosaurs and volcanoes (C's current obsession) and little boys and bajajs. LC became more and more comfortable with her as the time went by. Unfortunately he didn't become an efficient crawler while she was here, but he did manage to show her that he could scoot around on his belly.

And then she was gone, back to the hard cold Wisconsin winter. C went back to his boring routine and I went back to work. We all had a wonderful time and we're so happy she came for a visit!

Not much to tell you since then. I've been working too much and trying to balance it all (story of everyone's life, I know). But we have another vacation in sight. Thursday and Friday are holidays so most people take advantage of the 4 day weekend. To celebrate we're getting out of Jakarta to Lombok, an island east of Bali. I've heard great things about it and we're looking forward to some quiet and relaxation. Then I'm headed directly to Bangkok for work for a week. I've wanted to go to Thailand since I was in high school so I'm pretty excited about it. So, we're keeping busy! I'll write again in a couple weeks.

Blogging birthday

2008-02-13T13:06:00.002+07:00

I totally missed Indoprism's one year birthday (first post)! Happy birthday blog! I'm proud to say I've kept it fairly active for one entire year. I'm having fun with it and it seems to be well received, so I guess I'll keep it going! Here's hoping for another birthday next Feb.

A new addition

2008-02-11T20:43:00.000+07:00

Once again I find myself with much to say but no time to say it. My mom is here. We have a new member of the family. LC is 7 months old already. C has passed the 3.5 year mark. And J and I are approaching 12 years of being a couple. Wow.

I will report more on my mom's visit when I have some time and inclination to sit at the computer for that long. For now I leave you with a photo of Monkey, our dear little kitty cat. She is our first since our cat Fezig passed away almost 4 years ago (unfortunately the same day we celebrated our best friends' baby shower - something they are rightly not so happy about). J and I adopted Fezig from the humane society in Washington soon after we moved in together after returning from the Peace Corps. The humane society came to do a home visit before we could adopt him, something I remember being happy about but also wishing that every parent wanting to have a child would have to do as well... Anyway, so now we have another cat that was unwanted for some reason or another. A friend of mine here rescues animals and Monkey was found as a kitten, skinny and half starved with a wire wrapped around her foot that was creating all kinds of sores and some permanent nerve damage. She lived with my friend for about a year and now she's found a permanent home with us. She is affectionate and quiet and likes people. She sleeps on our bed with us and plays as young cats do. She is adjusting to C, albeit slowly. I keep trying to explain to C that chasing her and grabbing at her are not the ways to her heart. But she'll come around eventually. J tried changing her name to Charlie, as in Charlie Chaplin, due to her little mustache-like spot above her mouth. But C wouldn't allow it. So she is Monkey, our new addition. Welcome Monkey!

And this photo is just from a bit of fun with LC. He is sitting by himself completely and making crawling motions. However, given his great bulk he isn't yet able to push himself to all 4s. But I expect it won't be that long so he can chase after C, or after Monkey.

Da Boyz

2008-01-21T14:12:00.000+07:00

My little guys, as cute as ever...

C's shirt reads Big Brother and LC's says Little Brother. Unfortunately you can't tell that in the photo...

C continues to exasperate me - one minute being the cutest darn 3 year old in the world and saying the sweetest, funniest, most wonderful things. And the next? Argh!!! The boy does not listen. At all. We have to repeat ourselves like 300 times before he stops doing whatever we're trying to stop him from doing. At which point we're at our wits end and he's headed for a time out. And then he puts on his awful, but really very funny, MAD face and sulks and pouts and tries to make us feel bad (saying things like, "I'm not going to play with you!", or "I'm going to put you in a time-out!", or "that's not fair!", or "I'm not going to talk to you!"). But really we're just laughing on the inside, especially me cuz I know he got that face from me. And 2 minutes later he's back to being fun and cute and smart and fabulous. Exasperating, definitively.

LC is exasperating us as well, in a different way of course. As you can see from his photos, he is incredibly smiley and happy and has the most infectious laugh for a 6 month old. (note to self, I need to get that taped!) He is generally such a wonderful baby and everyone in his life is crazy about him. He has been a pretty easy going baby but also alert and decisive - he'll let us know when he wants something for sure. And he sleeps so well, during the day. He's a great napper, has been for most of his life. But then there's the night time, and it's anyone's guess as to what will happen. One night he sleeps through without a peep, and the next he wakes up 4 times. It's infuriating and we are so sick of the randomness. So we have started to sleep train him, with little success. Why little success despite 1 week of this? The biggest reason is because of the randomness! I'm not going to go into the details, but suffice to say we have had enough of the bad nights and need, that's right NEED, more of the good nights.

My mother arrives on Saturday and it's hard to believe her visit is actually here after so many months of planning and waiting. We will all have a fantastic time and I can't wait for her to play with C and get to know LC. And she and I are headed to Bali for 5 blissful, child and husband free days and I'm totally excited for it. Unfortunately work-wise it is turning out to be the absolute worst time. I will have 3 colleagues from DC here at the very same time, doing work that I want to be involved in but for which I will have limited time. But then that has been the story so far. I seem to always miss the important work events: training in Bangkok the very week I was in Bali with family and J's parents, important team building day-long workshop when we went to NZ, and now 2 major activities and visitors while my mom is here.

Speaking of work...

Go Packers!

2008-01-20T21:35:00.000+07:00

That's right, once again I find myself living overseas when my football team finds themselves in the playoffs. This happened when I was in Mali too, where friends and I went to watch the Superbowl at a bar. After agonizing over the fact that I didn't once see the Green Bay Packers play a game this whole season, knowing that they were doing so great, J finally found a source for us. Just in time for the playoffs - whew! So we will be going to this bar tomorrow night to see the game, taped. I'm going to do my darnedest to not find out how the game turns out. We'll see if I make it all day. It may be too much temptation...

Anyway, go Packers! I'd love it if Favre ended his career with a national championship.

Trip-ping on NZ

2008-01-08T20:33:00.000+07:00

J and I, being the somewhat travel crazy couple that we are, decided several months ago that in order to take advantage of living on this side of the planet we needed to get busy traveling to our list of destinations, no matter how painful it may be traveling with a 3 year old and a baby. And it being our first Christmas away I had a desire to spend the holiday with friends/family. So I contacted my Australian host family (from when I was an exchange student with AFS in high school) to find out where they would be for xmas and if they'd like to spend xmas with a family of 4. They said they would (silly, silly people) and that they would be at their vacation home in New Zealand. So we started to plan. We researched. We talked to people. We made bookings. And then we went to Bali for 10 days in October when LC was 3+ months old and realized that we may have made a very big, expensive mistake in deciding to take this NZ trip.

Well...we didn't make a mistake. We had a marvelous time! (Now, don't get me wrong. There were some tears, some complaining, some time-outs, some vomit, but all in all it was a good trip).

The flights
-Um, sucked.

-We booked with Singapore Air because we had such a good experience with them flying here from the US. The coach seats looked relatively spacious and comfy (we were fortunate to be in business class), the food was good, and the flight attendants were exceptional. Well, unfortunately this route to NZ didn't use a plane from their usual fleet and we were stuck on a plane with much smaller coach accommodation, right across from the kitchen! And this was an overnight flight. Here we are a family of 4 with 2 small kids right across from the bright, noisy kitchen from like 10 pm - 7 am. So the kids slept very fitfully and J and I slept a total of 1 hour, max. It was awful. The staff was great though, and the food was good, but we will be writing a letter of complaint, in addition to the complaining we did during the flight.

-Our route to NZ: Jakarta-Singapore-Auckland-Queenstown. About 18 hours of travel. 6 hour time difference. Remember the craziness??

-The return flight, which was a daytime flight and where we moved seats, was much better. But it was long, especially since LC was far too interested in what was going on around him to sleep. I mean, why sleep when there were people! and movies! and activity! all around, even if his eyes were red and teary and he was obviously in great need of some rest?

Queenstown
-The most beautiful and majestic area of the planet I've seen.

-Truly stunning and inspiring and gorgeous.

-Did I mention amazing?

-The town itself is funny. It's sort of this backpackers paradise, but also oozing cheap-touristy-"come on our boat tour! or bungee jump! or plane ride! or wine tour!" signs and shops everywhere. And it's expensive - all of NZ is expensive. Especially coming from cheap Indonesia, but even compared to the US it's expensive there.

-None of us suffered too much from jet lag, thank god. Matter of fact it totally worked in our favor. Both boys slept well and late for the first week of our trip. It was glorious to be able to sleep until like 7:30/8 every morning!

-The first day it rained, and this was pretty much the only day it rained for the next 10 days. We had great weather while we were there. Sunny and in the 60s-80s - perfect! Since it was raining we went on a winery tour at Gibbston Valley Wines, which has the largest underground wine cave in New Zealand. The wine was good and the restaurant was excellent (J made it a habit to always pick the best meal on the trip, so I was constantly salivating over his meals and stealing his food whenever possible. But shshshsh, don't tell him).

-C is a big fan of trains, so we took him on the Kingston Flyer steam train. It was an old train that is still powered by coal, and it was thus named by C as the "the stinky train". We all really enjoyed the ride, although driving there on the windy road didn't sit well with C. This is not where the vomit comes in, but we did have to stop a couple times.

C is saying "toot toot!"

-The night before we went on the train ride C woke up soon after going to bed feeling sick. We hung out in the bathroom thinking that he was going to be sick, and sure enough he did (vomit episode #1). He was better by the following morning though. Guess it was something he ate...

-By far one of the highlights was my horseback ride through Lord of the Rings country. It was spectacular. I signed up with Dart Stables for the Ride of the Rings tour, which was a 1.5 hour ride through areas where they filmed the 3 movies. We rode through Lothlorian forest where Galadriel and other elves lived, past Amon Hen where Boromir was defeated by orcs, and ended at Isengard and with a majestic view of the Misty Mountains and Methedras where the fellowship was forced to turn back because of Saruman's storm. It was a truly spectacular experience. Thank you J for taking the kids so I could go on this amazing ride!

Misty Mountains and Methedras

A view from my ride - the property there is called Paradise and you can see why

-While I was on my ride J took the boys up the mountain behind Queenstown on a cable car for a gorgeous view of the area.

-We also took a couple short hikes, C played at a park, strolled around Queenstown, slept, and enjoyed the perfect temperatures and smelled the sweet air.

Christchurch
-C talked a great deal about the snow he saw on the mountain tops in Queenstown. Since it's been 1 year since he saw snow and basically doesn't remember it, we thought it a good idea to take him to the Antarctic Center so he could touch snow and feel cold again. The center is home to the New Zealand, Italian and US antarctic programs. The center has several attractions, including a polar room with snow and cold like you'd feel in Antarctica. It even has a simulated storm so you can feel how bitterly cold it must get there. C didn't want to stay long (that's my boy!) and we didn't subject LC to it. I think J had the best time in there! There were films and lots of information on living in Antarctica and about the Antarctic programs, plus several penguins.

-We walked around Christchurch and enjoyed the beautiful botanical gardens. C and I smelled the vibrant roses, C climbed trees, and C especially enjoyed their awesome kids playground.

-I lost an entire day to being sick. This is where vomit story #2 comes in. I got sick in the middle of the night and was out of commission the following day. J was once again stuck taking care of both kids while on vacation. He definitely earned a few gold stars on this trip. So, for pretty much the first time in my life I got food poisoning. In New Zealand. Not in Mali, or Ghana, or Uganda or Ethiopia or Indonesia (don't get me wrong, I got sick in all those places, just not with food poisoning). But New Zealand - go figure.

-While I was sick J took the kids to the aquarium and shopping. I think they actually had a good time (for the most part...).

-On our final day we went to Akaroa, which is a small town on the coast that at one point was settled by the French. There is still a little bit of Frenchiness in the town, although not much. We went there because that's where my uncle now lives. He officially moved there with his wife 1 year ago and is now the resident architect for the whole area. He is swamped with work. They are also building their own house and I can tell from the drawings it's going to be amazing. I had never met his wife before so that was really fun, and I hadn't seen him in 9 years. I think he really enjoyed spending time with C and LC and both J and I had a really nice time catching up. We unfortunately couldn't go on the dolphin harbor cruise like we had planned thanks to my queasy stomach, but we still had a very nice time. I wish we could have stayed longer - next time we will hang out at their house for a few days instead of spending time in Christchurch.

Kawau Island
-1.5 hour drive from Auckland airport and 30 minute boat taxi ride to Hokimai Bay.

-We stayed with my Aussie host family who has owned the house for about 15 years. After I left Australia they soon moved to New Zealand for my host dad's work. They lived in Auckland for a couple years and bought the house when they left for Taiwan. My dad, mum and brother were there for the holidays and it was wonderful to spend 4 days catching up and feeling like part of the family again. I hadn't seen my host brother in about 15 years. He's 29 now! A man! It was weird, but really great to get to know him again. C right away liked him too (he liked them all, but especially him). I think he related to him as an older brother, and it was very sweet. Unfortunately my host sister couldn't be there. She lives in London now and has a very full life. I got to talk to her on the phone, but I sure wish she could have been there! I've actually seen more of her than the others though, with her visits to the US and my travels through London.

-We had a very relaxing time, ate good food, enjoyed the weather and the pretty views. We also went for boat rides around the harbor, took a nice little hike, went looking for seashells, and had lots of good chats.

View from their house

Auckland
-We walked the pants off Auckland and tired the whole family out. We walked around downtown but it was pretty boring. We thought the harbor area would be more interesting then it was. We thought it would be like Harbor Place in Baltimore, but it was much more of a yacht club and less developed for tourists than that. We then walked to the space needle like tower but decided not to go up it. We then walked to Victoria Market which we thought would be really cute with restaurants and good shops but it was much more chintzy. We then walked to Ponsonby Road which is supposed to be a fun area of town. It did look like it would be fun but by that time we were getting very tired (we did go back there for dinner and had our best meal in a New Zealand restaurant at The Living Room. It was a nice New Zealand send off!). And yet we then walked back to the hotel! So, while we saw much of Auckland that day, we weren't terribly impressed. It's a nice city, but nothing much worth talking about.

All in all
-We had a fabulous time and would recommend a visit. We look forward to the next time we go when the boys are older. New Zealand is most noted for its beauty and outdoor adventures, and yet with 2 small kids we were very limited in what we could do. I think it will be such a great time when the boys are pre-teen or teenagers and we can do all the exciting things there are to do there.

-The boys did really great. LC really rallied and didn't give us a hard time over missed or delayed naps and was generally very pleasant. C seemed to have a good time and also behaved well, but was ready to come home to his familiar environment and toys and nanny.

-We definitely kept busy, and tuckered the kids out!

All tuckered out

Concerns for Kenya

2008-01-07T17:34:00.000+07:00

Since the mayhem over the elections broke out in Kenya just a week ago I have been checking in with the news and with the Flametree blog that I regularly follow. The author has been diligent about writing and if you are interested in what's going on there I recommend checking in with her blog. I find it so much more insightful to hear a voice other than a reporter's when something like this happens. She mentions a few times about the surrealism of the situation - that despite the violence and strife surrounding her she must carry on with daily concerns. I remember feeling similarly after 9/11, and after the flooding here in Jakarta last January. I remember the odd feeling of having this ache in my heart and these fears for other people and this abstract knowledge that my life may change as a result, but that the reality of my day didn't change very much. I still had to go to class and do my homework (I was in grad school when 9/11 happened), or take care of C and find a house during the floods. Anyway, here's praying the Kenyan political parties figure out a solution.

Speaking of floods, rainy season has hit with a vengeance and there are once again floods in and around Jakarta. However, the situation is not nearly as serious as it was last year and the damage has been much more localized. Our complex was not affected last year so we have few concerns that we will experience any flooding.

Majestic New Zealand

2008-01-02T14:57:00.000+07:00

Until I have time to write about our trip, feast your eyes on these...

From Queenstown looking towards Glenorchy

Queenstown

Looking down onto Akaroa

Happy New Year!

2008-01-02T14:43:00.000+07:00

We're wishing you a very happy new year and hope that all your wishes come true! B, J, C, and LC

Barbie

2007-12-13T17:21:00.001+07:00

You may be wondering why I would post something with the title "Barbie". Well, I did a pretty fun thing this morning. All of the Mattel Barbies in the world are made in either China or Indonesia. Mattel Indonesia grants one tour/month, and one of those tours every year is granted to the AWA. Only 20 people get to go and I was lucky enough to have my name drawn in the lottery. So, this morning I drove to eastern Jakarta and toured the factory.

This one factory employs between 5,500-10,000 employees depending on the production demands and, if I'm remembering correctly, ships up to 1,000,000 Barbies/week. The factory only has an export license so all of the dolls have to be shipped out of the country and then imported back before they can be sold in Indonesian stores (stupid, I know). The place was immense, as you'd expect. And just thinking about the organization of producing all these little parts was mind boggling, even to my Virgo self. What I was most astonished by was how much hand work is involved in each doll. Every outfit is sewed by a woman on a sewing machine and all the hair is stitched on by a woman on a sewing machine. Then there are the "groomers", the women (I keep saying "woman" because over 80% of the production crew are women) who actually brush her hair, braid it or tie it up, and put on the hat or crown or sunglasses or whatever accessory she's shown with. Then there are the painters, the women who paint on the make-up by using a cut-out face mask over the face and running the face under a paint sprayer. And finally at the end there were the women who hand fixed the dolls to the packaging. It was incredible. I just assumed most of the work was done by machines, but instead so much of it is by hand. They say that producing one Barbie takes 3 minutes of actual work, and from design phase (headquarters are in California where all the Barbies are designed) to engineering to finished product takes about 1 month.

In the factory there was a huge map of Indonesia with a Barbie doll affixed to every part of the country. Each doll was dressed in clothes that were typical of that part of the country. It was quite cool. But the only Indonesian Barbie they sell is the Sumatra Barbie. It was definitely not the most interesting one though. The Barbies now wear underwear (I really don't know why, they don't have bras on and its not like they used to be anatomically correct) and their size proportions are much more realistic. She now looks like a shapely but fit young woman. If you remember, the first dolls, which debuted in 1959, had measurements that were nearly impossible.

And after the tour they fed us lunch and gave us a Barbie doll!!! I have to admit that the little girl in me is thrilled. I haven't owned a Barbie doll in like 20+ years and with having 2 sons I assumed I'd never have any girlie things in my house. But here I am with a Princess Barbie! Well, C has a Princess Barbie. I of course gave it to him and he loves it. My wonderful little boy loves his Barbie doll. I couldn't be happier! Of course he laughed like crazy when I took her gown off and she was naked. But I'll take it. And now she's taking a bath with him (all I could think about was that her beautiful ringlets were going to be ruined! I guess I'm still such a girl inside).

Christmas and such

2007-12-11T20:12:00.000+07:00

Santa came early this year, carrying a big bag o' presents. Since we're leaving Saturday for our grand adventure in New Zealand, we asked Santa to deliver most of the presents last weekend. Especially the big ones. Like C's new Batman Bike! It was a huge hit as expected. He is racing around the complex, feeling the wind in his hair, showing off to the girls... He really was in need of a new bike too. He had outgrown his tricycle and I felt a little bad watching his little legs peddling furiously as he tried to keep up with the big kids (and even kids his own age). Now he has a bike that is a little on the big side and has an adjustable seat, so it should last a while. LC didn't score nearly as big in the Christmas windfall. He has all of C's baby toys and doesn't know the difference anyway.

Christmas is more visible here than I had expected. There is Christmas music playing in the malls, decorations adorning shop windows, plenty of ornaments and fake Christmas trees. Thankfully it isn't overkill though; it doesn't make me want to throw up from all the dripping tinsel and jingle bells. It would be awfully silly if it were overdone anyway; it's already a little odd to see Christmas decorations in a Muslim country in the tropics.

In other news, C is really turning into a little boy. He has entered the "poopey head" phase. Evidently it is HILARIOUS! All of a sudden he will yell out, "poop!", and burst out laughing. He and his friends amuse each other endlessly yelling out different phrases with the word "poop" in it. I read that this is a healthy phase because they are developing their sense of humor, so I waver between laughing along or ignoring it depending on my mood. What I don't tolerate is the screaming. Agh. It's amazing how loud one 3 year old can be, and especially a group of them! He also seems to have a harder and harder time listening. We will repeatedly tell him no to something and he will do it anyway. The time-outs are returning with increased frequency lately, and we're getting quite sick of it. I'm bracing myself for the likelihood that this will last a while.

As for LC, he is entering into one of my all time favorite ages. I feel that for the first 6 months a parent is making a deposit on the fun and wonder that comes in the next 6 months. LC is rolling over more and more often. He is always quite happy with himself when he does it, until he realizes he's stuck on his belly. He is laughing more easily now as well. His father is particularly good at making him laugh and smile and he has a wonderful full giggly laugh that is totally addictive. He is sleeping better too most nights. He has slept through the night or straight through until 4 or 5 a number of times in the last week or two. There are 2 main problems though (there is always something, isn't there?). He wakes up too early. Sometimes he doesn't go back to sleep if he wakes up at 5, and he almost never goes back to sleep if he wakes up at 5:30. If we make it until 6 I feel fortunate. I think it's crazy for a 5 month old to wake up so early, but maybe it's common. The other problem is his sleep has become totally random. One night he'll sleep through the night, and the next he'll wake up 5 times. I rack my brain trying to figure out why, but I can never come up with a consistent reason. It's maddening. And of course now that he's rolling over more he's probably going to sleep poorly again. Plus we're going on a major trip that, based on our Bali trip experience, is going to totally mess him up again. I just pray it doesn't take us 5 weeks to get back on track!

What other bits of randomness can I tell you... Work is in the lull before the storm I think. January is certain to be crazy and I expect I'll have to work close to full time. It looks like I'm going to have to open a project office, manage it, hire employees, and both do and oversee the technical work for the project to be up and running in March, all on 50% time. It makes my belly flip over just thinking about it. So let's move on to...

Our vacation to New Zealand in 4 days! (I'm going to ignore the fact that we're quite unprepared for this). I can't wait for the majestic views, cooler temps and fresh air! We're spending 4 days in Queenstown, 4 days in Christchurch (one of which will be seeing my uncle who now lives nearby), 2 days in Auckland and 4 days with my Aussie host parents (from when I was an exchange student in high school) on this island west of Auckland. I think it's a good itinerary, except for the 2 kid factor. We may be a bit insane to do this; I hope we don't end up having a miserable time... This of course depends on LC and how well he sleeps for us and how hard of a time he gives us about his naps. Having a nanny is great for so many reasons, but the down side is that he's accustomed to only sleeping in his crib and won't sleep easily in the car or stroller. Let's hope he learns how quickly on this trip! When we planned it we knew it could be very challenging. But, we've never been to Asia before and we have a lot to see in this part of the world. So, we need to start before we run out of time.

So, I'll have lots to talk about in the new year, and hopefully I will have time to write. Here's wishing you all happy holidays, safe travels, good gifts, much merry making, and warm toes!

Happy December

2007-12-03T15:03:00.000+07:00

I was going to wait until Christmas to post this photo, but I really can't wait. I mean, come on! can my son be ANY CUTER?! It feels like cruel and unusual punishment to deny you the joy of this photo for any length of time (yes, I know I'm such a modest mom). Plus, I'm hoping during our two Christmas celebrations we'll snap a couple more gems. Enjoy!

Nights of hell

2007-11-28T16:39:00.000+07:00

LC rolled over 2 days ago! And I had just left the room not 5 seconds before it happened. He hasn't repeated his performance, despite our efforts, but I'm sure they will happen with increased frequency. He even rolled over from his back to his front, which is harder to do. Such a strong kid.

Perhaps this new developmental stage can explain the horrible nights LC has given us over the past several weeks. Fortunately they have improved dramatically this past week, but there was one week recently that was even worse than when he was a newborn. For about 3 nights in a row I was awake from about 2-5 every morning, and J had it almost as bad. LC kept waking up, wouldn't go back to sleep easily, waking up early and thinking it was time to get up, you name it we had it. So I'm not sure if it was due to the upcoming rolling over breakthrough, or the vaccinations he got, or a possible allergy to cow's milk, or to him just being a pain in the a**. I took him to the doctor last week to find out if there was anything medically wrong with him, like an ear infection, etc. The doctor took a stool and urine sample as well and discovered that he doesn't process fat well. I have long suspected that he doesn't tolerate dairy well, so I have limited my diet of cheese, milk, ice cream, etc. since he was just a couple weeks old. We have been giving him one bottle of formula for some time now, and didn't notice anything dramatically different when we started (except for some constipation issues if you want to know the details...). We've now switched him to soy milk formula but aren't sure if the improvements in sleeping are due to this change or to getting over the effects from the vaccinations or because our many threats to send him out with the trash finally sunk in. In any case, god willing his sleep will continue to improve and we will be a happier household.

On a side note, we found a wonderful doctor. And she's close! I was taking the kids to a pediatrician who was relatively nearby. However, after twice having to wait over 1 hour for our scheduled appointment I switched over to a family doctor in a new clinic just down the road. And she is wonderful! I can call the day of, get a scheduled appointment, and am seeing her at the appointed time. I love having a family doctor who knows the whole family, etc. She is very thorough and takes her time. And she calls within 1 week of the visit to check on the patient! Can you believe it?

Some photos from today and this past Saturday. C's school put on a charity bazaar/open house event that was actually really nice. They had all sorts of little games, face painting, and Santa Clause. So, for the first time in C's life he was willing to sit on Santa's lap. Right here in Muslim Indonesia!

The hungry boy and other randomness

2007-11-19T20:22:00.000+07:00

We have moved on to a next stage in LC's little life. He started rice cereal 3 days ago and is already eating everything we offer him. I wasn't planning to start him on solids until he was 6 months old. I remember that it's a bit of a pain and I wasn't in any hurry. But then it finally dawned on me that perhaps the reason he kept waking up between going to bed and his 10 pm bottle was because he was still hungry. Actually, it was this and realizing the only time he is cranky after nursing (he's usually happy as a clam and starts chatting away) is after his 6 pm feed, so maybe it's because he's still hungry. Ah ha! DUH! So we'll see how it goes. The last couple nights he's only woken briefly so it may be the trick. I wish I had thought of this when J left for the US; it may have saved me many nights of hell and exhaustion...

C and I got flu shots today. It's the first shot C has had since this time last year. It's a different story when he's so much more cognizant of what's going on around him. He did a good job though. Sort of. He started crying before the needle even touched him, cried through it, and then promptly stopped when it was over. I've been sick 3 times since moving to Jakarta, so I feel like I need all the help I can get to stay well. I seem to pick up everything that C brings home from school. My defenses are always so weak when I'm run down, from being pregnant and now sleep deprived. Plus, we need to protect LC from getting anything bad.

J came home yesterday afternoon and we are all thrilled to have him back. And C waited a whole 2 minutes before he asked for his presents. I can't really blame him...J did come home baring some great gifts! Just one of his bags weighed 67 lbs, so you get the idea why it felt like an early Christmas. Some of the gifts for C are for Christmas, but he got a few right away (including batman matchbox cars - this boy is still crazy about his cars. He has so many and yet he never tires of more) so he's been busy playing with those and carrying them around with him everywhere he goes. Speaking of which, what is that?? Why do all toddlers and preschoolers like to carry bags and their favorite toys du jour everywhere they go? Anyway, so we are still basking in the glory of having our family complete again, although J is very jet lagged and was in bed by 9 tonight, which isn't bad actually. It is a very long way to come.

November update

2007-11-15T16:54:00.000+07:00

Just before LC's 5 month birthday, and he weighs in at 18 lbs. He's not rolling over yet, probably due to all the fat he has to move! But he's getting there and I expect he'll start doing it soon. He loves playing with his toys and is now getting mad at us if we take them away. His favorite toys are a vibrating butterfly that his nana gave him, a different butterfly that was also one of C's favorites, and really anything that he can hold and put in his mouth. He likes his bouncy seat although he's getting too big for it, likes his gymini and mobile. And now he's been introduced to the exersaucer and it's a big hit!

I think he's a pretty textbook kind of kid - generally happy and smiley but fussy when he wants something. He's given us a few wakeless nights and we pray that they become more and more common. Of course his dad managed to miss the worst of it. He left for a business trip to the US about 1 week after we moved into our new house. Well, all the changes with the Bali trip and the new house didn't sit so well with LC, and he turned into a Terrible Sleeper. It was a solid week or so of hell. New house with boxes unpacked, me squeezing in work whenever I could, and a very wakeful and screaming baby. All on my own. Thanks dear. Fortunately he's on the mend though and his dad returns soon. Just as things are calming down, of course.

C started swimming lessons yesterday, finally. It's something I've wanted to do for him since we moved here, and it's finally happening. All of his 3 year old friends can swim fairly independently, and so C has a long way to go. I don't like living in a place with so many swimming pools and C not being able to swim. I like that the swim instructor teaches them (or tries to anyway) how to turn around and swim to the side in case they were to fall in. Drowning is the second leading cause of unintentional injury-related death in the US, so I'm not totally paranoid. I'm going to start LC in early '08, so he grows up knowing how to swim.

Below is C in a bajaj. It's basically a shell around a motorcycle, and I think you find them all over Asia (this website says you find them in Africa too, but I don't remember ever seeing them there). C loves them! On the rare occasion when our car isn't available to pick up C from school, the nanny will go get him and bring him back in one of these. It costs like $1 for the trip and he he has such a good time. Of course, here I am rambling before about injury prevention, and I'm letting my son ride in one of these death traps. Oops. I guess that's where the silver lining in the constant Jakarta traffic can be found. He'd never pick up enough speed to experience much damage.

Worker bee

2007-11-13T20:56:00.000+07:00

I haven’t really spent any time telling you about the work I’m doing here in Indo. Until last month there wasn’t a whole lot to tell as the amount of work I was doing was pretty minimal and only mildly interesting. However, as of 3 weeks ago my workload has been bumped up to half-time and has become much more intense. On one hand I am struggling to keep it to 50% because I could be doing this full time right now, but on the other hand I’m doing this largely from home and with 2 little kids in the house it’s proving to be very challenging to find the time. Plus, I don’t even have to be working right now. There are other things I want to be doing and I have to readjust my state of mind and schedules to find the right balance.

The work is very interesting though, and important. As some of you may know, more cases of human Avian Influenza (bird flu) have occurred in Indonesia (113 to date) than anywhere else. Because of this and the great fear around the world of this disease becoming either efficiently transmitted from bird to human, or even worse from human to human, the US government (and others) is pouring quite a bit of money and resources into learning about the disease and containing it. This is where I come in. USAID has a contract with my company to procure various drugs and supplies to donate to developing countries. In 2006 they decided to send some decontamination kits and personal protective equipment to Indo to help protect investigators when they go out to investigate an outbreak among birds. So for the last several months I have been doing a little work to help bring those supplies into Indo and track their use and reorder when necessary.

Now, however, the US government has decided that vaccinating chickens against bird flu may help reduce the viral load in chickens and therefore help contain the disease. Well, there are 3 million chickens born every day in Indo. There are 17,000 islands in Indo. Complicated and overwhelming task? Yes! So, my project has been asked to procure the vaccines and get them down to the district level. They are only doing this in 6-8 districts in West Java, where 60% of the chickens are, so that makes things easier. I don’t think they realistically believe all chickens in Indo will ever be vaccinated. We can’t even get all children in Indo vaccinated, much less chickens! This task is further complicated by the fact that vaccines have to be stored at a certain cold temperature (4-8 degrees Celsius in this case) until they are used. This is a huge task in a tropical climate and developing country where electricity is not always ensured nor working refrigerators present in all locations. Therefore, we have to figure out how we’re going to get it there under the right conditions (cold chain logistics). Another complication to this already daunting task is the fact they don’t have a really efficacious vaccine. There are vaccines (for chickens, not for humans) and they work against some strains, but not against others. Being influenza, the virus is always mutating, so the powers that be will continuously have to monitor the ever changing virus strains (just like you have to get a new flu vaccine every year).

And seeing as I’m the only project employee living here, I will be doing much of the work dealing with the logistics of vaccinating a whole pant load of chickens. Plus I’m on a huge learning curve here. I do not know much about vaccines or chickens or cold chain logistics! It feels overwhelming, especially since this came as a huge surprise. Three weeks ago I had no idea I’d be thrown into this. I was going on my merry way thinking that come March or so I’d start drumming up some more work. And now I’ve got more than expected. Fortunately I'm working with some really great people who are doing other components of the work required to get this thing off the ground.

There are other things that have been added to my workload as well. Like organizing a workshop for the government's bird flu committee on emergency preparedness. Again, what? Zoinks scoob...

It’s exciting to be doing this work though. It’s an emerging disease and I’m living in the epicenter. I imagine I’ll gain a lot of expertise and will be at the forefront of what’s being done to combat it. The drawback though is that it’s taking me farther and farther away from my true passion of maternal and child health. That is what I got my master’s degree in, and yet my career so far has been related but not directly linked. But I do like it and it’s a good deal for me right now, and it’s certainly exciting!

Moving on...over

2007-11-08T20:34:00.000+07:00

In addition to the many things that happened in October, we moved into a new house. It's something we had been considering for a little while, and finally we got around to talking to our realtor about it. Well, the first people to see it loved it (which made us reconsider, of course). The following few weeks was a roller coaster. There were several complications to our moving, including the 2 year lease we signed when we moved in (very common here), the requirement that we could secure our new house at the same time we finalized the sublease, the landlady agreeing to the special considerations that must be given to the new tenants as Belgian embassy staff, the new tenants' willingness to not have much done to the house as a condition of their move, and the timing of moving around idil fitri and our trip to Bali. One day it looked like we'd move, and the next it wouldn't. Well, the day before we left for Bali it all came together, and we moved 3 days after we got back.

Why, you may ask, did we go through all this pain and agony? At the time we wondered that ourselves. But now that we've moved we feel we were right in doing so. One of the main reasons was that the motorcycle noise was annoying us, and it was on the kids' side of the house and we worried about it waking them up. The last thing J wanted to hear after spending 1 hour in Jakarta traffic to get home was the sound of the ever present motorcycles. A big reason for me to move was the constant mosquito problem in the house. It was an older house and not well sealed, and no matter what we did there were always lots of mosquitoes in the house. We had to have it sprayed once/month to try to get rid of them, and god knows what those chemicals might do to our young kids. Then again, I also didn't want them to get dengue fever or malaria. In addition to these big reasons, there were many other minor inconveniences that all added up to a desire to move.

Our new house is in a complex of about 35 houses, just a few blocks away from our old house. There are 3 playgrounds (very sparse in Jakarta) and lots of children. C is able to ride his bike on the streets and take walks without inhaling exhaust fume and dodging motorcycles. He has already met several of the neighborhood kids, one of whom is an older girl. That's right, C is charming a sweet 7 year old down the street. We'll definitely keep our eye on him when he hits puberty! The house is much more conducive to family living and the management company is amazing. And while the mosque's call to prayer is actually louder here, there is NO motorcycle noise! We've given up the grandness of our other house, an incredibly gorgeous yard, and more exposure to Indonesian culture, but we think we made the right decision.

I have lots of reasons why I haven't been blogging in so many weeks, the move being just one of them. I'll try to get to all the other reasons soon.

Halloween

2007-10-31T14:06:00.000+07:00

Happy Halloween!

Super C to the rescue! That is, unless he's at school for the Halloween party... Once again, C decides to not wear a costume. It has been an ongoing refusal, but I thought we had finally broken through whatever anti-costume feelings he had. This time last year he refused to don his cowboy costume at school or for trick-or-treating. Then at his end-of-year concert he refused to wear the costume. But this year he has been wearing his superman costume in the house and wore it to the Halloween party with his playgroup. So, I thought we were over this, whatever this is. But no. This morning at school he got as far as putting the shirt on before he decided against it and demanded it to be taken off. Despite my and the teacher's attempts at convincing him otherwise, he celebrated the Halloween party in his street clothes. Ah well, I guess I'll save money and energy in not having to get a costume for him every year...

In the meantime, again

2007-10-30T11:51:00.000+07:00

Too busy to post, and yet I have so much to say, so much catching up... And the list keeps growing which makes finding the time to update you all on our activities even more challenging. In the meantime, here is a photo taken yesterday. I don't want you to think I've forgotten about you all...

Tummy time squared

Bali sunset

2007-10-22T19:40:00.000+07:00

Ahhh Bali...what's not to love?

Spudlyness confirmed

2007-10-01T20:42:00.000+07:00

It is confirmed that LC is a spud. I checked C's baby book and he weighed 15 lb 8 oz at his 6 month visit. LC weighed the exact same at his 12 week visit. Definitely spudly.

J's parents arrived safely on Saturday and weren't even too exhausted. They have been busy, busy getting their fill of grandsons. C isn't giving them much of a break and I suspect they will be ready for a vacation after their vacation. Both boys are trying their darnedest to charm the pants off of their grandparents and I'm pretty sure they're both smitten for good. Of course, I can't blame them.

The cheeky pair

2007-09-28T21:49:00.000+07:00

Photos of my cheeky monkeys. The kid in the punchbowl is C when he was 6 months old. The other photo is of LC taken just today, at 13 weeks. They are wearing the same shirt, and you can tell that LC isn't going to fit in it much longer. The shirt is for 3-6 month old babies, and yet he's going to outgrow many of these clothes in a matter of a few weeks. He's such a spud. But a very cute spud.

Very cool website

2007-09-26T19:57:00.000+07:00

So a friend of mine passed this on to me because she thought it was "so up my alley". Well, she's very right. This is a great idea for both giving and receiving gifts. If you're like me, at this point in your lives there's little that we need or want that fits in that gift giving price range or that you couldn't buy for yourself. So, what better way to avoid just accumulating more "stuff" - how about having that money go to a worthy cause instead?!

Check it out, especially when considering Christmas or Hanukah gifts this year.

Ramadan revisited

2007-09-21T13:30:00.000+07:00

We are one week into the Islamic holy fasting month of Ramadan, when Muslims refrain from eating and drinking between sunrise and sunset. They therefore have to wake early to pray, eat and drink before the sun rises, and then wait 12 hours before they can even drink a glass of water again. Frankly I don't know how they do it. They tell me that they are so used to fasting one month every year since childhood that it isn't as great a hardship as we'd imagine. Although, I have noticed they are VERY eager to drink and eat as soon as the mosque announces that it is time at the end of the day.

The first night of Ramadan we were awoken at 2 a.m. by drumming coming from the street in front of our house. Fortunately we were warned this would happen. Evidently people came around drumming the first few nights to help wake people up in time to cook, eat, drink, and pray. We were quite worried because we find this neighborhood to be pretty noisy, and were afraid the drumming would be intolerably loud and would go on and on. We're already being woken up enough with an infant in the house, we don't need any more disturbances! Fortunately, even though the drumming woke us up, it didn't keep us up and honestly the sound of drumming reminded me of Mali. On a side note, why they would need to get up almost 4 hours early is beyond me. I don't know when they sleep!

The only other time I've lived in a country where Ramadan was widely observed was in Mali. However, I don't remember the routines changing as drastically as here. I suppose they got up earlier, but I remember hearing women preparing breakfast at horribly early hours all year long. And there certainly wasn't any drumming at 2 a.m. to wake the village up. Perhaps since rural life tends to wake and sleep according to the sun anyway, the month of Ramadan doesn't alter the schedule as much.

Other than hearing the mosque announcements more often, the drumming and a slight disruption to our evening routine, it has affected us very little. Most of the restaurants are still open for lunch, school is in session, etc. My mother will likely remember her experience in Mali riding the bus back from Mopti when the bus driver didn't want to stop for lunch because everyone on the bus was fasting. I became a typically rude American and demanded that we stop, pointing out that not everyone on the bus was Muslim. If I remember correctly it took some convincing though, and it was at a point in my experience when my tolerance level was at a low point. And plus, we were hungry! My husband will attest to the fact that I become quite crabby when I'm hungry. In any case, I suppose that might happen here as well. I don't know. I won't be taking any long bus rides any time soon.

Eid ul-Fitr marks the end of the month of Ramadan, which will happen in mid-October. This is a very important holiday when everyone who is able will go to their home villages to be with their families. The holiday is celebrated with festivities and lots of eating and drinking throughout the day. It's like Christmas and Thanksgiving rolled into one. From what I hear Jakarta will become like a ghost town. In some ways it would be a good time to be here. The streets will be empty and the town quiet. This year we won't be here though. We are escaping with J's parents (who arrive in only 6 days!) to the mostly Hindu island of Bali.

I really enjoyed this holiday while living in Mali. Everyone was joyful throughout the day, there was lots of music and conversation and good food. I roamed throughout my village visiting my friends and eating with them. Everyone donned their best outfits and gifts were shared. There was a big celebration with drumming, kora playing (similar to a guitar), and dancing. People from the surrounding small villages and compounds came for the celebration. I know that our Indonesian friends are looking forward to this holiday just as our Malian friends did.

I don't know how much blogging I'll be doing during the coming month. As I mentioned, J's parents arrive next Saturday and we'll be in Bali for 10 days of their stay. I imagine we'll be pretty busy so I'm not sure I'll be posting too much before November (not that I've been blogging all that much lately anyway...).

Fun guys

2007-09-14T22:51:00.000+07:00

Orphanages

2007-08-29T15:17:00.000+07:00

The last couple weeks have been filled with getting involved and rekindling old friendships. It feels good to get out of the house more and to start doing some of the things I've been wanting to do since before even coming to Indonesia. And an added bonus? More interesting things to write about! I'm still tired, but LC is having more good nights than bad nights so my energy level is improving. And my to-do list is still unbearably long, but I'm whittling away at it little by little.

Last week I was able to catch up with an old friend. When I was in high school I was an exchange student in Australia for one year. The program (AFS) organized us into groups so that we'd have a group of other exchange students with whom we could share experiences and lean on. There were 7 of us in my group: a Venezuelan, Japanese, Thai, Italian, French Canadian, Dane, and me. I've kept in touch with a few of them, have visited a couple of them (in Caracas and Montreal and Milan) and been visited by a couple of them (Venezuelan and Japanese). My Japanese friend now lives in Bangkok and had to come to Jakarta last week for business. She generously braved the Jakarta traffic to come to dinner at our home, meet J and take a peek at my sleeping boys. It was great to catch up with her and hear about her family and her life now. Thailand is very high on my list of places to visit so I'm sure I'll be seeing her again in Thailand.

Last week I also attended a meeting of the American Women's Association (AWA) Social Welfare Committee. This group grants money to different social causes in and around Jakarta. For example, they give money to several orphanages, provide scholarships for children to go to school (public school here is not entirely free - you have to pay for school uniforms, workbooks, pens, school fees, etc.), give money to mentally and physically disabled homes for adults and children, etc. Some of these places receive money from the government, but of course it's never enough. And some of them are started by generous and philanthropic individuals or churches (I'm not aware of us working with any mosques but we may) to meet the needs of their communities. To help them make ends meet these places make an application to the AWA, for example, which is reviewed by the committee and funds are awarded (or not). The committee gets its money from membership fees and the majority from corporate donations. It was a very interesting meeting and I'm excited to become part of this group of women who are doing some really wonderful things in the communities.

Part of the committee's responsibility is to visit the group that has submitted an application for a grant, and to make follow-up visits to ensure that the money is being used for the stated purposes. This morning I went with a group of women to visit an orphanage and home for pregnant women in Bogor. This place was started by an Australian woman (doctor I think) and doesn't receive any government funds because it is Christian (I asked if it is the same for Muslim sponsored places but they didn't know the answer - I suspect not). The pregnant women are single or married women who do not feel comfortable or safe remaining with their families. There were 4 women there at the time. While staying in the home they are taught a skill like knitting, and while they are there they make various crafts that are sold in the community or at bazaars.

The orphanage had about 8 children under 1, another 15 1-4 year olds, and about 10 preschoolers/kindergartners. They teach the older children themselves in the orphanage because its actually cheaper to hire a teacher than to pay school fees and related costs for all of the children. Many of the children in the orphanage are not actually up for adoption. This is quite common in Indonesia and in many other countries. The families bring the child to the orphanage because they can't afford to keep them at that time, but hope to be able to afford to later in their life. And families do sometimes take their children back when their financial situation improves. But other times not. And unfortunately some families only take the children back when they're old enough to work. I suppose in most cases this is fine because realistically not all the children would be adopted anyway. However, I hate to think that there might be children out there who are desired by other families but their biological families have them on "reserve" until they're old enough to work. I also heard that it's difficult to adopt a girl from a Christian orphanage because there aren't enough up for adoption (they're in higher demand). You can only adopt a child from an orphanage of your religion, so a Muslim can only adopt a Muslim child, and a Christian can only adopt a Christian child.

The place I visited was quite well run and evidently one of the nicest ones I will see. It was very clean and the children had their own beds and it was spacious enough. There are about 20 staff so the staff don't seem too overwhelmed, although they welcome volunteers. The toddlers seemed to have quite a few toys to play with and they were reading books when we came. There was a backyard and it was in a very quiet, nice neighborhood. And most importantly, the children seemed happy and the staff very loving. It was nice to learn that the vision in my head of what orphanages must be like is not always true, and that sometimes the children are actually in a better situation in an orphanage than they would be in a home. However, I know they aren't all as nice as this one and that there are others I will see that will break my heart.

Correction

2007-08-27T11:43:00.000+07:00

A couple quick corrections about the elections. It was actually for the governor of Jakarta, but for we Americans we would use "mayor". Also, the man who won used to be the vice-governor of Jakarta, not the vice-president of Indonesia. This is therefore a step forwards for him, and makes a lot more sense to us. Just another good example of the challenges of communicating across different languages...

Holidays abound

2007-08-20T09:33:00.000+07:00

Apparently we've moved to the land of holidays. It seems like there's a holiday every other week (that's not actually the case, but it does seem that way). We've had 3 holidays in the last 2 weeks: Jakarta mayoral elections, a religious holiday, and Independence Day.

The mayoral elections went smoothly, as far as I have heard. There were demonstrations and marches in the weeks leading up to the election, but nothing too contentious. The streets were quiet the day of and nobody expected there to be any problems. We saw a couple polling places in our neighborhood, so I have the impression that there were numerous polling stations and they were easy to get to. And notice - it was a holiday! People could go and vote and many did not have to take off of work to do it. What a concept! I think it is ridiculous that we don't do the same in the US, not even for the presidential election. I'm sure our economy can survive if we add another holiday every 4 years. So the winner of the election, with an easy win I believe, was the former vice-president of Indonesia. J and I thought this would be a step down, but evidently not. Maybe the vice-president of Indonesia has even less power than the vp of the US, and governing Jakarta is like governing New York City.

The religious holiday was a Muslim holiday. Most of them are; however, there is also a Hindu holiday and a Christian holiday. There is a holiday for the new year, and a holiday for the Chinese new year. Indonesia is predominantly Muslim, but it seems pretty smart and progressive to honor other religions and other traditions. We hear the call to prayer a few times per day and there are many mosques, but otherwise it isn't readily apparent that just about everyone is Muslim. I also expected that I would always need to wear long pants or skirts and shirts with sleeves on them, but this does not seem to be necessary here in Jakarta. Matter of fact, we have been shocked at the tiny short shorts we have seen women wearing in the shopping malls. We'll see how things change when Ramadan starts in a few weeks, but for the most part the fact that this is a predominantly Muslim society isn't prominent in every day life. I imagine outside of Jakarta this would be different...

Last Friday was Independence Day. My understanding is that celebrations are very neighborhood centered. There were decorations everywhere (red and white flags) and evidently there was a parade and games in the kampung (neighborhood) near our house. We didn't know what time the festivities took place (nobody seemed to know the day before) so unfortunately we didn't observe the celebrations. From what I heard though the festivities mostly consisted of games for older kids and adults, and it doesn't sound like we missed out on a lot. But it would have been interesting to see. It made me miss our own Independence Day. I'm sure we would have taken C to a parade and had a bbq with our friends. That would have been nice...

Jakarta becomes noticeably quieter on these long weekends. Many of our friends get out of Jakarta, and many Indonesians as well. The roads are less congested and it is wonderfully quieter in the city. Once LC is older we'll start to get out of Jakarta for these long weekends as well, although it's also nice and relaxing to stay here when the whole city vamps down a notch.

Regression City, Indonesia

2007-08-10T11:51:00.000+07:00

Last week had a tough beginning thanks to the two young boys of the household. Going back to school had quite an effect on C, and not a very good one it turns out, at least not in the short term. His first day back at school saw two potty accidents and three visits to our room during the night. The boy hasn't had an accident since the first week he was potty trained in May, and yet in this one day he had two. Then that night he woke up three times and came into our room. He wasn't up long, but these disturbances plus LC waking up was a double whammy. When parents say that having two children isn't just twice as hard but exponentially harder, I think they had this sort of night in mind. The following day was a repeat - two more accidents. Plus we're trying to get him potty trained for number two, but to no avail. Instead I'm incredibly frustrated and he's gotten a couple time-outs for outright lying to me about it. So we're just going to put that one on hold, again.

Plus there's LC. I should not have said he was sleeping better because all I did was jinx myself. The glorious 6-7 hour stretches of sleep were short-lived, and he is back to 3-4 hour stretches. Actually make that 1-4 hour stretches, because as the night progresses his sleeping abilities decrease dramatically. It's like 5:00 - 7:00 just sucks all around, whether it's in the morning or evening. By the end of the day I think he's just so tired that he's generally cranky, and I guess in the morning he has almost had enough sleep but not quite, and is cranky then too. I'm pretty ready for the night time routine to get better. This is getting old.

The good news though is that LC has started smiling for real. It's such a wonderful development and pretty much makes up for the lack of sleep. He's got a full-on toothy grin and his eyes totally light up. Add the smiles to his wonderful coos and it's pure joy! Right now he's singing all kinds of songs and it really is heavenly!

And C is having fun at school. I love that he can give me a full report now of the fun things he is doing there. He seems to be adapting quickly to his new teacher and new classroom. He is excited about school at the end of the morning.

I realize my posts of late have been really boring. I'm even bored writing them. Understandably, however, my days are very wrapped up with my children and there is little else going on right now. Plus, I just don't have the time or energy to write about much else, or to even write my posts well. I apologize. I will try to make my next post a bit more interesting, or at least on a topic other than my children...

All is fine

2007-08-10T07:18:00.001+07:00

The earthquake off Java occurred shortly after midnight on Thursday and measured 7 on the Richter scale. It was felt in Jakarta, even by people living in our area of town. There was some destruction in Jakarta but no injuries have been reported. We didn't feel a thing and didn't know about it until we looked at the news the next morning. For those of you who might have seen the headline and worried, we're all just fine.

Such a big boy

2007-08-06T10:27:00.000+07:00

My eldest son officially started preschool today, and last week he turned 3. I can't believe it. His new developments and accomplishments amaze me daily, and I am so proud of the boy he is becoming. He is so sweet and affectionate, a behavior for which I can't quite tell you how grateful I am. I love his uncoordinated hugs and sloppy kisses! And somewhere along the line he picked up the phrase, "you're the best mommy in the whole world", which he says daily and I eat it up every time. His memory also amazes us. He has memorized many of his books and will read to us rather than us reading to him. He will remember small things from our adventures and J and I will look at each other as if to say, how on earth does he remember that?! He is a total chatterbox. He will talk forever, saying the funniest things. This morning when we passed the mosque he explained to me how the men go inside the mosque to pray. They pray that the mosquitoes will be nice to him and not bite him. I love the things that he says!

He shares very well with other kids (most of the time) and enjoys playing with other children in a small group setting or one-to-one. Big groups and new experiences are somewhat daunting to him, but he quickly eases into it and then totally embraces it. Case in point was this morning: he went back to school this morning and started in a new class, the preschool room. He stood outside the class for several minutes, too shy to go in. However, once I pointed out the big digger to him, he ran inside and started chatting away, playing with the toys, showing the teacher his new shirt, etc. I was even able to say goodbye much earlier than I expected.

We had a really good time at his birthday party. Most of the kids and moms from our playgroup came, so there were 10 kids and 10 moms at the party. It was mayhem. But fun mayhem! We played a couple games and we got him a Lightening McQueen birthday cake. Everyone seemed to have fun, and it was his first birthday where he really seemed to understand what was going on and was really excited about his birthday. Thanks to all the gifts from friends, from us, and the packages arriving in the mail from grandparents and friends back home, he opened presents for 4 days straight. I'm afraid he may think this is normal... All in all it was a very successful day (exhausting for mom, but worth it) and now C is 3!

C and LC on C's birthday

Birthday cake

And my LC is growing well. He has started sleeping better and will sleep for 6-7 hours for the first stretch of the night. I hope this will stick and that the second stretch of time during the night will also get longer. I'm still getting up 2x/night, but at least I can get a longer stretch of sleep to begin with. I think his first smile is around the corner. I've seen some smiles already, but don't think they're quite the real thing yet. He's also started cooing more often, and the sound is beautiful!

Now that C is back at school and LC is starting to sleep better, I feel like I can really start settling in here. I have started going to a yoga class and will join a gym in the next month, and I hope to start C at swimming lessons and start myself at golf lessons in the near future. I hope to become more involved at the American Women's Association, and basically just start doing all the things that I've put off. And at some point I'd like to start doing a bit more work on some of my company's other projects here. Life will get busier, but in a good way.

In the meantime

2007-07-26T19:39:00.000+07:00

A couple photos to keep the regulars happy...

No time for blogging

2007-07-23T12:00:00.000+07:00

Between the kids, naps and the new Harry Potter book, I have little time for much else I'm afraid. Not much to write about anyway. My days are filled with baby, baby, baby and sneaking in sleep and rest and meals when I can. I keep hoping that LC will fall into a routine but his naps are so hit or miss. Getting him to sleep isn't that difficult, it's getting him to stay asleep that's the problem!

One interesting note on Harry Potter, I was surprised how greatly Jakarta bookstores jumped on the Harry hoopla. Some stores were open all night so as to start selling the book at midnight, others opened early, and all seemed to have some activity opening day (Harry Potter dress-up, crafts, etc.). The book they sell here is smaller than the size that is sold in the US. Don't know why...

Anyway, so I may not resurface again until I've finished the book.

Home, Sweet Home

2007-07-19T17:51:00.000+07:00

I wasn’t sure coming back to Jakarta would ever feel so good (we came back last Friday). Especially when leaving the clean air, beautiful parks, great restaurants, and amazing efficiency that is Singapore. But it does feel so good to be home. We have our baby things now, we have help again, C has people other than his boring parents to play with, we have friends to hang out with, and we have space to spread out. I’m sure within a matter of a few weeks Jakarta will start to annoy us again, but for right now it feels great. And as we drove back from the airport, back onto our street where there were small children riding their bikes and men pushing carts selling nasi goreng and neighborhood guards chatting to eachother, I knew that this is a better place to be than Singapore. Jakarta is oh so much more colorful and interesting.

Then again, I’ve been thinking a lot about home. I’ve spent enough time living very far away from home to know about homesickness. What has surprised me this time around is that it has snuck up on me sooner than I expected. The reason, I believe, can mostly be found in my 2 wonderful sons. They have a fantastic family back home and they are missing quality time with them. We lived within walking distance of some of our best friends who also had children C’s age, and I so miss walking to the neighborhood park to meet them or sitting on our back patio having a bbq while the kids played in the back yard. And I have good friends back home who have just had their second babies or will soon, and I can’t believe that I probably won’t meet them and vice versa until LC is 1.5 years old. Sometimes I have asked myself if we were crazy to leave all that we had. And sometimes it feels that we were. But not for long, because I know that we are fulfilling a dream to live overseas and we would never be content until we realized that dream. I know that the experience our boys are having here will open up their worlds like nothing else can, and I believe they will be the richer and more wonderful for it. I know that career-wise it was a good move for both of us, especially J. I know that our friends and family still love us and that won’t stop no matter where we are. But, it is still hard at times to be away, to know the things that we are missing and what our boys are missing.

For now though, I’m going to focus on the fact that this feels like home, this place half way across the world in a tropical climate full of exotic food and dengue fever. And that before I know it this experience will be over and I don’t want to regret spending too much time thinking of my American home.

2 weeks and still smiling

2007-07-07T14:31:00.000+07:00

LC is 2 weeks old today! He and his brother have been keeping us busy, to say the least. Our lives have become the Grand Juggling Act, as we try to keep up with their varying needs, with my sleep, with J's work... Singapore has some wonderful conveniences and is a great break from Jakarta, but we are looking forward to getting home where we have all of our baby stuff, some help, and where J can focus on work.

So far LC seems like a pretty easy going kid. He rarely cries and when he does it's pretty easy to figure out the problem. He is still sleeping a lot, but is also eating a lot - I am already looking forward to longer stretches of sleep and a little more predictability. He is also a Grunter, and as such I have nicknamed him Sir Grunts A lot. What this is about we're not quite sure, but our best guess is his ploy to get held as this seems to be the best way to quiet the ruckus.

I am definitely tired, but I don't feel as tired as I remember being after I had C. You would think I'd be more tired with trying to keep up with a toddler as well. Perhaps my body and mind are just more conditioned to sleep deprivation thanks to 3 years with C, and this new addition isn't as much a shock to my system.

I have even managed to get out and see some more Singapore sites. This past week we walked around Fort Canning Park, went to Underwater World on Sentosa Island, and to the Jurong Bird Park. This coming week we hope to get to the Botanical Gardens and the zoo before leaving for Jakarta. So we are definitely keeping busy!

Well, Sir Grunts A lot is currently singing his song, so that's all for now.

Oh BABY!

2007-06-25T15:21:00.000+07:00

He's here, he's here! Our newest bundle of love arrived just after midnight on June 23, weighing in at a healthy 8 lbs even. Unfortunately for this blog his name also starts with "C", so I will call him Little C, or LC for short. Labor was soooooo much better this time around, so much shorter, so much less painful, so much less pushing, and I think as a result the recovery is already going better. He is gorgeous, of course, and is sleeping A LOT! I have had to wake him to eat, although I expect that will change over the next few days. He is afterall not yet 3 days old. He looks a lot like his brother did when he was born, although he doesn't have quite the same massive cheek dimensions. C loves his little brother and is happily giving him many hugs and kisses, sharing his toys with him, wanting to hold him, etc.

This morning J got LC's Singapore birth certificate. It still feels a little crazy that my second son was born in Singapore! Tomorrow we head to the US Embassy to start the passport process. We expect it will take about 2 weeks, at which time we can go back to Jakarta.

Here are a couple of photos of LC.